Battle for the Glory of Satan! [TURN 1] LATE SIGNUP OPEN

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Battle for the Glory of Satan! [TURN 1] LATE SIGNUP OPEN

Postby Flamer Shaftglutton » Fri Jul 06, 2018 11:30 pm

Turn 1:
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ninja_bait attempts to put an "innocent" bystander on Ring 2 out of his misery, but botches the damage roll. The man continues being stabbed in the butt by a demon.

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StalinsFavoriteKhat (whose turns are being played by my wife until he gets back) lines himself up to have a nearby woman and a few babies in his gun's sights. He hits and does enough overkill damage to take out the woman and a baby.

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motorhead fan sweeps his weapon, decapitating a woman and catching her head on the spear in one elegant motion.

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TheVengefulOne leaps over a log to bisect a baby with his halberd. Or attempts to, anyway. He rolls a 1 for skill, tripping over the log and landing on his face.

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Bragallot, a former space miner, digs a hole in the ground, hoping for a better weapon than a shovel. Strangely he finds a mysterious beer-like potion. He then heads to the skeleton band and starts moshing.

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ReconMiner slides into the shadow of the cliff and aims his unfamiliar gun at StalinsFavoriteKhat. More comfortable with flamethrowers, he does his best to figure out the advanced weapon's controls. He rolls well for skill, but rolls a truly terrifying 22+1 damage. He's rocked by the recoil and looks up to see only a smoking crater where StalinsFavoriteKhat once stood.

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Max-hell von Hammerman (Scribonius) scoops up a cow skull before leaping onto a man looking up at Ring 2. He pummels the bystander with his warhammers, gaining a second skull.

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Flamer Shaftglutton sneaks up behind a guy watching the skeleton band and whispers, "Nothing personal kid." He rolls a 5 for skill, easily hitting the target. Yet he rolled a 1 (so 0) for damage. The blade barely grazes the man's neck. The bananaman whispers into the other ear, "Sorry... I made this weird."

Preview of Turn 2:
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StalinsFavoriteKhat, obliterated only a moment before, awakens in a river of blood, surrounded by the Wrathful trying to drown each other.

Current Standings:
  • ninja_bait: maroon baseplate, Ring 2, 0 Skulls, 2 respawns remaining.
  • StalinsFavoriteKhat: red baseplate, Ring 5, 1.5 Skulls, 1 respawns remaining.
  • motorhead fan: hunter green baseplate, Ring 1, 1 Skull, 2 respawns remaining.
  • TheVengefulOne: black baseplate, Ring 1, 0 Skulls, 2 respawns remaining.
  • Bragallot: baby blue baseplate, mysterious beer, Ring 1, 0 Skulls, 2 respawns remaining.
  • ReconMiner: yellow baseplate, Ring 1, 1 Skull, 2 respawns remaining.
  • Scribonius: olive green baseplate, Ring 1, 2 Skulls, 2 respawns remaining.
  • Flamer Shaftglutton: dark gray baseplate, Ring 1, 0 Skulls, 2 respawns remaining.

Other stuff:
1. Everyone got their orders in quickly so this turn got done ahead of schedule. Orders are due Wednesday, but if everyone gets their orders in by Monday we'll sneak another turn in.
2. StalinsFavoriteKhat respawned on Ring 5: Wrath. Technically you do not respawn until the start of your turn (so you can't be spawn-killed before you can take an action), but I will show you where you will respawn ahead of time so you can plan your next turn accordingly. Plus he looked cool with the LEDs back-lighting him.
3. Late sign-ups are still open! Anyone who wants to join is free to do so.
motorhead fan wrote:I hope for more butt stuff in the future!
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Re: Battle for the Glory of Satan! [TURN 1] LATE SIGNUP OPEN

Postby RedRover » Fri Jul 06, 2018 11:44 pm

I’d love to join!

I’d like some red-neck doomsday bunker looking fellow with a shot gun or some other hick type weapon

Sin: Got drunk and urniated off a billboard onto the freeway while wearing a tinfoil hat.

Name: Kenneth from Walmart
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Re: Battle for the Glory of Satan! [TURN 1] LATE SIGNUP OPEN

Postby Duerer » Sat Jul 07, 2018 12:30 am

Also wanna join if I may

Name: xXx_3Raz0r_xXx
Outfit: Black fedora, black trench coat, greasy scruffy beard
Weaponry: Two katanas and his own body odor
Sin: Jacked up his mom's electricity bill into exorbitant heights due to mining crypto coins 24/7
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Re: Battle for the Glory of Satan! [TURN 1] LATE SIGNUP OPEN

Postby Craigallot » Sat Jul 07, 2018 2:15 am

BEER?! Drink it! It would be unfortunate if the Demonic Beer puts me in a violent rage that has me accidentally kill some of the bystanders. The Quest for a Weapon also continues... maybe I can make a club out of someone's spine?
Zahru II wrote:'HEROIC MEAL TIME DRUNK OFF THAT YE OLDE JACK DAGNALS. HATER PREPARED TO BE MASHED LIKE TATERS, CUZ WE DON'T F*** AROUND. Ah whaddup, dwarf SAWSE.'

Fantasy Battles - Scifi Battles
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Re: Battle for the Glory of Satan! [TURN 1] LATE SIGNUP OPEN

Postby ninja_bait » Sat Jul 07, 2018 5:34 am

I suppose I will try again to kill the bystander, then move on to add the next ring.
I make spaceships and spaceship accessories.
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Re: Battle for the Glory of Satan! [TURN 1] LATE SIGNUP OPEN

Postby Scribonius » Sat Jul 07, 2018 11:24 am

If I'm judging the battlefield correctly, I'm standing pretty close to The Vengeful One. I attack him while he's down! Skulls for Gruumush!
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Re: Battle for the Glory of Satan! [TURN 1] LATE SIGNUP OPEN

Postby TheCraigfulOne » Sat Jul 07, 2018 11:55 am

Scribonius wrote:If I'm judging the battlefield correctly, I'm standing pretty close to The Vengeful One. I attack him while he's down! Skulls for Gruumush!


Good thing we're not PMing orders, eh?

I pick myself up and decide I'm in the mood for a nice orc kebab.
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Re: Battle for the Glory of Satan! [TURN 1] LATE SIGNUP OPEN

Postby ReconMiner » Sat Jul 07, 2018 4:31 pm

I move to the spider web then turn around and shoot at the lady on the ring above (purple outfit)
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Re: Battle for the Glory of Satan! [TURN 1] LATE SIGNUP OPEN

Postby motorhead fan » Sun Jul 08, 2018 2:04 pm

I PMed my orders, should I write them here in future or is it Ok if I keep PMing them?
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Re: Battle for the Glory of Satan! [TURN 1] LATE SIGNUP OPEN

Postby Flamer Shaftglutton » Sun Jul 08, 2018 3:11 pm

motorhead fan wrote:I PMed my orders, should I write them here in future or is it Ok if I keep PMing them?

PM or post in the thread is fine. I check both regularly. Definitely PM if you have secret orders, and definitely a post in the thread if you don't want me to steal your jokes.

Turn 2 is up!
motorhead fan wrote:I hope for more butt stuff in the future!
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