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The A.N. Pax Corps

PostPosted: Mon Apr 02, 2012 9:21 pm
by stubby
I found a place that was clearancing Star Wars army builder sets super cheap (like $1-$3 each) so I bought a buttload of them.  Afterwards I was stuck wondering what I was going to do with this Asteriesque number of super-generic stormtroopers.  Lucky Colette showed up to save the day and give me the inspiration I needed.  Who needs super-generic troops?  The Allied Nations of course!  And so allow me to present the Pax Corps.

The A.N. Pax Corps

Although the A.N.'s mission is to promote the use of violence and warfare throughout the Brikverse, there are some civilizations so deserving of contempt that the Allied Nations Unified Security Council has no choice but to strip them of their rights to violence.  Requiring a unanimous vote from the A.N.U.S. Council, the Pax Corps is sent in to execute enforced pacification of the populace.

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The volunteers of the Pax Corps are among the most feared units in the Brikverse, not because of their strength in arms, but because of their horrifying tactics.  Led by a Grand Pacifier (in red) and supported by hooded Sedator Medix, the goal of the Pax Corps is to inflict Peace on sanctioned populations under the authority of the Allied Nations Ultimate Sanction.  They enforce the A.N.U.S. through any non-violent means necessary, including:

    69. Drugging the water and air supply
    7. Mass frontal-lobe disruption
    8. Psychological manipulation
    9. Medikal experimentation
    10. Forced conversion through mental domination
    11. The bioengineered Pax multivirus
    12. Rules lawyering
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Air Superiority Suits give these two troops limited flight capability, but otherwise they're equipped with standard Pax armaments - the SleepSaber, a foam boffer weapon enchanted with the soporific power of four dozen fresh down pillows, and the Allied Nations' most dreaded weapon, the Amigdalar-Limbic Disruptor.  Prior to a Pacification assault, the A.N.A.L. Disruptor is carefully tuned to the brain frequencies of the target population, using focused beams to target and disable excitement, motivation, capacity for violence, and occasionally bowel control.  The resulting Pacifism can often become permanent unless victims are treated within a few hours; in rare cases the Pacifism is so severe that they mutate into deadly Hipbies, conduits for Flower Power from the Nega-Negaverse and mindless vectors for Pax viral outbreak.

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Pax Commandos are tasked with infiltrating key enemy facilities and repurposing them for pacification - especially bars.  Alcohol is the lifeblood of a population's capacity for violence, and control of the alcohol supply is the fastest means to convince enemies to defect.

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Defecting and converted members of the pacified population are immediately brainwashed and conscripted into the ranks of the Fun Police militia, dressed in reflective uniforms of bright orange for maximum visibility and placed under the authority of trained a Pax Occupation Officer.  It's the job of these collaborators to maintain Pacifism in the general population and prevent Fun of any kind until the A.N.U.S. is lifted.

Re: The A.N. Pax Corps

PostPosted: Mon Apr 02, 2012 9:27 pm
by Zupponn
Haha!  Awesome!  May I suggest that all Fun Police be relieved of one eye?

Re: The A.N. Pax Corps

PostPosted: Mon Apr 02, 2012 9:32 pm
by stubby
Zupponn wrote:Haha!  Awesome!  May I suggest that all Fun Police be relieved of one eye?

Ha, awesome.  I don't think I have any one-eyed peaches, so I'll have to convert them to a yellow force first.

Also, Iwas just considering the Fun Police's natural weakness:  the Rule of Fudge (obviously).  The best thing for an occupied people stuck in the A.N.U.S. is a Fudge Pax strategy. Now I just need to figure out how to build a Fudge-based resistance faction... this may give me a new use for all these Chewbaccas.

Re: The A.N. Pax Corps

PostPosted: Mon Apr 02, 2012 9:42 pm
by Colette
Haha stubby, between this and Fedonuker and whatnot we can always rely on you for some humor.

Maybe send some of these guys to the Third Alliance, and "teach" them a lesson?

Re: The A.N. Pax Corps

PostPosted: Tue Apr 03, 2012 6:01 am
by Bragallot
Taking alcohol away? Is there any better way to stir a violent revolution? Ah well, silly peaches.

Re: The A.N. Pax Corps

PostPosted: Tue Apr 03, 2012 10:19 am
by Whiteagle
stubby wrote:I found a place that was clearancing Star Wars army builder sets super cheap (like $1-$3 each) so I bought a buttload of them.

...Stubby, I am soo Jelly...

Re: The A.N. Pax Corps

PostPosted: Tue Apr 03, 2012 11:17 am
by stubby
Bragallot wrote:Taking alcohol away? Is there any better way to stir a violent revolution? Ah well, silly peaches.

Not taking it away!  Taking control of its distribution.  You can still get the alcohol, but you have to get it from the occupying forces.

Re: The A.N. Pax Corps

PostPosted: Tue Apr 03, 2012 11:46 am
by tymon555
There should be free alcohol everywhere. In appropriate ration it would stir a revolution. Surely.

Re: The A.N. Pax Corps

PostPosted: Tue Apr 03, 2012 2:13 pm
by mgb519
They should only provide cheap alcohol which tastes like crap and has less alcohol content than a teaspoon of vanilla extract. Also, they should threaten cookie cluster bombings in extreme circumstances.

Re: The A.N. Pax Corps

PostPosted: Tue Apr 03, 2012 3:36 pm
by Ex_Bajir
MY EYES THEY BURN!

Re: The A.N. Pax Corps

PostPosted: Tue Apr 03, 2012 4:21 pm
by stubby
mgb519 wrote:They should only provide cheap alcohol which tastes like crap and has less alcohol content than a teaspoon of vanilla extract. Also, they should threaten cookie cluster bombings in extreme circumstances.

I was thinking more like fruity girl-drink-drunk drinks.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8C4TGGtPzBU

Re: The A.N. Pax Corps

PostPosted: Tue Apr 03, 2012 5:08 pm
by Bragallot
stubby wrote:
Bragallot wrote:Taking alcohol away? Is there any better way to stir a violent revolution? Ah well, silly peaches.

Not taking it away!  Taking control of its distribution.  You can still get the alcohol, but you have to get it from the occupying feces.


Wait a minute, are you telling me shops and caf├ęs are trying to subjugate us into peace? I knew those bastards couldn't be trusted! Someone get the pitchforks!

Re: The A.N. Pax Corps

PostPosted: Tue Apr 03, 2012 5:13 pm
by NapalmKing
These guys look kick ass and the fact that all they do is pacify people is unfortunate.

Re: The A.N. Pax Corps

PostPosted: Tue Apr 03, 2012 7:19 pm
by Scottsman
NapalmKing wrote:These guys look kick ass and the fact that all they do is pacify people is unfortunate.

Only? Pacifism is the worst disease known to man. It can wipe out entire armies if left unchecked, with more destructive ability then the bloody flux or leprosy. Should the A.N.U.S. demand it, it can remove an entire armies ability to fight. They only pacify in the same way any other army only turns people into little red chunks. God forbid a hipbie springs up.

Re: The A.N. Pax Corps

PostPosted: Wed Apr 04, 2012 1:13 pm
by IVhorseman
Pack that fudge right in the A.N.U.S.!

Do their guns double as shields, or do they just grant cover? Even they're too flimsy to act as either, they look cool as all hell.