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Poniys vs. Scavs

PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2012 3:24 pm
by Silverdream
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Twilight Sparkley, Flutterdie and Applesmack along with a friendship squad of redneck poniys are sent to study the indigenous culture and possibly conquer and enslave them.

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The indigenous culture is a jungle scav group known as the "Stoned Crows".

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They outnumber and surround the poniys.

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Twilight Sparkley attempts a bring-it-to-life spell on an old AA gun.

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However, it kills Flutterdie.

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The redneck Poniys use their farming talents to move the shrubbery into strategic places, effectively making the scavs overwhelming numbers useless.

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The scavs, both respecting and fearing the shrubbery clutter up. If only that kamikaze poniy were still alive.

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The razgrizzlies are forced to go over the BURP.

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And a Scav and poniy are locked in mortal coil.

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The poniys gang up on the scav, but he survives their underpowered attacks.

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Applesmack and another redneck poniy fail their skill rolls.

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Twilight crushes the scavs with a giant piece of fungi.

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The razgrizzlies continue to climb the burp.

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A lone scav emerges from the fungi.

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And a redneck poniy is killed.

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Applesmack bucks a scav to death.

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And these two gang up on a scav, but their bucks do nothing.

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Twilight blasts a scav in the brain.

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The scav attacks the blue redneck poniy.

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And this is the damage roll.

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A dungan divebombs the other redneck poniy.

Applesmack and the other redneck are totally useless.

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Even Twilight's magic bolt is a failure.

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A scav avenges his fallen brothers and sisters.

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And that is when I quit. In my experience, poniys need to be beef'd up. In this battle, the heroic feats were the only successes. If I had more kamikaze or horny poniys, perhaps they would have done better.

Re: Poniys vs. Scavs

PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2012 3:38 pm
by stubby
Huh, I didn't realize the MLP toys were so small.  I thought they'd be 2" and get the extra hit point, that would have made them a lot sturdier.  The last MLP toys I saw were my sisters' collections back in the eighties. They were much bigger, they could stomp minifigs easily.

Re: Poniys vs. Scavs

PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2012 3:46 pm
by Silverdream
stubby wrote:Huh, I didn't realize the MLP toys were so small.  I thought they'd be 2" and get the extra hit point, that would have made them a lot sturdier.  The last MLP toys I saw were my sisters' collections back in the eighties. They were much bigger, they could stomp minifigs easily.


I'm using the blind bags rather than mcdonald's or the expensive playset penises. I could also alternatively buy a 2000$ Doctor Whooves plushies and stomp everything with time and space.

Re: Poniys vs. Scavs

PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2012 4:02 pm
by stubby
Actually, considering the ridiculous size of their giant pwny noggins, they probably really are Size 2". I'd up their base stats to make them equivalent to a standard Horse with two inches of CC attacks rather than one:

Pwnie
Skill: 1d6
Move: 10"
Armor: 4 (x2")
CP: 10

Kick/Bite: With any combination of kicks / bites / headbutts, a pwny can deliver two CC attacks to the front or one double-strength CC attack to the rear.
Front attacks (x2): UR2, Dmg 1d6, Rng CC, cannot be used to Parry
Rear attack (x1): UR3, Dmg 2d6, Rng CC, cannot be used to Parry

Extra abilities for Horny / Kamikaze / etc. are the same.

Re: Poniys vs. Scavs

PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2012 7:47 pm
by Colette
When I have enough time to actively participate here again, I will have the Trattorians declare total war on the pwnies and will launch a total genocide campaign to wipe out every last one from this and the nearest five galaxies.

Re: Poniys vs. Scavs

PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2012 8:54 pm
by Whiteagle
Colette wrote:When I have enough time to actively participate here again, I will have the Trattorians declare total war on the pwnies and will launch a total genocide campaign to wipe out every last one from this and the nearest five galaxies.

I would strongly suggest against this...

Re: Poniys vs. Scavs

PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2012 10:53 pm
by Colette
Whiteagle wrote:
Colette wrote:When I have enough time to actively participate here again, I will have the Trattorians declare total war on the pwnies and will launch a total genocide campaign to wipe out every last one from this and the nearest five galaxies.

I would strongly suggest against this...


These pwnies are primitive with little firepower. What threat do they pose to us? If anything it's anorakish for beating up such a weak and dickless menace.

Re: Poniys vs. Scavs

PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2012 11:55 pm
by Silverdream
We know very little about the poniys, which is why we should send a grillion briktoid to blow up wherever they come from or live or whatever.

Re: Poniys vs. Scavs

PostPosted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 12:41 am
by Bragallot
Colette wrote:When I have enough time to actively participate here again, I will have the Trattorians declare total war on the pwnies and will launch a total genocide campaign to wipe out every last one from this and the nearest five galaxies.


Make that sixty-nine.

Re: Poniys vs. Scavs

PostPosted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 5:45 am
by Apollyon
stubby wrote:Huh, I didn't realize the MLP toys were so small.  I thought they'd be 2" and get the extra hit point, that would have made them a lot sturdier.  The last MLP toys I saw were my sisters' collections back in the eighties. They were much bigger, they could stomp minifigs easily.


And you could comb their hair!

Re: Poniys vs. Scavs

PostPosted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 9:31 am
by Theblackdog
I'd suggest building the pwnies a robot attack unicorn, especially if you're going up against vehicles in the future.

Re: Poniys vs. Scavs

PostPosted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 11:33 am
by Predator
Whiteagle wrote:
Colette wrote:When I have enough time to actively participate here again, I will have the Trattorians declare total war on the pwnies and will launch a total genocide campaign to wipe out every last one from this and the nearest five galaxies.

I would strongly suggest against this...

Your death will be slow and painfull...after which we befriend you.

Also, Thanks for the stats stubby. They'll probably work well. (Profesionally stubby drawn stat card for the supplements section? :?: ... :?:  :?:  :?: )

Re: Poniys vs. Scavs

PostPosted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 11:51 am
by Whiteagle
Silverdream wrote:We know very little about the poniys, which is why we should send a grillion briktoid to blow up wherever they come from or live or whatever.

Again, strongly suggesting against this, as programs of Briktoid Automata are a parody of Internet Gamer culture...
Thus, a large majority of them will side with the Pwnies.

Re: Poniys vs. Scavs

PostPosted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 1:01 pm
by Predator
Whiteagle wrote:
Silverdream wrote:We know very little about the poniys, which is why we should send a grillion briktoid to blow up wherever they come from or live or whatever.

Again, strongly suggesting against this, as programs of Briktoid Automata are a parody of Internet Gamer culture...
Thus, a large majority of them will side with the Pwnies.

My faction will send you recources immediately! A fleet of cargo ships is on it's way.