Battle in the Ruins: A comedy of errors.

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Battle in the Ruins: A comedy of errors.

Postby Scratch » Sat Mar 29, 2014 11:54 pm

Or: The reasons why to not have a battle with half the units in heavy armor and only one two handed weapon amongst them.

So, sometime last summer, I had a battle with one of my best buddies who also plays Brikwars, (although he's much more of a gamer now) and we had a quick pickup game.
Ahem [lore] Calis and his Crimson Eagle detatchment have come to liberate some ruins from the Orks, (un)fortunately for him, the Orkish leader, Our Lady of Vengeance, has arrived to inspect the vital border fortress. [/lore]

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After he spent an hour setting up the terrain, we were finally able to set up armies to begin the battle.

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My team was the Red Company, commanded by Calis the Crimson Eagle, he had a Darkspear phlanx on this side.

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And the Redcloaks provided mobile cover for the Dragon-bowmen on the otherside.

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He had Our Lady of Vengeance as his hero, supplimented with some Ork Grunts and the Avatar's Blackguard.

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The Greatbowman had some hugeass arrows and one explosive arrow.

Turn 1
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My bowmen get first blood, killing a crossbowork through the ruins.

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My dudes move up, and Calis dismounts.

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Our Lady of Vengeance uses her feat to leap off the tower into the frey.

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She lands flat on her ass and looks silly.

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This guy loads his fire arrow.

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and somehow manages not to hit either group of clumped up infantry, killing the lone man out or the group.

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After some serious OOC bargining, I take his hero shamefully hostage and perpare to protect her from rescue attempts.

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The Redcloaks move up, they have nearly gotten their fat asses to the door at this point, also, an ork falls and breaks his neck in the bushes.

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Maybe I killed him, I'm not sure.

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Archers begin to scale the walls, my hero climbs back on his horse to get a bit higher

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He then also climbs the wall.

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He is now the first to reach the interior of the fort.

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He manages not to get instakilled by the spear that was shot out of the greatbow.

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Then the crossbowork knocks him on to the ground.

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This guy can't get through my hero's armor even when he's prone.
Last edited by Scratch on Sun Mar 30, 2014 12:01 am, edited 1 time in total.
The only unflawed system is Lego System.
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Colette wrote:You're free to make your own map from scratch, however.

All you have to do is flatten his head.
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Re: Battle in the Ruins: A comedy of errors.

Postby Scratch » Sat Mar 29, 2014 11:57 pm

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The Darkspears pose for their next album cover in front of the prone Lady.

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She responds by either shoving them, or going BOO to scare them off.

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Then she books it

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This guy gets killed, I'm not really sure how.

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There's a roadblock at the doorway when the lead redcloak can't get his plume under the doorway.

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The spearmen stab her in the back, failing to damage her.

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Calis stands back up.

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Not sure why I took this picture, this guy has the Lady's sword.

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The Greatarcher isn't so great, and lodges a spear in the masonry.

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Incompotence runs rampent in the Ork ranks, as this guy drops his bow like a dumbass.

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This guy almost lights himself on fire with his stupidity.

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With a serious Matrix flip, Our Lady of Vengeance grabs her sword back.

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and proceeds to slice the throat of the bowman holding it.

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Then she gets cornered for a third time.

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Someone finally gets through the door, it seems.

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My hero picks up the Ork

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and breaks him over the piller.

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This guy picks up the dead ork's bow.

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More failure amongst the Orkish smallfolk.

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This guy lit himself on fire and then failed two skill rolls of 2.
The only unflawed system is Lego System.
Zupponn wrote:
Colette wrote:You're free to make your own map from scratch, however.

All you have to do is flatten his head.
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Re: Battle in the Ruins: A comedy of errors.

Postby Scratch » Sat Mar 29, 2014 11:58 pm

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This Mace is parried by a dinky little sword.

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Making up for her subordinate's immense failings, Our Lady of Vengeance cuts three heads off in one stroke.

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You get three shots of it because it's the only sucessful feat so far this game.

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Her look practically states "Come at me bro"

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Then she steals a horse.

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The Bowman again fails to kill anything.

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These guys start to wake up and do shit.

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The redcloaks are almost done filing one by one through the door.

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The last one outside tries to take out the Lady, but is taken out himself.

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This guy uses the sharp end of his bow to disarm the ork.

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Orks be failin' yo.

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Well, besides the Lady I mean.

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She's taking out Reds left right and center.

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Calis continues to not die while surrounded.

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His buddies are catching up to him, but they arn't too helpful.
The only unflawed system is Lego System.
Zupponn wrote:
Colette wrote:You're free to make your own map from scratch, however.

All you have to do is flatten his head.
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Re: Battle in the Ruins: A comedy of errors.

Postby Scratch » Sat Mar 29, 2014 11:59 pm

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Sorta hard to tell, but she just stabbed him in the gut with a spear, without turning around.

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Then she kills a spearman by throwing the same spear.

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The Bicyclops finally gets into the action and immediately fails to do anything.

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Failure, Etc etc etc

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The Lady catches the Bull's sword in her hand, stopping the blow.

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He then gets shot in the face.

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This guy crit-fails and loses his balance.

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Looks like he sprained his ankle or something.

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The Lady approaches the prone archer

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She picks him up by the scruff of his neck...

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And Gorily evicerates him.

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Calis maces off one head of the Bicyclops.

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The last archer gets sniped in the neck.

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The grey ork misses a stab.

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This Blackguard prepares his ebony flintlock.

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More useless but cool looking blows are exchanged.

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These guys are cornered too.

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From the hill, the Lady proclaims "Valient foemen, submit and you will only be taken prisoner."

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They ponder it for a moment... "Fuck it, we surrender"

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The three surviving human figs are taken hostage, and the orks reign victorious!

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Here's where the Lady took out about 80% of the Red Company on her own.

Well, that game took too many pictures, and had too many rounds of little action, the upside was that the Lady proved her epicness outside of that first turn failure, and Calis proved to be a compotent hero as well.
The only unflawed system is Lego System.
Zupponn wrote:
Colette wrote:You're free to make your own map from scratch, however.

All you have to do is flatten his head.
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Re: Battle in the Ruins: A comedy of errors.

Postby Bragallot » Sun Mar 30, 2014 3:33 am

Heh. The setting and figs were awesome, so is the hero rampage, only it does look like the lady only managed it because the others let her. Heroes tend to fall when alone and surrounded by figs that know what they're doing.
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Re: Battle in the Ruins: A comedy of errors.

Postby Bluefog » Tue Apr 01, 2014 4:46 am

I would say personally, the Lady was played maybe a bit too aggressively, but then again... :sparta:
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