He looks upon his 9-ringed kingdom and smiles, digging his wretched teeth into the traitors in his jaws.
Hell's nine rings are filled with sinners in various states of torment.
The stone face of violence pours blood while those who committed suicide are trapped as trees.
Heretics are burned in their tombs.
The wrathful strangle each other in the river Styx, and a demon gleefully prods those on the shores back in.
The greedy are forced to push boulders against each other.
Three-headed Cerberus munches on the gluttonous.
The lusty are blown in circles eternally by a giant stone... face.
The first ring, Limbo, is peaceful by comparison. Here the virtuous non-believers and unbaptized babies mull about, entertained by a skeleton band.
There's a built-in dice tower. Dice go in the stone mouth of Fraud and pop out of Greed, smashing the greedy.
Damage was rampant as people stood farther and farther back from the table, launching dice into the mouth (or attempting to). And the river of blood that cascades from Violence to Wrath is backlit with LEDs, giving it a nice glow that was not kind to the camera.
Sinners must collect skulls for the glory of Satan! Killing someone gets you their skull, but if they have a spare skull they can hand that over instead. If you still have your head after dying, you respawn on level (2D4). Rolling two D4's is most likely to give you 5, Wrath. So most units respawned in a river of blood, ready for more killing.
If you made it up to level 9, you could turn in your skulls for Bennies. These were used for everything, from extra armor to extra distance.
After drafting a unit you picked a sin to accompany him/her. The available sins:
Lied about his virginity
Didn’t close his eyes when someone was saying Grace one time
Didn't respect his parents
Played Magic The Gathering
Listened to Heavy Metal music
Used birth control
Called someone a fool
Let a dog drink holy water
Kept a Hebrew slave more than 6 years
Wiped her butt with an American flag
Once said “God darn it”
Played with a Ouija Board
Tolerant of other religions
Has a tattoo
Plowed a field with an ox and a donkey
Wore polyester clothes
Trimmed off his sideburns
Entered a church after menstruating
Laughed at a Pearl Harbor joke
Believed in evolution
Flipped off the Pope
Donated money to Planned Parenthood
Vaccinated her kid even after Sharon warned her not to
Didn’t donate to that TV preacher
That one fetish
Twerked at a wedding
Also available in the draft were a few piles of skulls, dudes carrying ladders, and a single demon who decided to have some fun.
We were on a tight schedule, so we didn't get many pictures of the battle itself. Here's a brief run-down of what happened in vaguely chronological order.
Everyone started on Ring 1: Limbo and immediately started slaughtering babies for their precious skulls.
The skeleton band was next.
Only one player took a ladder-man, and he started making use of it to leapfrog up the rings.
We started attacking each other, and people respawned at random rings.
Battles were had on every ring, especially as we started respawning directly behind each other. In one case someone was cut down and immediately respawned in the exact same spot.
At this point we were positive that we were just trading skulls and making no progress towards a resolution. A brave soul bathes in the waterfall of blood and convenes with Satan. He succeeds, transforming all skulls into bennies. The endgame has been forced upon us.
Armed with piles of Bennies, the battles are now lethal and outrageous. People are using Bennies for movement to rocket around the rings, and 61 damage hits are commonplace (matched by 62 armor). One by one we are eliminated until only three units remain. Two of them battle it out atop the tower, using up all of their Bennies in an epic final showdown. One succeeds, but finds his final opponent racing up the tower to catch him. She is using Bennies to move faster, but still has a massive horde. They meet on Ring 8, and the Benniless peasant is blasted into oblivion by 138 damage.
Satan was inspired by https://www.flickr.com/photos/deathlyha ... 28963@N20/
Cerberus was inspired by https://i.redd.it/2eubw0h8e7uz.jpg
I'm currently resetting the map, and a massive forum battle will be had! Keep an eye out on Thursday or Friday for sign-ups.