"Yes, but we are also killing Americans, too"

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"Yes, but we are also killing Americans, too"

Postby Tzan » Sun Jul 11, 2010 2:16 pm

A conversation an american game developer has with a russian customs guy.

"Background: Criterion Sound Designer Ben Minto went to Russia to record the russian voices he needed for "Black". When asking for a 1-day-visa, this happened:

"Hi, can I have a Visa to visit Russia please, I need the fast 1 day Visa."

"When are you going?"

"In 2 days."

"You have a flight booked?"


"You have an invitation?"

"Yup, here you go..."

"How long are you going for?"

"4 days."

"Why are you going?"

"To record Russian voices."

This turned out to not be the most politically sensitive thing to say. It seems the week before, some British agents had supposedly been caught spying and exchanging data via a fake rock. Not very Black (being more covert than overt) and not very good for me, as it turned out.

"Record voices?"

"Yes, I need to capture some Russian voices for a project I am working on."

"One moment."

Fortunately, this time I only had to wait 5 minutes. Unfortunately, it now seemed that I had to have a special interview. I was now talking to someone who looked very serious and important.

"You are going to capture Russians?"

"No, I'm a sound designer, I have a script and I need to record these lines in Russian, using genuine Russian talent."

"And what are you using it for?"

"It's for a video game I'm working on."

(I should have probably stuck to the line, "a project I'm working on.")

"A video game? Can I see the script?"



"This is a game in which you kill Russians?"

"Erm... well, they're sort of generic Eastern European."

"You are killing people who speak Russian?"

"Er... yes, but we are also killing Americans too."

"Ah... ok."
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Postby DarthBrik » Sun Jul 11, 2010 5:26 pm


-Defcon, Coperal
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Postby Warhead » Sun Jul 11, 2010 5:58 pm

I know, they never go to this bother to record British voices, as American TV and video games will testify. "LAwk'sA'LAwdy Guvna' be I ever so 'umble yar honour..." etc, etc.

I say, spy. Totally.
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Postby Almighty Benny » Mon Jul 12, 2010 4:24 pm

must have been even harder for the guys working on Modern Warfare 2

"yeah, we need a bunch of screaming Russian sound bytes. There will be a lot of American children playing this game and they'll be gunning down civilians and tourists in a Russian airport with heavy machine guns. They aren't easily fooled, so we'll need the screams to sound authentic. No, we'll only need a 1 day Visa. I don't even think we'll be leaving the airport once we get there."
I said "no" to drugs, but they just wouldn't listen...
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