The Fight Before Saturnalia - FINISHED

Like a Dewey Decimal system of destruction

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Theblackdog
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The Fight Before Saturnalia - FINISHED

Post by Theblackdog » Mon Nov 29, 2010 10:54 pm

Head over to Day 0 to sign up!
Day 1
Day 2
Day 3
Day 4
Day 5
Day 6
Finale

Intro
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'twas the night before Saturnalia, and all through their fort
the Dimmies prepared a quite violent retort
to Santa's insult. For he'd sent clone-brand toys
to bad little girls and bad little boys.

They waited on the ramparts, spears sharpened and drawn
(except for the bohrok, which parked on the lawn).
A flak gun was placed on the rooftop with care
in the hope that St. Nicholas soon would be there.


Meanwhile Santa's sleigh flew high over the ground
as the jolly old elf made his annual rounds.
But just as he descended with his heavy load
his escorting fighters were seen to explode.


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The elves on the sleigh were all taken aback;
they didn't think Santa'd be under attack.
They screamed as they fell through the tall, starry sky:
"Merry Saturnalia toAAAAAAAAGH!"
"AIEEE! WE'RE ALL GONNA DIEEEEEEE!"


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Minus one engine, the sleigh tumbled down
to land at the edge of a small, sleepy town.
Without a jet engine, and its tank of gas.
But Santa just wanted to kick Dimmy ass.

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Before he could start, though, a new sound was heard
A hovercraft, moving along as it whirred
to stop just by Santa, and Commander Black
raised both hands as the elves prepared to attack.

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"St. Nick, I knew tonight you'd be in town
but I didn't think those dimmies could shoot you down.
I've found your left engine. It fell right by me
and I'll give it right back (for a nominal fee)."

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"... or no fee at all, 'cause I'll shoot off your junk
if you don't give my engine back RIGHT NOW, PUNK!"
"Hey, cool it, St. Nick. You would pay us to fight
'cause the Dimmies aren't the only ones in town tonight."

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Santa looked around, and the whole town was packed
with all sorts of enemies. The deck was stacked.
"OK", said Santa Claus. "Here's what we'll do.
Shoot the gun, get the fuel and the engine, pay you..."

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"All I need is a present," Black said, "for my son.
Lord knows, if you die, he won't have any fun.
That toy robot will work, that one there in the back.
Bring it to my fort once we start our attack."

"And now, he said, "I'm off." And he turned to depart.
But Claus didn't want to wait for the shooting to start.
He hefted his bazooka, and looked out at the neighborhood.
Said Santa, "Ho Ho Ho! HAVE YOU BEEN GOOD?"


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Alright, NOW head over to the Day 0 thread to sign up.
Last edited by Theblackdog on Tue Dec 28, 2010 3:05 pm, edited 8 times in total.
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OneEye589
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Post by OneEye589 » Mon Nov 29, 2010 11:04 pm

Yay, you're the first person to actually make their thread correctly. Thank you.

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Theblackdog
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Post by Theblackdog » Wed Dec 01, 2010 1:09 pm

And we are in gametime.
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Theblackdog
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Post by Theblackdog » Wed Dec 01, 2010 11:40 pm

Day 1 is up.
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Robot Monkey
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Post by Robot Monkey » Sat Dec 04, 2010 7:13 pm

Go Robot Uprising! This looks to be a great battle.
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Theblackdog
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Post by Theblackdog » Tue Dec 28, 2010 3:05 pm

...and we're done.

Thanks to all who participated, especially if you actually, you know, participated.
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Warhead
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Post by Warhead » Tue Dec 28, 2010 5:30 pm

I expected more from Santa to be honest. Ever think of upgrading to MFS?
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Theblackdog
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Post by Theblackdog » Tue Dec 28, 2010 11:37 pm

Warhead wrote:I expected more from Santa to be honest. Ever think of upgrading to MFS?
What, you missed Mega-Claus at the end?
Santa, Manly Fucking Santa, what would the difference be, really? The problem wasn't his own strength, it's that he was heavily outnumbered from the start, and too far from his allies. He put up a good fight but the end result was more or less inevitable.
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Warhead
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Post by Warhead » Wed Dec 29, 2010 12:59 am

Yeah, he was ice-skating uphill in this fight.

The difference? I'd have to go with Beer, Bitches and Brutality. That and the ability to put the head in things (even enemy attacks) without any serious harm to himself.

Mega Claws was good but needed pincers, and to survive longer than his own turn.
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Zahru II
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I kinda like it if the lady's dominant...
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Post by Zahru II » Wed Dec 29, 2010 1:51 am

I maybe if he could summon swarms of coal monsters for the naughty little enemies...
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