WHAT HAPPENED BEFORE THE CAPTURE, RECORDED ON THE SHUTTLE’S ONBOARD VIDEO SYSTEM
Admiral: Slight stealth is enabled, don’t set it too invisibility or else we won’t have enough fuel to make it. Shuttle preparing for interstellar, engineers, bang up the miniature neutrina reactor so we can get away as fast as we can.
Radar Operator: Sir, hundreds, maybe thousands of enemy contacts. They really mean business, I guess despite all security measures they still know about our cargo. Warn them!
Admiral: Gunners! Fire all weapons and take evasive action! Order the fleet to attack and hold off the attackers!
Radar Operator: Incoming! Fighter contacts and missiles, brace for impact and prepare counterattack!
*Immortals and Tyronians warp in and an epic space battle with tons of laser bangs and explosions starts*
President Austin: So now, the Athenia dreadnought will have enough weapons to destroy the...
General: *rushes in* Mr. President, we are being attacked, all fighters have been launched and guns blazing! We must evacuate you now!
President Austin: I'm assuming the smaller shuttle inside the shuttle's docking bay is prepped to go? It’s simply a matter of evacuating all of us and slipping through, I suppose.
General: The shuttle has already been launched, it’s destroyed about 7 Immortal warships currently but it’s on a suicide mission, we can’t call it back at this point!
President Austin: Damn, this’ll be trickier than I thought. General Yadlin, broadcast an encrypted transmission, initiate Operation Regresar, Operation Hellmutt, and Operation Downfall. If you other people don’t know what I’m talking about, then too bad, it’s classified. Can’t this damn shuttle just fly out of this mess? It cost a lot of money to build, the least it could do is save our lives.
General: The Immortals and Tyronians have us completely surrounded, except for a huge hole in their sensors and defenses. It’s rapidly closing, already it’s too small for any of our larger spaceships to fly through. We have launched everything we have, the only vehicle left is an advanced, spaceworthy Pegasus helicopter. But, unfortunately, it can only fit three people. So far sensors indicate that the Tyronians are already launching boarding pods, we don’t have much time.
President Austin: Well then, get us to the damn hangar!
General: I’m sorry, but we must transport only the three most important people, General Yadlin, Vice President Nungy, and President Austin. I apologize, but the copta’ can’t hold any more.
Speaker of the House: Dickhead, you promised we’d be safe!
Secretary of Defense: Nyphilian dickheads! I’ll spill all I know to the immortals to aid them against you, I might not know about those classified operations but I know much else!
National Security Advisor: In this darkest time, we should not be treasonous. Regardless, I agree Austin is a dickhead for all of his plainly false promises. He promised Nyphilis shall never fall, and now it is destroyed. He promised to execute pedonuker, yet the pedo is still alive. He promised to fend off all immortal shitbags from entering this empire, yet they are pouring in by the thousands. True, we have cost the immortals much, temporarily successfully captured an immortal core and researched it, and damaging them so that they are forced to rebuild, thereby buying much, much time for the anti-immortals to amass armies. We have become the first to fall in the Immortal’s breakout, which is a bittersweet honor. But at least for now, we must stand together and fight!
President Austin: I will not go. I instead want to Secretary of State Aletta to go for me.
General: You can’t let your crushes and romance get in this! This is a national security, no wait, national SURVIVAL issue! As president, you must go!
President: I must delete all encrypted and classified data relating to the aforementioned classified operations everywhere in the Nyphilian Empire. However, this requires lots of passcodes, and I don’t have the time to tell them all to someone if I want to evacuate. I’ll stay behind.
General: By law, you must leave now, Mr. President. Get into the damn helicopter.
President Austin: I declare Aletta the president of the Nyphilian Empire then.
General: You’re violating the 22nd amendment to the Nyphilian constitution! You learned presidential succession in 5th grade, the presidency would automatically pass on to your vice president upon your death or incapacitation!
President Austin: Screw the constitution. I picked her for a reason, and that has nothing to do with what the tabloids are talking about. She handles diplomatic relations with other nations, I’ve seen her wince in those cabinet meetings at my foreign policies, many of which I regret now. She suggested many ideas and resolutions, which I promptly ignored. For instance, she stated that since Nyphilians are banned from the hill due to that dickhead pedonuker’s actions, I should ignore it and ban access to it. I ignored her, to our detriment. Every time, she always suggested an option, a better one than mines retrospectively. I’ll leave her in charge, and hopefully this enables Nyphilis to learn from its mistakes. I will die so that the empire may live, that’s the point. We shall never again make such rash, stupid decisions. The hole is closing fast, godspeed! Make it through while there’s time. *Watches helicopter zoom away past the stars, undetected and unattacked, to its destination*
5 minutes later...
President Austin: Last file, deleted!
General: Incoming boarding parties!!!!
President Austin: There easy to kill, but they’re coming in the thousands! Our security forces and our other crew and officials are way outnumbered, may I assume we’re going to die?
General: Pretty accurate, I suppose.
*End of my report, beginning of Krus’s*
5 hours later...
President Aletta: Apologies to any remaining survivors of the Nyphilian empire, I regret to announce the LSD vision was a cover-up for the real world. I have decided to inform you against the former president wishes, Nyphilis has actually been destroyed, everything that is destroyed is truly destroyed. Everybody dead is dead. Former President Austin chose to hide this disaster in order to maintain order, but as everyone knows he's a complete moron who knows nothing of public or foreign policy. The Nyphilian empire will continue to exist, but acknowledging Ogel96's point, I take this apocalypse as a chance to rebuild, a chance to redeem, as the great flood of Noah destroyed all antediluvian objects and people but purified the Earth. To all the enslaved, to all in hiding, please hold on, we will return soon