Natalya wrote:@Warhead:
iProducts are bullshit and I don't even like beer.
Natalya wrote:iProducts are bullshit
Natalya wrote:iProducts are bullshit
Natalya wrote:iProducts are bullshit


Hello, and my name is Steve Jobs, CEO of Apple Incorporated. Have you ever heard of the TSOC? The Scythian Empire? The Assyrian Star Empire? All of their brilliant AI's were developed by us, here at planet Cupertino (Not Briktoid though, those are Microsoft and see how much success they're having?). We are the leaders of the computing industry, and are currently the most valuable corporation in the Brikverse, beating out Royal $hell, Googel, and AMScythia. Every corner and citizen of the brikverse uses our superior products in both military and civilian fields. Now, I'd like to introduce you all to some of the mind-blowing innovations we have come up with recently.

First is our core of human enforcers. Consisting of enthusiastic college interns who want to do more than peddling iPads at our stores, they keep our AI units in line and supervise battles. They are led by my trusted advisor Tim Cook in his suit of [reinforced] recycled-aluminum armor.

The majority of our forces, however, are made up of MacBots. The iBot Commander in the front is enhanced with command abilities and leads the other MacBots. Trailing him are normal MacBots with built-in lasers, then armor MacBot Pros armed with a rocket each, and finally a MacBot Air in the back.
Special Ability: At the beginning of its turn a MacBot may declare that it is going to Risk the Spinning Beachball. It rolls a d6, and with a roll of 3 or higher it may take 2 actions that turn. If it fails, its processors take a spinning beach ball and it shuts down, losing its action for that turn and taking an action next turn to reboot. Upon a second spinning-beachball the processors cause a size 1 explosion.

Additionally, in order to protect our Scythian factories from protestors and labor unionists we have created an AI tank, powered with the processor of a single Macbook Pro. While it is manned with a human gunner to ensure it does not go rogue, the AI can handle itself on the field of battle and can easily dispatch enemies such as Microsoft box-dropships and Google's wizards of evuul.

A small sample of our military might. At this rate, Microsoft will not only be kicked off the S&P 500 but from the very brikverse itself.