Dungeons And Dragons

[Tzan]

Its ok General, you gave me a chance to use that image, thanks.
I've been holding it for a year.

[The Shadowscythe]

Hoboy.jpeg

Here we go.

>Been forever GM for about 4 years between a Battletech campaign and a more recent Halo based campaign.
>Finally get to play D&D, after 8 years of tabletop, I have never played it.
>Instantly despise the maths/long winded char gen.
>Roll up a bog standard Human Barbarian.
>Notthesharpesttoolintheshed.mp4
>Go maundering about for a bit.
>Get hired by local Baron to rescue his son from some kinda evil wizard.
>GO FORTH TO THE WIZZARDS DUNGEN!

>Dare you enter my magical realm?

>WIZZARDS! NO SENSE OF RIGHT OR WRONG!

>Finally emerge with Barons son, no wizzard kill though.
>Kid under some type of glamour spell, sees all alignments as reversed.
>Have to hog tie and bind kid, carrying him on my shoulder

>I AM FRED! BARBARIAN CHILDMINDER!
>TREAT CHILD LIKE TROLL!
>BEAT CHILD UNTIL HAPPY!
>BEAT CHILD IF SAD!
>IF CHILD HUNGRY, FILL WITH MEAT! MEAT MAKE CHILD MAN!
>WASH CHILD LIKE TROLL!

Commence dumping kid, still hog tied, face first into local river.

>Get the kid back to the castle.
>Local Baron outside castle with troops, saying castle was stormed by evil wizzard and we had to get in there and kill him by a secret entrance only the baron would know about.

>But now Fred knows about the secret entrance.

>Therefore Fred is a Baron.

>GET OUT OF WAY OF FRED, BARON FRED.

>BARON FRED THE BARBARIAN CHILDMINDER!

<<Insert Metal Gear Solid style stealth section here>>

>Get inside the castle
>Kill some Orcs
>Kill a Troll
>So good so far
>Then one of the Orcs calls Fred an Orc
>Fred stops in his tracks.
>Fred is not an Orc, Fred is Fred, Baron Fred, Baron Fred the Barbarian childminder.
>Orc says he is not an Orc
>Fred says he is not an Orc.
>Rest of partys faces as the LOWEST IN CHAR IN THE PARTY FIGURES OUT HE IS UNDER A GLAMOUR SPELL BEFORE EVERYONE ELSE THROUGH SHEER DUMB LUCK AND FORCE OF WILL.
>Join forces with former "Orcs" that turn out to be local malitia/castle gaurds.
>Fight off Gaurds that turned out to be Orcs.
>Evil Wizzard breaks into the castle.
>Only for Fred to jump down from the battlements and stab him.
>In the Throat.
>With a Greatsword.

>THIS IS HOW FRED WIZZARDS.

Exp totalled up, rewards given out - Fred blatantly stole the night.

God I wish I could play that char all the time, rather than just a one shot.

[Zupponn]

That was funny.  Fred Wizzins!

[knolli]

Great story with a even nicer twist. I have to remeber this birlliant application of the glamour spell. Maybe I can use it next time.

[Ben-Jammin]

>I AM FRED! BARBARIAN CHILDMINDER!
>TREAT CHILD LIKE TROLL!
>BEAT CHILD UNTIL HAPPY!
>BEAT CHILD IF SAD!
>IF CHILD HUNGRY, FILL WITH MEAT! MEAT MAKE CHILD MAN!
>WASH CHILD LIKE TROLL!

I truly lol'd at this.

[Arkbrik]

Alright.

>Gonna play DnD for the first time
>It's 4th ed, unaware of its reputation
>Puts some thought into making a nice old lady cleric, detailing her family and background etc.
>Time to roleplay, hooray!

DM: You are outside a ruined tower. You have come here to stop the goblins who have been stealing from the nearby town.
Me: (thinking) Killing goblins eh? Shouldn't take long. Then we go back to town as heroes and the actual campaign will start.

>We charge in
>We fight goblins
>For hours
>At midnight or so they are all dead

DM: Good, you've cleared out the first floor.

2nd session

>We go up the stairs
>More goblins
>There is a strange dotted square marked on the battlemap
>We fight
>And fight
>After too many hours we win
>Asks DM about square

DM: Oh, that was a trap but I forgot about it.

3rd session

>We go up the stairs
>Even more goblins
>FIght fight fight
>At long last they are dead
>Everyone finds magic weapons perfectly suited to their respective classes

Me: What? Why weren't the goblins using these weapons against us?
DM: Uh...
Me: And the goblins must have stolen these weapons from someone. Shouldn't we return them to their rightful owners?
DM: Uh...

[knolli]

>Gonna play DnD for the first time
>It's 4th ed, unaware of its reputation
>Puts some thought into making a nice old lady cleric, detailing her family and background etc.
>Time to roleplay, hooray!
[...]

Congratulation, you have found yourself a group of roll gamers. It can be fun once in a while, if you treat it more as a tactical tabletop that as a roleplay game. But we had this discussion several times already. Since then I have taken a look at some systems that focus on roleplaying and character interaction instead of endless rolling sprees.

[Whiteagle]

>Gonna play DnD for the first time
>It's 4th ed, unaware of its reputation
>Puts some thought into making a nice old lady cleric, detailing her family and background etc.
>Time to roleplay, hooray!
[...]

Congratulation, you have found yourself a group of roll gamers. It can be fun once in a while, if you treat it more as a tactical tabletop that as a roleplay game. But we had this discussion several times already. Since then I have taken a look at some systems that focus on roleplaying and character interaction instead of endless rolling sprees.

Might I suggest MSF High?

It's an online forum RP that takes place in the titular magical Highschool for Heros, a tropetastic setting placed in the orginal Mahou Galaxy.
I was just talking with one of the Moderators the other day and he mentioned how he'd like more roleplayers then fight grinders...

...And if all else fails, there are always the beautiful plant Borg women!

[Rev. Sylvanus]

I'm the DM in the majority of my playgroups.

Last year I ran fantasy campaign using GURPS (more detailed but also more flexible than DnD).

The party is adventuring to a town in the south, wandering through some woods. Come to a bridge taxed by Barbarian outlaws.

Knight, wizard, and dwarf mechanic stay in woods; female elf and female healer approach the bridge to talk the group out of a tax.

The women roll incredibly well for charisma-like checks; the Barbarians permit them to cross the bridge.

Once on the other side, the girls remember that they left their dudes stranded in the woods on the other side!

Dwarf Mechanic puts on his battlesuit and mangles the barbarians anyway.

With everyone across, the rest of the barbarian clan emerges from the woods (including a Hill Giant) and begin epic chase scene  

[Kalvinator]

Pictured that last part with this in background.- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MK6TXMsvgQg