Carrnevil 9's Mechanical Database

[IVhorseman]

I'm greatly enjoying this yellow mech, but something that strikes me is how femenine it looks. not at all a bad thing, but the entire mech looks like an angsty teenage girl tomboy. which would actually make the perfect pilot for this... throwing women into every single dangerous situation is stereotypically anime!

[Carrnevil9]

(Edited edit: This first section is directed at Piltogg.  Quoting him would have made this considerably more obvious)

While I'll admit that these are all incredibly well built, only 1/69 contains a minifig.  As for how they're built, mechs of this kind tend to rely very heavily on the pneumatic T junctions (The blue one's legs are nearly entirely composed of them.)  I'd also like to point out that many of them 'bend rules' as well.  Is using minifig hands against your rules?  
Legos are a medium that allow you to bend many rules without expressedly allowing it.  Is it OK to place a plate vertically between two nubs?  What about large POOPs?  what about pulling off minifig limbs?  Legos are a very end-justifies-the-means object.

(Final side note, the KK joints do have weight tolerences that can be exceeded, and all of my machines have taken a 'fatal' fall a couple times.  They aren't perfect.)

Edited side note to IV:
Yeah, the shy-girl-hiding-massive-weapon look was entirely on purpose.  You can make your machines flex their muscles and bare their teeth anytime.  Making it look innocent is hard.

Edited edit-reedited: Wow, that sounded a lot more snobbish that it should have.  Re-phrased out of disgust.

[Olothontor]

Oh my god I absolutely adore the third one there. It's got some sweet weaponry, and the armor rating on that thing can't exactly be low... now the only thing it needs is some anti-sniper shielding. And the dude who made it sooo needs to put up instructions somewhere

[DarkWolf]

Edited side note to IV:
Yeah, the shy-girl-hiding-massive-weapon look was entirely on purpose.  You can make your machines flex their muscles and bare their teeth anytime.  Making it look innocent is hard.

They're giant war machines, they aren't supposed to look innocent, they're supposed to look like they could rip your teeth out through your arse in the blink of an eye. I will admit that very little of my original creations look pretty to most, but they do look deadly, and that's the important part. And, on a competely random note, I'm going to preorder some of those IR control parts and motorize my IKE-3.

[Carrnevil9]

Edited side note to IV:
Yeah, the shy-girl-hiding-massive-weapon look was entirely on purpose.  You can make your machines flex their muscles and bare their teeth anytime.  Making it look innocent is hard.

They're giant war machines, they aren't supposed to look innocent, they're supposed to look like they could rip your teeth out through your arse in the blink of an eye. I will admit that very little of my original creations look pretty to most, but they do look deadly, and that's the important part. And, on a competely random note, I'm going to preorder some of those IR control parts and motorize my IKE-3.

Mechs?  War machines?  What are you talking about!  Everyone knows mechs are for mining, forestry, etc.  It's only when war breaks out that they're forced to re-purpose the 40 mm machine pistol for destructive purposes.  To think of them as weapons, I am aghast.

[DarkWolf]

Edited side note to IV:
Yeah, the shy-girl-hiding-massive-weapon look was entirely on purpose.  You can make your machines flex their muscles and bare their teeth anytime.  Making it look innocent is hard.

They're giant war machines, they aren't supposed to look innocent, they're supposed to look like they could rip your teeth out through your arse in the blink of an eye. I will admit that very little of my original creations look pretty to most, but they do look deadly, and that's the important part. And, on a competely random note, I'm going to preorder some of those IR control parts and motorize my IKE-3.

Mechs?  War machines?  What are you talking about!  Everyone knows mechs are for mining, forestry, etc.  It's only when war breaks out that they're forced to re-purpose the 40 mm machine pistol for destructive purposes.  To think of them as weapons, I am aghast.

Let me use Armored Core for an example. First, we blow ourselves up, and the survivors move underground. 100 years after we move underground, we develope the Muscle Tracers, AKA, MTs. These started out as simple mining and construction and stuff like that. Then we came up with the Cored Muscle Tracer, CMT, which is basically an MT but designed around a central core, which houses the pilot, and can be equipped with a crapload of different stuff with no problem. Of course, during all of this, Corporations have been using MTs to wage war on each other, and the CMT eventually evolves into the Armored Core, ACs, which are designed for war ONLY! They are used by the elite pilots of all humanity, the Ravens, mercenaries, willing to fight for whoever has the most cash. ACs are never put to use mining, that is the job of MTs, though both can be seen on any battlefield. And even during times of peace, and I mean real peace, not the crap that happens every other year in the Middle East, the Raven's train to stay sharp for the next war.

[Carrnevil9]

Let me use Armored Core for an example. First, we blow ourselves up, and the survivors move underground. 100 years after we move underground, we develope the Muscle Tracers, AKA, MTs. These started out as simple mining and construction and stuff like that. Then we came up with the Cored Muscle Tracer, CMT, which is basically an MT but designed around a central core, which houses the pilot, and can be equipped with a crapload of different stuff with no problem. Of course, during all of this, Corporations have been using MTs to wage war on each other, and the CMT eventually evolves into the Armored Core, ACs, which are designed for war ONLY! They are used by the elite pilots of all humanity, the Ravens, mercenaries, willing to fight for whoever has the most cash. ACs are never put to use mining, that is the job of MTs, though both can be seen on any battlefield. And even during times of peace, and I mean real peace, not the crap that happens every other year in the Middle East, the Raven's train to stay sharp for the next war.

I'm terribly sorry if the sarcasm wasn't dripping enough from my last post.  I can't possibly imagine any other purpose for a giant legged object besides blowing up other giant legged objects.  However, I'm fairly certain that the Mechwarrior/Battletech series has several 'modified' industrial purpose mechs which also came before the war-inclined versions.  /shrug either way.

[DarkWolf]

Let me use Armored Core for an example. First, we blow ourselves up, and the survivors move underground. 100 years after we move underground, we develope the Muscle Tracers, AKA, MTs. These started out as simple mining and construction and stuff like that. Then we came up with the Cored Muscle Tracer, CMT, which is basically an MT but designed around a central core, which houses the pilot, and can be equipped with a crapload of different stuff with no problem. Of course, during all of this, Corporations have been using MTs to wage war on each other, and the CMT eventually evolves into the Armored Core, ACs, which are designed for war ONLY! They are used by the elite pilots of all humanity, the Ravens, mercenaries, willing to fight for whoever has the most cash. ACs are never put to use mining, that is the job of MTs, though both can be seen on any battlefield. And even during times of peace, and I mean real peace, not the crap that happens every other year in the Middle East, the Raven's train to stay sharp for the next war.

I'm terribly sorry if the sarcasm wasn't dripping enough from my last post.  I can't possibly imagine any other purpose for a giant legged object besides blowing up other giant legged objects.  However, I'm fairly certain that the Mechwarrior/Battletech series has several 'modified' industrial purpose mechs which also came before the war-inclined versions.  /shrug either way.

Right, sorry. Sarcasm is rather hard to protray on a text post. Happens all the time, but, either way, mechs will start out as industrial tools, then the US military (who else?) will put tank cannons on the arms, and then we break out the old Atomic Rifle, and then the Russians start making them, and then they sell them to those terrorist whack-jobs, and then world goes BANG! Still, I hope I get to pilot a combat mech in the final days of the world.

[Carrnevil9]

I guess that's as good a tangent as any to lead into my orange 'worker' model:  



Back.  Erm, back while expressing how displeased it is:



Front, 'working':



This is a size 5 vehicle (seeing a trend yet?  No?) with a structure level 5.  Speed is 8".

This oddly has no claws, but rather large hands for general horseplay and pretending to be a martial arts master.  On the back of the hand is a short shovel-blade that is better suited for punching holes in buildings than digging mass graves.  Finally, attached to the back are some empty stereo speakers (this is attributed to several 'blowouts,' after which Iron Sword's leaders decided, upon regaining their hearing, not to repair.)  They currently pose no threat.

I intend to give this machine a bonus if the driver has a mustache, as I would have you believe it is closer to an industrial machine than a combat one.

CC had better be determined before I finish writing up the last four.

[IVhorseman]

great working model, but seeing it lack any kind of actual "weapon" makes me a very sad panda.

what about those converted weapons you mentioned earlier? buzzsaws may be intended to cut down trees, but they work just as well on ankles as they do on stumps! and of course some kind of giant nailgun type thing that shoots out I-beams would be great too (you take one look at a nailgun and tell me it WASN'T designed with an "alternative" use in mind).

[Carrnevil9]

great working model, but seeing it lack any kind of actual "weapon" makes me a very sad panda.

what about those converted weapons you mentioned earlier? buzzsaws may be intended to cut down trees, but they work just as well on ankles as they do on stumps! and of course some kind of giant nailgun type thing that shoots out I-beams would be great too (you take one look at a nailgun and tell me it WASN'T designed with an "alternative" use in mind).

Well, we tried that for a while, me and orange.  But in the end I figured out it wasn't an agricultural machine, as it would rather pull shoulders from sockets than use a dark bloodstained blade.

Rest assured though, all other machines have standard weapons.

[Carrnevil9]

Well, workweek ended Sunday, guess I can get back to documenting some more mecha.  We've seen Green, Yellow, and Orange, so this leads us to the Red Close Quarters Combat mecha:



back:



And posing in a manner that requires additional support:



Vehicle Size 5, Structure level 4, Speed is 12" (It's red, and therefore 3x faster... than 4".)

Red wields 2 3" daggers and contains the stock Iron Sword claws.  This is the first (read: prototype!  Actual prototype for the rest!) and as such I'm a bit attached to it.  CC will be figured out when I stop procrastinating.

[Carrnevil9]

After much delay, I'm posting the Dark Blue Iron Sword mecha: the ZNAFU II.  Yes, it's the only one I've really come up with a name for and I wouldn't be surprised if it was being used already.



Back:



"It's a GUND(static)!"



Vehicle size: 5
Structure level: 3
Speed: 8"

Yes, what seems to be the most heavily armored machine is in fact the weakest, following in the tradition of all great fodder-mecha.  Armaments include a rifle and standard issue claws.

I'm open to suggestions if anyone wants to figure out the CC on these.  To be entirely honest I'm very lazy and unless I find myself in a fit of math, may not get around to this.

[Rayhawk]

I like how he matches the color scheme of Spider-Man in the background.  All awesome mechs.

[IVhorseman]

those little holes in the back are really bothering me. it seems like you could pile more useless crap there to make it look a thousand times better (i learned just recently that the more useless decorative crap that you have no idea what purpose it would serve you put on something, the more awesome it looks).

as for CC, why not just directly translate the minifig CC rules to these mecha? all you'd really need to do is multiply all size rules by 5 (angry 5", 10" shove, etc.).