Here comes a new challenger!
George Takei: "A three-way, and you didn't invite me? Open fire!"
Secret Faction Unlocked: George Takei (Natalya)
Unfortunately, the crew is still having some trouble with the weapons on their captured Klingy warbird. The plasma accelerator misses entirely, and the plasma wave cannon is far too weak to pierce their target's armor. They do at least manage to launch a photon torpedo.
Britannian Space Superiority Group (Kalvinator)
The fighters advance, but are somehow unable to inflict any damage to the Herd ship in their path.
The bombers are more fortunate. The Herd escort frigate takes a point of damage (4 remaining).
The capital ships move up, preparing their turrets for response fire.
T.L.A. Rapid Assault Task Force (Falk)
The Gamma-class moves up and destroys a fighter.
With Space Force One providing targeting support, the Omega-class cruiser fires its Hellrail and missiles at the Spirit of Friendship. The Hellrail misses, but it's unlikely that the slow-moving ship will be able to dodge the heavy missiles.
Britannian Main Battle Group (Zupponn)
All three ships turn around and kill velocity, waiting for the enemy to approach. This might have been more effective if their turrets could fire through the back of the ship. The cruiser is able to launch a heavy torpedo (5 left).
The Armed Courier shoots down a T.L.A. torpedo.
T.L.A. Ranged Support Task Force (Theblackdog)
The fighters do some component damage to the Herd ships, shooting off a light laser turret and a torpedo launcher. They also take 2 HP off the missile frigate (3 remaining).
Although one of the T.L.A.'s remaining torpedoes is destroyed by response fire, the other does two points of damage to one of the Herd's battle frigates (3 remaining) and 1 point of damage to the Spirit of Friendship (11 remaining).
The Beta-class frigate fires a pair of light missiles at the Herd missile frigate (14 remaining).
The Alpha-class cruiser opens up, firing its rail gun and all the rockets . The two missiles are targeted on the Spirit of Friendship.
The rail gun cuts the Spirit of Friendship down to 9 HP while the missiles and torpedoes are on their way.
Suddenly, an enormous cylindrical warship pops into existence near the Britannian fleet, catching them flat-footed (all ships in firing range rolled a 1 for response fire!).
George Takei: "Oh my!"
Bolts of lightning strike the armed courier and Horatio-class, doing 3 points and 1 point of damage respectively. At the same time, a horrifying blast of static hashes communication and scan channels, disrupting nearby ships' targeting systems.
Spock: "This vessel seems intent on killing us all. Fascinating."
Chekov: "Captain, I have discovered a pattern in the transmissions from this wessel!"
George Takei: "On screen."
George Takei: "Ohhhhhoh my!"
Chekov: "GAH! Off screen! Off screen!"
Spock: "It appears these... sea pwnies are using this probe to cleanse all worlds that they have not colonized."
George Takei: "And which worlds would those be?"
Spock: "All of them. Sea pwnies were driven to extinction. But it is logical that if we play this transmission back to the probe, it will stop attacking."
Takei: "Get our communications gear online and transmit!"
Scotty: "Ach, I canna help you there captain. The Simple Harmonic Oscillator is broken. But there does seem to be a communication dish on the surface of that planet..."
Secret Faction Activated: Sea Pwny Cleanser Probe
New Objective: George Takei must stop the cleanser probe, either by destroying it from his ship or by hijacking the comms dish on the surface to transmit the Sea Pwny Song to the probe.
The missiles fired last turn hit the Armed Courier, finishing it off.
With some lucky shooting, the escort frigate destroys both Vulcan bombers. Ah well, more where they came from.
The battle frigate exchanges fire with the Britannian Monitor, but neither side manages to accomplish anything.
The missile frigate fires all the rockets . The two missiles are locked onto the Britannian monitor.
The fighters gang up on the monitor and take out one of its laser turrets.
With its fighter screen out of the way, the Spirit of Friendship moves into range...
Sparkly Twilight: "Fire the Elements of Harm! We're gonna show you what friendship could be!"
The Horatio-class cruiser takes 2 points of damage (5 HP left) and will be under the Herd's control for the next turn only.
The Spirit's laser turrets fire on the Omega-class cruiser (since it's the only target in range) and do a point of damage (6 remaining).
It also launches 3 new fighters, and takes out a Britannian fighter.
The chaotic traffic on the other side forces the escort and assault frigates to drift through rather than maneuver.
But the missile frigate puts its broadside launchers to good use, maneuvering to fire two more missiles at the monitor.
Tips for next turn:
I'm generally pretty conservative with special abilities, ramming weapons or weapons with ammo constraints, especially torpedoes. It's best to specifically note if you want to use them.
Play aggressively. Sitting and waiting for the enemy to come to you is generally not a good idea.
If one of your ships has missiles locked on it, you might want to consider dodging. If you can get out of your attacker's cone of fire before the missiles arrive, they will automatically miss.
Send in orders for next turn. Remember to send in orders for your ground forces if you can get them to the planet's surface. The ground Overwatch from last turn hasn't changed: