Moderators: warman45, Rev. Sylvanus
rulebook 2001 wrote: ---
DON'T BE AN ANORAK!
A Cautionary Overwatch
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The unrepentant Anorak will experience only frustration and disappointment in a BrikWars game, and will tend to make such an ass of himself that he ruins the fun his opponents might otherwise have had. In order that players might gird themselves against this tragedy, we have created this list contrasting the behavior of the insipid Anorak with that of the heroic BrikWarrior:
THE PLODDING ANORAK carefully reviews his options each turn and takes
the most conservative actions; he knows they will best advance his
position and offer him the greatest chance of eventual victory.
THE DASHING BRIKWARRIOR's actions are daring and even suicidal; he
knows they are likely to have the most comedic and entertaining
results for the highlights reel. Victory is an important concern,
but victory without glory is no victory at all.
If he discovers that his opponent has no units to field except a
couple dozen swordsmen, THE UNSPORTSMANLY ANORAK builds assault
helicopters, knowing foot soldiers have no way to attack air units.
THE CHIVALROUS BRIKWARRIOR always finds a way to give his opponent a
fighting chance - either he also restricts himself to ground units
like jeeps and dune buggies, or he generously allows his opponent to
capture and commandeer some of his advanced war machines prior to
the start of the game.
THE GUTLESS ANORAK abuses his detailed familiarity with the BrikWars
rules, deliberately trying to find or create loopholes that will
allow him to create invincible units. If his supposedly invincible
unit gets destroyed, he throws a tantrum like you wouldn't believe.
If THE ENLIGHTENED BRIKWARRIOR were given an invincible unit, he would
immediately invent clever and creative weaknesses for it, because he
knows that a unit's entertainment value is primarily based on its
ability to get blown into a million tiny plastic bits.
THE OBSESSIVE ANORAK wastes everyone's time by double-checking
statistics and rules on every turn, making sure everything is done
By The Book. He debates every last point, inch, and degree, trying
to advance his position by the evil and insidious technique known as
Rules Lawyering.
THE LIBERATED BRIKWARRIOR contents himself with a lot of hand-waving,
estimation, and group consensus. If he finds out after the game
that everyone did everything completely wrong, it is a source of
amusement to him and nothing more. Exposure to Rules Lawyering
causes him to writhe in pain.
If THE INFANTILE ANORAK finds out his army is a few points smaller
than his opponent's, he whines and cries and throws a fit, demanding
reparations and using phrases like 'no fair' and 'cheater.'
THE PRINCIPLED BRIKWARRIOR pays so little attention to points that he
never notices the disparity, and takes no interest in it when it is
brought to his attention. 'No fair' and 'cheater' are not in his
vocabulary.
THE UNIMAGINITIVE ANORAK wants everything spelled out to the last
detail and refuses to build vehicles or bases until their specific
statistics and building instructions are provided to him!
THE SMARTER-THAN-A-PILE-OF-DUNG BRIKWARRIOR finds it impossible to
believe that anyone would behave in this bizarre manner, even when
witnessing it first-hand. The opportunity to build vehicles and
bases of his own invention is what attracted him to BrikWars in the
first place.
THE HYPOCRITICAL ANORAK refuses to allow himself to be whacked upside
the head with the Hammer of Discipline (described below) for being
an Anorak.
THE SAGACIOUS BRIKWARRIOR has respect for divine justice and will
always allow the Anorak to get whacked on the head for being an
Anorak.
THE SOULLESS ANORAK has no sense of humor and cannot cope with the
fact that we just proponed whacking people with mallets.
THE FUN-LOVING BRIKWARRIOR takes it all in stride. Besides having a
healthy sense of humor, he secretly agrees that the disease of
Anorakism is best treated with a repeated application of blunt force
to the cranium.
THE INCONSIDERATE ANORAK takes no interest in the comfort of his
fellow players and will disregard the importance of taking showers
or brushing his teeth for days or weeks at a time.
THE COURTEOUS BRIKWARRIOR remembers to attend to any outstanding
hygiene issues before associating with others. The best
BrikWarriors go the extra mile by bringing doughnuts for everyone.
If he brings doughnuts AND beer, he can be as much of an Anorak as
he wants.
When happening across an infestation of Jaw-Jaws or Dimmies, THE
GODLESS ANORAK never allows them to distract him from his primary
objectives. He may even have sunk so low as to have a secret
affinity for these creatures of pure evil.
THE RIGHTEOUS BRIKWARRIOR cannot tolerate such an affront to good
taste and will drop everything to eradicate the Jaw-Jaw and Dimmy
species.
rulebook 2001 wrote: ---
THE PLODDING ANORAK carefully reviews his options each turn and takes
the most conservative actions; he knows they will best advance his
position and offer him the greatest chance of eventual victory.
THE DASHING BRIKWARRIOR's actions are daring and even suicidal; he
knows they are likely to have the most comedic and entertaining
results for the highlights reel. Victory is an important concern,
but victory without glory is no victory at all.
muffinman42 wrote: the uber troop just has to find a corridor and sit at the end of it blasting each crap troop in turn (or ten at a time if he/she has a explosive or flamthrower).
birdman wrote:EDITORIALIZATION:
IV, I was not asking for that rank.
Warhead wrote:my head burns with War.
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