Tidings of Yule - Finale

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Tidings of Yule - Finale

Postby Kommander Ken » Tue Dec 27, 2016 12:13 am

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It wasn't the first time Ken had been involuntarily ripped from one reality to another, and he would later realize that it probably wouldn't be the last. One moment the young QuantumSurfer was at the Frostbornian city, Pinewood, preparing defenses against an ominous invasion and the next everything around him spun around and turned into swirling darkness.






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The vortex he was trapped in temporarily rendered him incapable of speech, denying him to vocally question the situation he had just been placed into or even who -or what- had summoned him here... where ever here was.






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Finally his body found a flat surface which he could only assume to be the 'ground' and the vortex disappeared from view, leaving him dazed and confused. "W-whaa..." At least his voice had come back to him.






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"This... again?" Ken muttered to himself as he stared around him. A familiar ominous feeling began to creep up on him, and in the darkness that surrounded him he waited for someone to step forward and explain why once again he'd been called to the nether-realms without so much as a written invitation.






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But no one came.


Just that same ill-boding feeling, growing l͉͇͇͔̭͚a̪̰͓̙͉̪̞r͔͓̹̪g̷̱̣͖̹̘͙e͔͉̬̘̕r̞̤̥ á҉̶̳̘͔͕̰̳̗͘͜ń̷̷҉̴͓̤͙̭̪̰̣͙̫̠̤̺̱͕̹ͅd̷̛̮̳̬̜̺̰̜̗͎̻͔̮̲͉́-̰̖̮̮̦̳̳̣̺̘͉͇̼̠
̶̵̤̰̬̼̣͍̺






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"Whoa! A... dire wolf? What're you doing h-"






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"-Well it's about damn time one of you lot showed up!"






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A large, burly minifig with a musky scent of pine needles effortlessly lifted Ken to his feet. At first the QuantumSurfer tried to wriggle out of the man's iron grip but something about the stranger told him he meant Ken no harm.






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"Hmm," The stag-helmed minifig scrutinized Ken with an utmost profound expression, "aha! You'll do! You don't look nearly as flashy or dramatic as the other ones, so all for the better I say!" He boomed with a jolly grin.

"S-sorry," Ken stammered, legs dangling an inch or two off the ground, "but... who the BrikHell are you?"






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The stag-helmed, Norse-looking fellow set Ken down and rested his flagon of mead at his side. "You mean you can't tell?" He asked Ken, who slowly shook his head with a concerned expression.






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"I... AM..."







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"FATHER YUUUULLLEEEE!!!"

Ken winced as Father Yule's roaring voice filled the empty realm with festive ferocity. "Oh. Cool."






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"And that," Father Yule used his peppermint axe to point behind them, "is my sleigh of Yuletide cheer!"






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The gleaming red sleigh was loaded with weapons, barrels full of weapons, and bags probably full of concealed weapons. Other items seemed to be among them but the emphasis seemed to be mostly on the weapons.






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"Nice sleigh," Ken observed while bending to pick up his trusty ebony sword, "but why am I here?"






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"Because I," Father Yule lumbered over to his sleigh and grabbed Ken's cloak as he did so, "need a co-pilot!"

"W-what?! But I haven't the slightest idea how to fly that th-"

"Who said anything about flying?" Mused Father Yule, "you let me worry about the reins, lad. What you'll be doing will require more... swordplay."




~ End Act I ~
Last edited by Kommander Ken on Sun Jan 01, 2017 10:04 pm, edited 3 times in total.
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Re: Tidings of Yule - Act I

Postby TastySkippy123 » Tue Dec 27, 2016 12:31 am

:omnom:
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Re: Tidings of Yule - Act I

Postby RedRover » Tue Dec 27, 2016 2:26 am

This is magnificent in concept, writing, and photography. Well done!
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Re: Tidings of Yule - Act I

Postby Quantumsurfer » Tue Dec 27, 2016 7:01 am

Oh, my fucking god, I love it.
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Re: Tidings of Yule - Act I

Postby Mraydus Awakened » Wed Dec 28, 2016 11:48 pm

MORE MORE MORE!!! MWHAHAHAH!! You should make lego webcomics....  :D
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Re: Tidings of Yule - Act I

Postby TheVengefulOne » Thu Dec 29, 2016 10:56 am

I love the design of the the Slay Sleigh.
Blunt the swords and bend the figs!
Shred the paper and burn the briks!
Chip the molds and crack the plates!
That's what Bilbo Baggins hates!
- Tzan

My faction's backstory: http://brikwars.com/forums/viewtopic.php?f=39&t=16445

My Flickr: https://www.flickr.com/photos/150398410@N07/
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Postby Kommander Ken » Thu Dec 29, 2016 9:17 pm

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Father Yule's Slayh races through time and space, sailing through the fabric-y folds of the Brikverse.






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Ken clung to the back, practically hanging on for dear life to keep himself from becoming lost to the uncertain void that surrounded them.






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"Where are we even going?!" The cloaked quantumsurfer managed to shout. "And wait a second... are you drinking and driving..?"






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"We're takin' a couple shortcuts!" Father Yule roared back, having a much easier time throwing his deep, enriching voice around. "Drivin'? Haha! I'm only doin' the steerin', lad!"






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"Ho there, jolly dire wolf! Wait, what der' fuck is that thing?"






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The dire wolf stopped in it's tracks and growled at a strange substance blocking the way.






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OT oozed out from under their cosmic path, there seemed to be something rising from the glowing pool.






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A grotesque shape raised in front of them, it appeared to be clenching for some reason.






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It released it's seven appendages like a spring-trap, radiating strange energy that started to fizzle around it.






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It was a portal!






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"RARRGGHH!" Father Yule was quick to action, springing from his Yule-Throne to defend his steed.







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"To arms, Ken! They're bloody HOLI-DAEMONS!"






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"Bloody whut?..."






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"Oh. You guys don't look friendly. So, guys..."






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"How do you get your kicks?"






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"Huh. I guess I see your point, Holi-demon? Dae...mon? Am I saying that right?"

"Rrrrr. Actually its-"






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"HOLI-DAEMON!"

"Didn't I already say that?"







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"Maybe you'd like some nice Holiday punch?"

"Jusss staahhp"







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"Dully noted." Ken extinguished the HOLIDAEMON's life like he would a candle.






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"Shit, better go help boss Yule!"






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"-Oh."





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"And a Happy Yuletide to YOOUU!" Father Yuletide bellowed, lopping off the head of the last HOLIDEYMON (Ken doesn't know what to call them anymore).






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Ken cautiously steps toward Father Yule, who stares at the portal in silence as the corpses and gore around them vanish.

"I need you to destroy that thing, lad," Father Y. says in a surprisingly calm voice.

"What... is that thing? It looks like a-"

"-Arsehole."

"Well, that's a little rude but-"

"No butts. Just an arsehole."

Realization hit Ken like a speeding Slaygh. "Ewww..."






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"Summoned by that vile Brikthulu himself! Every year he tries to literally shit on other holidays that don't celebrate him."

"That stinks," observed Ken.

"RIGHT?! But anyway. You must smite it, Ken. Only your Quantum-whatsit powers can counteract Brikthulu's shittery. Well, I could also do it myself. But you doing it instead would reeeaally piss him off, so better for us I'd say!"






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"Sure... not everyday I have to stab a... yeah." Ken stepped toward the portal with an uncertain gait.






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"Destroy it quick, and hop back on! There's no tellin' what else awaits us out there."






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"Alright," Ken lifted his ebony blade up toward what he assumed would be the heavens, taking a deep breath. "I still have no idea what powers I even possess, but-"






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"Here. Goes. Something!"






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A flash like lightning struck Ken, sizzling the molecules around him as waves of BT coursed through him.






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"Cool!" Was all Ken could muster vocally.






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He steadied himself as the energies around him gathered into his sword.






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Ken set his gaze on the vexing portal and took a mighty leap toward it.






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His energized blade sinks into the depths of the portal, sending shockwaves that even buffeted Father Yule atop his Slayh.






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"GAAAKKFFHHH!-"

The portal did not take kindly to the disturbance.






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QS Ken's body lay limp several inches away, his energized form still permeating his vassal.






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The warp's glow grew, indicating that something was quickly approaching from the other side.






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A daemonic figure stepped out, chains rattling.






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"Odin's beard. This year just got a whole lot more interesting," mused Father Yule, "if it isn't the infamous Krappiss?"






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Krappiss leered at them, his cracked lips pulling at a yellow-toothed grin. "Father Yuleee..."






Image






~End Act II~
Last edited by Kommander Ken on Fri Dec 30, 2016 12:22 am, edited 3 times in total.
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Re: Tidings of Yule - Act II

Postby Quantumsurfer » Thu Dec 29, 2016 9:43 pm

Hilarious.  Very punny.
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Re: Tidings of Yule - Act II

Postby lordintype » Fri Dec 30, 2016 2:19 am

Someone tell Father Yule not to drink and drive. He'll spill his beer.

Oh, and very nicely done Ken. Can't wait to see the next instalment.
I like cows

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Re: Tidings of Yule - Act II

Postby Duerer » Fri Dec 30, 2016 2:42 am

Nice FX
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Re: Tidings of Yule - Act II

Postby Tzan » Fri Dec 30, 2016 11:16 am

Really great!
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Re: Tidings of Yule - Act II

Postby TastySkippy123 » Sat Dec 31, 2016 6:07 pm

can't wait till act III, this is so funny and entertaining.
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Re: Tidings of Yule - Act II

Postby Kommander Ken » Sun Jan 01, 2017 12:25 pm

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“I can’t let you go any further, Norsemen.” Hissed Krappiss, blocking the way of Father Yule’s Slaygh.






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Father Yule leapt atop his dire wolf companion to get a better look at the daemonic punisher of peace-loving minifigs. “You’re trying to stop the wrong holiday, daemon,” he growled, “Saturnalia was weeks ago.”






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“I’m under a new jurisdiction,” Krappiss explained slyly, “starting next year, holidays are going to be… better.”

“Better? Ha!” Spat Father Yule, “our holidays are as glorious as ever! Now step aside or I’ll run you and your ass-portal down!”






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“Such arrogance,” Krappiss chided. He reeled his bells and chains back like a whip and they extended over twice their original size. “You’ll be just as easy to dispatch as the rest of them.”






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The chains and bells wrapped around Father Yule and threatened to squeeze the life out of his jolly form. “Gachh… what are you… talkin’ about?” The Yule Father managed to say.







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“What… others?”







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Ken meanwhile appeared unconscious, his body and mind slowly s͖͓͉̯̫̹l̩̲͡i̦̫̘̳̣͓p̧̥p̦̼̱̠̙͕̲i̤͕̼̝n̙͍̰ͅg͎̱͙ a̴̪̠̲̼̼ͫ͊ͥͧͭ̈́̈̑̈̊͌́̆̄͛̈ͤ̀̀̕w̴̤͙͔̠̦͈ͪ̒̈ͭ̍̓̃̔͛ͥ͂̽͐̚a͆͋̔̅͏̴̧̼͈͍͙̬̰̤̝ͅ-̵͔͔͓̮̱͚̻̹͔̖̤͙͚̆ͯ̓̿̚͢ͅ






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"-̦̗̟̞̗̲N͚̯͓o̞̻̪̤!̺̼͉ Not like this!"






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Gathering his strength, Ken jumped to his feet and raced forward, sparks of raw energy licking the area behind him.






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Pure BT erupted from his hand to form a makeshift sword.






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"Not like this, you bearded shitgoat!”






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SLAASHH!






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With all his might, Ken struck a powerful blow with a sharp blade of pure BT, but Krappiss warded it off with what looked like to be an ordinary branch.






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“A... Quantumsurfer? How very... interesting."






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“Thanks kid!” Roared Father Yule, free from Krappiss’s terrible grip.






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Krappiss looked skyward and his face twisted into an ugly rage, “you’re all-“






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“RARRRGGHHHH!” Father Yule’s howl drowned out the rest of the daemon’s words as a mighty blow from his peppermint axe knocked him off his feet.






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And send him hurtling back into whatever ass-backwards dimension he had come from, destroying the portal along with it.






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“Thanks Ken,” said Father Yule, “I don’t know what Dingleberries over there was talkin’ about, but I’ve got a bad feelin’… C’mon, let’s get this Yuletide over with. I’ll look more into this afterwards...”

“Gotcha.”




~End Act III~
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Re: Tidings of Yule - Act III

Postby TastySkippy123 » Sun Jan 01, 2017 5:36 pm

:omnom:
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Re: Tidings of Yule - Act III

Postby Kommander Ken » Sun Jan 01, 2017 10:04 pm

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Ken and Father Yule’s journey continued, speeding through the cosmos as the blackness of time and space flew soundlessly past them.






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“Not much farther now,” Father Yule informed Ken, “just a few more turns.”






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Out of the depths of the ether around them, a great beast appeared and opened its maw with a mighty roar, breaking the silence.

“Holy shit, is that a dragon?!” Ken shouted.






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The dragon swooped over the Slaygh and peered down at it’s inhabitants. Otherwise, it did nothing to deter them.






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“Relax, kid,” laughed Father Yule, “actually that there was a wyvern. Aren’t you from Medivo? Shouldn’t that be an everyday sight for you?”

“Not sure there are many those in the Upper Norselands,” answered Ken.
    
“Really? Ah, fair enough.”






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“Hey, what’s that place? It seems… familiar.”

“Ah, yes. That place is quite legendary amongst your type.”






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“I can see you finding your way there someday soon.”

“Strange,” Ken observed.






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They carried on, Father Yule’s slaygh heading toward a rift as Ken stared behind them in silent wonder.
“Hey wait a second,” he muttered, “isn’t that place the F-“






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Before he could finish a sentence or even a train of thought, blinding light consumed Ken’s vision. They were back on Medivo, only in a place he’d never seen before.

“Aha, finally! Just in time for the final feasts!” Father Yule exclaimed.






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The duo left exited the Slaygh and Father Yule grinned heartily. “Well lad,” he said, “thank’ee for the help!”

“No problem!”






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Father Yule shook Ken’s hand with his fierce iron grip, “I prob’ly wouldn’t have made it out of there were it not for ya! Such a fickle string of events this year, indeed.”

“Fickle events are my specialty.”






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“Good! I’ll definitely put a good word in for ya then, eh?”






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Ken was about to ask something like “a good word to whom?” but a kiss from an attractive barmaid was about to be had.






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But once again Ken found himself plucked from reality in a spontaneous feat of other-worldly teleportation. “Gaaahh, can’t you just let me walk home?!”

“We’ll meet again, Ken!” Cackled Father Yule.





~End~
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