Things look grim for Santa. Will Saturnalia be doomed?...
NO! Summoning his final strength, Santa transforms into Mega-Claus!
("Mega" as in "big", not "made of Megabloks")
He rips the turret off the Deathmobile and uses it to bludgeon the driver to death.
He fires it one-handed at the Aliens, but misses.
Xenu retaliates, and kills Mega-Claus. So yes, Saturnalia will, in fact, be doomed. It's been postponed by 362 days.
The flamethrower trooper moves up but can't quite reach him.
The Bounty Hunter with the bazooka discards it and mans the turret to bring down the Road Warriors' stolen VTOL.
The Deadly Spaceman, though...
...he has better luck.
The shotgun rocket trooper kills the Road Warrior with the flamethrower.
The Knights charge the Killdozer, but even the most charitable application of horse movement ranges and Angry Inch rules leaves them just out of range. Sorry.
The robots opt to go out with a whimper instead of a bang and race for their starting point in a vain attempt to complete their objective.
The bazooka clone calls an R-2 unit to heal the tank driver.
Commander Phat kills the Infiltrator bot and stands triumphantly amid the wreckage.
The two clones in the APC hit full reverse and head towards the Black Hat fort's wall, firing as they go. And missing.
Irony Man calls down a bazooka trooper, who opens fire on the dimmies.
The round falls short. At least they can use it to play Exploding Hot Potato.
The fighter flies over the fort, and Irony Man leaps off, main gun snapping into place as he scans the area around the sleigh engine for threats.
He finds one. Goodbye, Road Warrior Hero.
The Dimmies gather around the Saturnalia tree to sing carols, while the droid repairs the bohrok. (Usually droids repair things after the end of the turn, but for reasons you will see below, I didn't feel too compelled to follow the rules while executing Warhead's orders)
"loo loo loo loo loo loo loooo..."
Then they open presents. "Whoa, a rocket-propelled chainsaw launcher!"
Of course, arguments ensue. "Hey, lemme try it!"
The repaired bohrok has its own opinion on the matter, it appears.
The killdozer pulls up next to the fortress wall.
A worker shoves the fuel tank over the parapet.
Another begins to slice it open with the thermal lance...
... and it explodes, clearing away the fort and all its surroundings to make way for Radioactive Acres condominiums.
Thanks to all who participated. I really feel I could have done better with this; the basic idea was okay but there were a lot of issues with starting placement that kept some groups from getting to the center of the action quickly and left others surrounded by powerful enemies. I learned a lot from this battle, but it'll be good to disassemble some stuff so I have an actual collection to build with again. Good game to all, and to all a good night.