Piltogg

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Piltogg
Emperor piltogg.jpg

Paladin of Purity

Emperor of Akkadia

Player
Piltogg
Faction
Akkadian Empire

Piltogg is the name of the minifig Emperor of Akkadia, the Human leader of the Minnesota Gamers Guild (MNGG), The Uber-Kaiser of the Third Alliance and for the metric unit of manliness. These are all basically the same thing.

Contents

The Paladin of Purity

Piltogg, Paladin of Purity

Self-portrait of Piltogg, self-appointed Paladin of Purity. Piltogg's inability to get into art school is often cited as a primary source of his frustration.

Piltogg gets bored a lot and then does stupid things without thinking about the consequences. Most observers agree that this is awesome, with some exceptions - notably Blitzen, thanks to his predilection horrendous spelling and grammar. He has a strong distaste for anything not yellow and pure, and leads genocidal campaigns against the NegaVerse and Peach forces.

Piltogg claims that he is the Paladin of Purity, and was once the third-highest-ranking prophet of the Great Builder. (His job was to rid the universe of all things that the Great Builder had created but no longer wanted around; via destruction.) However, he turned against his former master after the Bayounikal Revolution, as it showed him that half of all the Great Builder's MOCs were built with POOP, just like in the NegaVerse. He took it upon himself to destroy the not only all fo the great builder's creations, but even the great builder himself. After completing the destruction of the Great Creator's silly idea of a BrikVerse, Piltogg plans to reshape it in his own refined image so that his eternal labor would end and minifigs would be at peace with all their fellow minifigs just like the Great Creator had originally intended.

The Artifax of Pre-Creation

After his initial rebellion against the Great Builder, Piltogg banded together with the ultimate form of minifig awesomeness: the ninja! After a few brief skirmishes with the NegaBlok army, Piltogg and his Space Ninja allies had gathered enough gold and gems to fund his crusade against nega-blokian forces for the next three years.

He was eventually able to confront the Nega-BlokTrix herself, and their battle lasted four months. On the 121st day of the battle, the Nega-BlokTrix surrendered her mightiest weapon so that her race might be saved from extinction. That is how Piltogg gained the Sword of Inhuman Strength, the first of The Nine Artifax of Pre-Creation. With it, he gets a +1 bonus to all rolls he makes for every living thing that he has slain, although even its power doesn't protect him from the occasional Critical Failure. Now, after years of slaughter, all his rolls are so great that even when he is hit by a car (a very common death among minifigs), he escapes unscathed and the car is obliterated.

With the power of the Sword, Piltogg was soon recruited as a fast-rising Hero of the Akkadian Empire, and was eventually crowned "Emperor". Of course, power corrupts, and Piltogg's desire to undo the Great Builder's work had never lessened. He became obsessed with gathering all nine of the Artifax, and in R. 2,010 he embarked on a massive quest to collect them all, becoming the very best like no one ever was. This became known as the Quest of Piltogg, and is currently ongoing.

As the figurehead "Emperor" of the Akkadian empire; Piltogg has been involved in much political intrigue; and has gained many other allies and titles; these are really more on the side and not essential to the character; so they are listed here;

Allies and Enemies

An Akkadian Kommand Squad, led by Piltogg

An Akkadian Kommand Squad, lead by Piltogg

Piltogg's earliest allies were the Space Ninjas and Space Nazis, who aided him in his early crusades against the Nega-BlokTrix.

Following his rise to power in Akkadia, he also began accepting bribes the DarkTron anonymocracy, who wanted to use his powers for evil (obviously). Piltogg had no problems with this alliance because the DarkTrons also wished to promote universal domination.

Piltogg has gathered several significant allies on his Quest, including the Akkadian hero Vas Kallas. Moronstudios, Lord Von Krus, and Ross Varn also joined his party following a cowardly ambush by two Noobs, Brik-Hed and the Man in the Top Hat, but he also gained an additional enemy in the deadly sniper Cpl. Halan.

During the battle for the Hammer of Discipline, Piltogg used an inspirational speech to gain the personal allegiance of all soldiers in the VladTron Empire, although not that of Lord VladTron himself, who was reported to be less than pleased about this development.

It is theorized that Piltogg also has connections in some way to the Brickmasons and to the Cult of BrikThulu. Brikverse Canon can not be used to either confirm or deny these theories as of yet.

Over the long course of the Quest of Piltogg, several other key events were taking place in the Brikverse; For example, during the Immortal War, Piltogg and his Akkadian allies joined forces with the Immortals to take down the palace of FICO, as well as conquer some of the surrounding territories along with several other pro-immortal militaries.

Additionally, with the rise of the third alliance, and the subsequent rise of Ekvestria; Piltogg was elected as the Uber-Kaiser of the Third Alliance, and was known to have made some ties with Killestia, leader of the pwnie genus; as it was thought that pwnie magic could be twisted into new and powerful technologies by the Akkadian Science labs aboard the Juggernaught.

All in all, it is clear that Piltogg has accumulated a metric fuckton of allies over the course of recent history. How and why this has occurred is shrouded in much mystery.

Appearances

Battle Date Storyline Played By Result Thread
2010 2010 ώ ώ ώ ώ
Hope's Last Stand 2010 07/16 Silverdream Victory Forum Thread
Quest of Piltogg 2010 10/21 Quest of Piltogg Piltogg Victory Forum Thread
2011 2011 ώ ώ ώ ώ
Krysto 2011 01/09 Quest of Piltogg Silverdream Victory Forum Thread
Battle for the Head Separator 2011 05/20 Quest of Piltogg Piltogg Victory Forum Thread
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