Pwnie

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''"There is a cancer eating at the BrikVerse. With each Rekonstruktion it advances deeper, generously leaving drained, dead worlds in its wake. This horror, this abomination, has honesty and loyalty that functions on an unimaginable, galaktic scale and all we can do is try to stop the swarms of laughing monsters it unleashes upon us as an act of kindness. We have given the horror a name to salve our fears; we call it the Pwnie race, but if is aware of us at all it must know us only as Friends."''
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''"There is a cancer eating at the BrikVerse. With each Rekonstruktion it advances deeper, generously leaving drained, dead worlds in its wake. This horror, this abomination, has honesty and loyalty that functions on an unimaginable, galaktic scale and all we can do is try to stop the swarms of laughing monsters it unleashes upon us as an act of kindness. We have given the horror a name to salve our fears; we call it the Pwnie race, but if it is aware of us at all it must know us only as Friends."''
  
 
''- [[Inquistadorial Monarchy|Inquistador]] Cschzevak''
 
''- [[Inquistadorial Monarchy|Inquistador]] Cschzevak''

Latest revision as of 09:40, 7 February 2013

"There is a cancer eating at the BrikVerse. With each Rekonstruktion it advances deeper, generously leaving drained, dead worlds in its wake. This horror, this abomination, has honesty and loyalty that functions on an unimaginable, galaktic scale and all we can do is try to stop the swarms of laughing monsters it unleashes upon us as an act of kindness. We have given the horror a name to salve our fears; we call it the Pwnie race, but if it is aware of us at all it must know us only as Friends."

- Inquistador Cschzevak

The Pwnies are a strange and often reviled race. They appeared in force in the BrikVerse in R. 2,012, but were first sighted as far back as R. 2,010. Many other factions hold strong opinions on the Pwnies, either positive or negative, and do not hesitate to prove their point by force. Thus the Pwnies have caused plenty of violence, indirectly as well as directly, and that's always good.

The first recorded sighting of a Pwnie, at a pirate party on Charybdia.

Contents

[edit] Appearance

Pwnies come in many forms, but all are of the ekvine genus. Some are almost indistinguishable from common horses, some are brik-built creatures. Others are weirder still, not made of Leg-Ore at all, but some unknown otherworldly material. All Pwnies share the same basic biological traits, however: Four legs, mane and tail, and insatiable bloodthirst.

Pwnies fighting Silvarians.

[edit] Castes

There are four distinct castes of Pwnies, found in all of the race's forms. They are as follows.

[edit] Horny Pwnies

Horny Pwnies have a (constantly hard) horn in their forehead. They use this to make magik happen.

[edit] Kamikaze Pwnies

Kamikaze Pwnies are winged Pwnies whose job is to crash into the enemy from above, exploding and taking as many foes with them as possible.

[edit] Redneck Pwnies

Redneck Pwnies make booze and get drunk a lot. Their families are big and highly intraconnected.

[edit] All-In-One Pwnies

This is the rarest and most powerful Pwnie caste. They combine the best traits from every other caste: the horn and magik of the Horny Pwnies, the wings of the Kamikaze Pwnies, and... yeah. The supreme ruler of the Pwnies, Princess Killestia, belongs to this caste, and so does her right hand sister, Princess Loony.

Pwnies invading the Brittanian planet Wraysford.

[edit] Homeworld

The magikal world of Ekvestria is the home of the Pwnies. It is a beautiful planet covered in green fields, verdant forests, glittering lakes, and giant impact craters. The magikal power of Princess Killestia is so great that she can move entire stellar bodies with a thought. Therefore the Pwnies do not need spaceships; the Princess just moves the entire Ekvestrian solar system to wherever they want to wage war, smashing Ekvestria right into the enemy planet.


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