Hungry for Chaos: Turn 0 [HH]
Posted: Tue Oct 30, 2018 5:10 pm
The Azurian Star Empire has collapsed, its scattered regiments and duchies - already unstable at best - dismantled by hordes of Brootalz and the rising threat of Ragnablok. In its wake, many outlying colonies, such as the carrot-farming asteroid of Belganus, have reverted to a primitive state of feudal law. Supply shipments and trade have ceased between its worlds, and for Belganus' peasants, anything to eat besides carrot is a luxury.
It's a quiet day on Belganus when a peasant washing their only material possession stops, their curiosity piqued by an impossible scent in the air. "Is that..."
The village's emotionally unstable grocer, excited as he is to chop up something not a carrot, pauses mid-swing. "Could that be?"
"After all these long months..." The shopkeep of the Golden Goose, the town's weapon and household goods outfitter, takes a deep, murmuring breath. "I remember that smell."
It's a Chicken Wing, basking over a hot grill inside Belganus Castle. Such a treasure has not been tasted in the eight months since the last supply shipment from Azure. The resident nobles have decided to set up a feast just for themselves, complete with a dainty desert table. Even if the peasantry were to catch a whiff of the delicious meal, these three are alumni of Gordell's Academy for Supernatural Science, and are perfectly confident they could reduce any would-be thieves to ashes.
Faction One: Lords of Belganus
Hero: Lord Burgund, with the blue cap and tan wand. His wand is enchanted with a SuperNatural D6, and his fellow lords' staff and wand are enchanted with SuperNatural D4s.
"The lords are cooking a feast for themselves while we starve on carrots!" An annoying orphan boy sings loudly over the megaphone, clambering to the top of a pile of hay. "We won't stand for this! I call revolution, boys!" Bothering the village elders and stealing from the Golden Goose is no longer enough for this young impoverished lad; he wants a full-blown topple of the aristocracy.
Faction Two: Revolting Orphans
Hero: Jacque the Kid. His club is a hand weapon, and the other boys are holding brooms that are Random Objects. That's okay; they probably would hurt themselves with sharp objects anyway. Jacque's megaphone is purely for spewing propaganda in song form.
Three knights of the Azurian Star Brigade, returning from a skirmish with a handful of rats, pause near the castle. "I say," Sir Bentley Weldwell gestures with his sword, "I think I smell something delicious. Excellent; I'm famished from our travels - let's get some of whatever they're cooking in there!"
Faction Three: Star Knights
Hero: Sir Bentley Weldwell, the Slayer of Rats and Other Minor Vermin. His OTspear does an additional 1d4 Damage, but is only counted as a Heavy Weapon if he's wielding it with one hand.
Unbeknownst to the Lords of Belganus, the smell of gently crisping chicken, dusted and spicy, has drifted far on the winds. Long before the Azurian Star Empire set foot on Belganus, native minifigs were peacefully bashing each other's heads in with rocks and clubs. Attracted by the wafting odors, Chief Grunbog has arrived to settle his score with the Lords and feast on their poultry.
Faction Four: Barbarians
Hero: Chief Grunbog. He's got a swinging mace that counts as a Two-Handed weapon. His clanmates have clubs that count as Heavy Weapons.
As the various forces already at play on Belganus collide near the town square, it attracts the attention of the eldritch and terrible Adorribles: cute pink agents of chaos and madness. Pushing through into the fabric of Brikverse reality like a gashapon toy popping out of a vending machine, their pagoda descends on Belganus. As it comes to hover a meter above the soil, two eldritch forms erupt from the ground - a Cute Birb and a Leggy Boi. With stars in her eyes, Princess Petalbloom points her wand at the prize. This is no ordinary chicken wing; it's been seasoned with Chaos Spice, and the Adorribles must have its power.
Faction Five: Adorribles
Hero: Princess Petalbloom. Her wand is enchanted with a Supernatural D12. Her acolytes may have Random Objects, but her Cuterrations each can do a Hand Weapon of Psychic Damage in close combat.
The seasoning of the chicken wing with Chaos Spice did not go unnoticed. From the darkness of space another dimension-travelling terror arrives in the form of Malvoggar, Lord of Suffering. With him he brings his cybernetically 'enhanced' robo-demons, minifigs who he's tortured into entirely new creatures. This Chaos Spice will fuel his Doom Engine with ease!
Faction Six: Robo-Demons
Hero: Malvoggar, Lord of Suffering. He's a flying robo-demon with a massive Spear of Suffering. It deals +1d4 Disease Damage, but only counts as a Heavy Weapon while he's wielding it one-handed.
In the shadows, another figure lurks. All known Chaos Spice was thought to be locked in the Cosmic Kitchen Cabinet, but apparently one can escaped the grasp of the Crimson Eye. It's the duty of the secret organization to retrieve the sample, and they've sent one of their best field operatives to make that happen. He ducks back into the shadows and vanishes - but he's not going anywhere.
Secret Faction: The Crimson Eye
Consists of one Thief, starting immediately Stealthed at the location shown, and one Infiltrator. This Infiltrator is secretly impersonating one of the minifigs on the board, and can declare who he is at any time. However, a Hero or the last standing unit of a team cannot be Impersonated. It's not secret if you announce the faction at the beginning of the faction, you say? This is Brikwars, you Dimmie. The Crimson Eye are ALWAYS secret.
Overwatch of the Map!
The Lords of Belganus, seeing the chaos amassing outside (possibly as a result of their eldritch cooking) have summoned a convoy of knights to protect them. This will arrive at the end of ten turns and spell the end of the game. A few things to keep in mind:
The Chicken Wing of Spicy Chaos is a Heroic Artifakt.
The village NPCs will act out in response to you.
Leaving the map will be treated as surrender.
Be the last one holding the Chicken Wing. Extra points for things that are hilarious or adding substantially to the battlefield carnage!
1. Lords of Belganus - Dayboost_
2. Revolting Orphans - RedRover
3. Star Knights - Baconquistador
4. Barbarians - SirSporktimus
5. Adorribles - Nemoto-Sensei
6. Robo-Demons - Ninja_Bait
S. Crimson Eye - Kommander Ken
Reserve an Open Faction and message me your Turn One orders!