Battle of Mount Definitely-not-secretly-a-volcano

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Gorvoslov
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Battle of Mount Definitely-not-secretly-a-volcano

Post by Gorvoslov » Wed Aug 05, 2020 3:23 pm

Turn order will be random each round as determined by the ALMIGHTY D5!

Everyone knows that biome intersections are straight lines and instant changes. If you're not careful when walking through a nice warm desert, suddenly you find yourself in freezing cold snow. Around a totally-not-suspiciously-smoking mountain, there are four of these biome edges. And out of each of these four marches an army, as is prone to happen at any arbitrary border.


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Sitting atop Mount Definitely-not-secretly-a-volcano is a bunch of Kobolds, led by their uuuhhh... leader. He goes by the name of "FIREBOOMSOCOOL!" and wields a big stick with SHINY SHINY SMACKY SMACKY ROCK at the end and a shield made of solid fire because don't apply reason and logic to the actions of Kobolds. Heroic cliche: Fire-obsessed crazy creature with no regard for "Safety"


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Out of the desert comes a herd of poor minimum wage retail workers forced to become part cactus after Karen The Mad Gardener DEMANDED to speak to their managers. Cliche: Karen in a gardening supply store.
Unit special note: Cactuses are always using two hand weapons, deal 1d6 damage if they shove with both hands, and deal 1d6 damage to anyone dumb enough to grab them (Because the last thing anyone wants to ever do in any tabletop game is look up grappling rules.)


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From the frozen snowy lands march up the forces of *REDACTED DUE TO COPYRIGHT* led by their mighty hero *SECOND COPYRIGHT WARNING*. Cliche: Lawyer enforcing copyright... with guns.


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From the forest emerges the kilted madmen out to kilt the world, starting with a mountain of course under the leadership of Bruce Wallace, an enigmatic freedom fighter billionaire crime fighting ninja superhero. Watch out for what's in his utility sporan! Cliche: Any insane thing said about William Wallace and Batman... in a kilt.


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Finally, out of the muddy mud lands emerges with a "pip-pip cheerio righto guvna God save the Queen in time for tea" come the redcoats. Their coats are red. Their officers epitomize being officers, ie, useless. They are led by their hero Sir Tea Baron. Cliche: Every British Stereotype. Just all of them. At the same time.


Overwatch:
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On one side is all the melee factions, on the other is all the ranged factions with the appropriate Kobold squad on that side. Feel free to form inevitable betrayal alliances or pre-emptively betray each other based on those before even forming the alliance. In each biome is also an artefakt of signifikanke to the faction from that biome. The Kobolds don't seem to have one for some totally not suspicious reason.


Factions
Kobolds: Space Bunny
Karen: ProfSrlojohnNinjabait after Turn 3
Kilts: Dienekes22
Copyright Empire: Spectral
Redcoats: Shaggy
Secret Faction: Screech

Turn 1: https://brikwars.com/forums/viewtopic.p ... 83#p363783
Turn 2: https://brikwars.com/forums/viewtopic.p ... 46#p363846
Turn 3: https://brikwars.com/forums/viewtopic.p ... 74#p363974
Turn 4: https://brikwars.com/forums/viewtopic.p ... 25#p364125
Turn 5 (Ending): https://brikwars.com/forums/viewtopic.p ... 27#p364227
Last edited by Gorvoslov on Sat Oct 10, 2020 7:59 pm, edited 8 times in total.

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Shaggy
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Re: Battle of Mount Definitely-not-secretly-a-volcano

Post by Shaggy » Wed Aug 05, 2020 3:25 pm

I’ll take the redcoats!
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Spectral
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Re: Battle of Mount Definitely-not-secretly-a-volcano

Post by Spectral » Wed Aug 05, 2020 3:27 pm

could i grab copyright empire?
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ProfSrlojohn
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Re: Battle of Mount Definitely-not-secretly-a-volcano

Post by ProfSrlojohn » Wed Aug 05, 2020 3:35 pm

I'd like the cactusmen, thank you.
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Dienekes22
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Re: Battle of Mount Definitely-not-secretly-a-volcano

Post by Dienekes22 » Wed Aug 05, 2020 3:36 pm

I want the Kilts
stubby wrote:Oh man, look at these guys. Beautiful units, photos in focus, appropriately cropped, white background... what if I remove all the current photos from the rulebook and just replace everything with these
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Space Bunny
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Re: Battle of Mount Definitely-not-secretly-a-volcano

Post by Space Bunny » Wed Aug 05, 2020 4:00 pm

Gimme whatever's left

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Gorvoslov
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Re: Battle of Mount Definitely-not-secretly-a-volcano

Post by Gorvoslov » Wed Aug 05, 2020 5:51 pm

Alright, Kobolds to Space Bunny. So let's get orders in for this weekend if possible.

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Re: Battle of Mount Definitely-not-secretly-a-volcano

Post by Screech » Wed Aug 05, 2020 6:12 pm

FOR FUCK'S SAKE
I ASK FOR A SPOT IN THE BRIKWARS DISCORD
AND ALL 5 SPOTS GET SNIPED

just throw me in as a secret faction if you can be bothered to
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

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Gorvoslov
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Re: Battle of Mount Definitely-not-secretly-a-volcano

Post by Gorvoslov » Wed Aug 05, 2020 7:45 pm

Screech wrote:
Wed Aug 05, 2020 6:33 pm
just throw me in as a secret faction if you can be bothered to
Sure. Why not. You'll show up at the end of turn 1 or 2 (Depending on how much actually happens on turn 1)

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Kommander Ken
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Re: Battle of Mount Definitely-not-secretly-a-volcano

Post by Kommander Ken » Wed Aug 05, 2020 10:16 pm

That's a really fun use for those Croc-heads. Go Kobolds!

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Re: Battle of Mount Definitely-not-secretly-a-volcano

Post by Bragallot » Thu Aug 06, 2020 3:20 am

This looks excellent. :omnom:
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Kommander Ken wrote:
Mon Dec 28, 2020 9:04 pm
Wtf is this thread?

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Re: Battle of Mount Definitely-not-secretly-a-volcano

Post by ninja_bait » Thu Aug 06, 2020 6:58 am

Not sure if Bruce Wallace is brilliant or a missed opportunity to name him Wayne the Bruce
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Gorvoslov
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Re: Battle of Mount Definitely-not-secretly-a-volcano

Post by Gorvoslov » Thu Aug 06, 2020 9:55 am

ninja_bait wrote:
Thu Aug 06, 2020 6:58 am
Not sure if Bruce Wallace is brilliant or a missed opportunity to name him Wayne the Bruce
You have no idea how long I agonized over whether to emphasize "Wallace" or "The Bruce" for the William Wallace/Robert The Bruce/Bruce Wayne decision. It was seconds even.

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ninja_bait
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Re: Battle of Mount Definitely-not-secretly-a-volcano

Post by ninja_bait » Thu Aug 06, 2020 11:59 am

Gorvoslov wrote:
Thu Aug 06, 2020 9:55 am
You have no idea how long I agonized over whether to emphasize "Wallace" or "The Bruce" for the William Wallace/Robert The Bruce/Bruce Wayne decision. It was seconds even.
Should have doubled down: Bruce Wallace the Bruce
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Gorvoslov
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Re: Battle of Mount Definitely-not-secretly-a-volcano

Post by Gorvoslov » Fri Aug 07, 2020 8:34 pm

Waiting on orders from ProfSrlojohn, then I can do turn 1.

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