Battle of Mount Definitely-not-secretly-a-volcano
Posted: Wed Aug 05, 2020 3:23 pm
Turn order will be random each round as determined by the ALMIGHTY D5!
Everyone knows that biome intersections are straight lines and instant changes. If you're not careful when walking through a nice warm desert, suddenly you find yourself in freezing cold snow. Around a totally-not-suspiciously-smoking mountain, there are four of these biome edges. And out of each of these four marches an army, as is prone to happen at any arbitrary border.
Sitting atop Mount Definitely-not-secretly-a-volcano is a bunch of Kobolds, led by their uuuhhh... leader. He goes by the name of "FIREBOOMSOCOOL!" and wields a big stick with SHINY SHINY SMACKY SMACKY ROCK at the end and a shield made of solid fire because don't apply reason and logic to the actions of Kobolds. Heroic cliche: Fire-obsessed crazy creature with no regard for "Safety"
Out of the desert comes a herd of poor minimum wage retail workers forced to become part cactus after Karen The Mad Gardener DEMANDED to speak to their managers. Cliche: Karen in a gardening supply store.
Unit special note: Cactuses are always using two hand weapons, deal 1d6 damage if they shove with both hands, and deal 1d6 damage to anyone dumb enough to grab them (Because the last thing anyone wants to ever do in any tabletop game is look up grappling rules.)
From the frozen snowy lands march up the forces of *REDACTED DUE TO COPYRIGHT* led by their mighty hero *SECOND COPYRIGHT WARNING*. Cliche: Lawyer enforcing copyright... with guns.
From the forest emerges the kilted madmen out to kilt the world, starting with a mountain of course under the leadership of Bruce Wallace, an enigmatic freedom fighter billionaire crime fighting ninja superhero. Watch out for what's in his utility sporan! Cliche: Any insane thing said about William Wallace and Batman... in a kilt.
Finally, out of the muddy mud lands emerges with a "pip-pip cheerio righto guvna God save the Queen in time for tea" come the redcoats. Their coats are red. Their officers epitomize being officers, ie, useless. They are led by their hero Sir Tea Baron. Cliche: Every British Stereotype. Just all of them. At the same time.
Overview:
On one side is all the melee factions, on the other is all the ranged factions with the appropriate Kobold squad on that side. Feel free to form inevitable betrayal alliances or pre-emptively betray each other based on those before even forming the alliance. In each biome is also an artefakt of signifikanke to the faction from that biome. The Kobolds don't seem to have one for some totally not suspicious reason.
Factions
Kobolds: Space Bunny
Karen:ProfSrlojohnNinjabait after Turn 3
Kilts: Dienekes22
Copyright Empire: Spectral
Redcoats: Shaggy
Secret Faction: Screech
Turn 1: https://brikwars.com/forums/viewtopic.p ... 83#p363783
Turn 2: https://brikwars.com/forums/viewtopic.p ... 46#p363846
Turn 3: https://brikwars.com/forums/viewtopic.p ... 74#p363974
Turn 4: https://brikwars.com/forums/viewtopic.p ... 25#p364125
Turn 5 (Ending): https://brikwars.com/forums/viewtopic.p ... 27#p364227
Everyone knows that biome intersections are straight lines and instant changes. If you're not careful when walking through a nice warm desert, suddenly you find yourself in freezing cold snow. Around a totally-not-suspiciously-smoking mountain, there are four of these biome edges. And out of each of these four marches an army, as is prone to happen at any arbitrary border.
Sitting atop Mount Definitely-not-secretly-a-volcano is a bunch of Kobolds, led by their uuuhhh... leader. He goes by the name of "FIREBOOMSOCOOL!" and wields a big stick with SHINY SHINY SMACKY SMACKY ROCK at the end and a shield made of solid fire because don't apply reason and logic to the actions of Kobolds. Heroic cliche: Fire-obsessed crazy creature with no regard for "Safety"
Out of the desert comes a herd of poor minimum wage retail workers forced to become part cactus after Karen The Mad Gardener DEMANDED to speak to their managers. Cliche: Karen in a gardening supply store.
Unit special note: Cactuses are always using two hand weapons, deal 1d6 damage if they shove with both hands, and deal 1d6 damage to anyone dumb enough to grab them (Because the last thing anyone wants to ever do in any tabletop game is look up grappling rules.)
From the frozen snowy lands march up the forces of *REDACTED DUE TO COPYRIGHT* led by their mighty hero *SECOND COPYRIGHT WARNING*. Cliche: Lawyer enforcing copyright... with guns.
From the forest emerges the kilted madmen out to kilt the world, starting with a mountain of course under the leadership of Bruce Wallace, an enigmatic freedom fighter billionaire crime fighting ninja superhero. Watch out for what's in his utility sporan! Cliche: Any insane thing said about William Wallace and Batman... in a kilt.
Finally, out of the muddy mud lands emerges with a "pip-pip cheerio righto guvna God save the Queen in time for tea" come the redcoats. Their coats are red. Their officers epitomize being officers, ie, useless. They are led by their hero Sir Tea Baron. Cliche: Every British Stereotype. Just all of them. At the same time.
Overview:
On one side is all the melee factions, on the other is all the ranged factions with the appropriate Kobold squad on that side. Feel free to form inevitable betrayal alliances or pre-emptively betray each other based on those before even forming the alliance. In each biome is also an artefakt of signifikanke to the faction from that biome. The Kobolds don't seem to have one for some totally not suspicious reason.
Factions
Kobolds: Space Bunny
Karen:
Kilts: Dienekes22
Copyright Empire: Spectral
Redcoats: Shaggy
Secret Faction: Screech
Turn 1: https://brikwars.com/forums/viewtopic.p ... 83#p363783
Turn 2: https://brikwars.com/forums/viewtopic.p ... 46#p363846
Turn 3: https://brikwars.com/forums/viewtopic.p ... 74#p363974
Turn 4: https://brikwars.com/forums/viewtopic.p ... 25#p364125
Turn 5 (Ending): https://brikwars.com/forums/viewtopic.p ... 27#p364227
