Teleports
After a terrible round of teleports last turn, this turn starts of with some ungodly good rolls:
7 Portals (out of 8 ) activate, most with the max amount of demons.
The two portals at the top of the tower activate
And a Cloud of Cacodemons emerges from them.
Two Imps Teleport in near the Bloodfalls.
On the other side, a group of Unwilling Zombies show up.
2 more Zombie Soldiers, joined by a Cacodemon, teleport in near the Heroes' starting zone
Not pictured: Two additional Demon Troopers, a Zombie Footsoldier and a Zombie Scientist Teleport in to aid Lucivyr, while two more Mobsters use a Portal to join with Luigi.
All these new teleport activations shake the network and Dasher's bullet from Turn 1 comes shooting out.
It deals massive damage and penetrates two Cacodemon skulls.
Immortals
"Alright. Looks like it's time for us to leave."
The buried Immortal gets free from the concrete and jumps up to distract Bertinator.
Kelly uses the opportunity to Blast him in the back.
Luckily for bert, the armored Grunt is near enough to take the shot for him.
The Immortals go arount the house of pain to capture what loot they can.
"Congratulations, you are being rescued. please do not resist"
Minigun Fucking Santa is also being rescued. He goes over to the next cell and grabs the dead marine's BFG.
The Immortals and their loot then teleport out of Hell.
Studland
"That wasn't nice. Ah, well. might as well see if they missed anything"
While Bert looks through the house of Pain, the rocketeer unleashes her load that she had stored up over the last few turns.
The explosion kicks Buzz right out the entrance again. Two of her Cultists get vaporized, a third one has to jump in to save her from the fire.
Bert does find one cell that the Immortals didn't loot. Inside there's a dead Magikstrate officer, as well as a loating soul orb.
Bert grab's the officer's gun and the blue ball, then he leaves the house.
"Hey, demon Nerv! Since real Nerv is gone anyways, there's no point fighting over him anymore. Might conjuring me up a bike with those fancy devil powers of yours?"
"if you want to break your own neck, be my guest."
"Alright, thanks buddy!"
Bert jumps onto his new bike and starts stunt-driving around the pillar nearby.
Skion
Elyana channels her magik into the Bloodfalls. She summons a bridge of blood, floating between the platform the Heroes are currently standing on and the one with all the Cacos.
The Skion troopers don't look overly convinced that this bridge will hold them, but they are willing to follow their leader and charge ahead.
While running up the bridge, they shoot another Cacodemon.
Lucivyr and Friends
The formerly undead, now totally dead engineer gets re-undeaded by Lucivyr.
He jumps down from the tower and starts repairing the Cyberdemonette's cybernetics.
The Scientist sees an opportunity to shoot two heroes with one Shotgun blast. Sadly, he fails to hurt either of them.
The troopers and Footsoldier are a bit more successful. Two of them target down one of the Brootals on top of the house, while the third one fails to do anything noteworthy.
Space Cops
"Alright, that's enough Teleports now. You, get to that portal. Hack it. Make sure nothing gets through without our approval."
Officer Spongelove Craftpants manages to carry out Dasher's order - all other portals are deactivated for now. However, messing with the teleport network allowed something else to get through.
A Cyberdemon tumbles backwards through the Portal. He looks a bit disoriented.
The Cyber is shortly followed by two very strange looking Marines.
"Greetings Everyone!"
Ignoring what just happens, the cops fire at the Cacodemon above them.
The creature is knocked down from its platform and dies after crashing into the ground.
Demons - Group 1
The Cyberdemon fires 2 rockets at the two speedy Marines, but both of them manage to dodge in time.
"Strafe left to avoid the Cyber's rockets. Then, while it's reloading, pump as many rockets into the demon as you can. Remember, Cybers take reduced splash damage, so this might take a while."
"Punch the Cyber's Booty!"
Demons - Group 2
The two Zombie Soldiers shoot down at the Cops.
Both of them hit, crit and kill their target. Both long ranged cops are down, including Spongelove.
The Horde of Unwilling charge the brootals. Their opponents swords can't hit the Zombies.
One Brootal falls to the overwhealming numbers of the undead.
Demons - Group 3
The two Imps come around the Bloodfalls. both throw fireballs at MadMario (only one of them hits him, though.)
But one of the Mercenaries above jumps down to intercept the projectile mid-air.
Demons - Group 4
The remaining Cacodemons swarm Skion.
Response fire from one of the Skion troopers kills a cacodemon before they themselves can attack.
The remaining Caco shoots a ball of plasma at one of the gunners.
The Soldier gets cooked by the Caco's spit attack.
Cult of Cain
Betty tries to roast some more spiders, but her next incendiaty grenade misses by a long shot.
The Cultists keep trying to kill me. They keep failing to hit, too.
Buzz Super-charges her Buzzsaw-staff and goes after Bert.
But hitting him while he rides around in circles seems to be a problem.
Demons - Group 5
The Mobsters try to shoot Bert off his motorcycle but, just like Buzz before them, fail to do enough damage.
MadMario's Mercs
MadMario goes into his super form - aka he pretends to be Super Mario this turn.
out of nowhere, a box appears in front of him, which he jumps on top of.
From there, he jumps to the higher platform and runs along it, past the Cacodemon and into the red teleporter.
One level above, he re-materializes and jumps to the newly created flagpole.
He drops down from the flagpole and into the big portal. Seconds after, he finds himself in another area.
And there, in front of him, he can see the Chainsaw the heroes are looking for.
The rest of the Mercenaries follow Skion up the Blood bridge.
Brootals
The Brootals that got jumped by the Zombies run towards the orange portal, after failing to kill any of the demons around them.
Meanwhile, the heavy gunner on top of the house of pain kills two of Lucivyr's Troopers.
"This, throwin' stuff, i'nt working. You's got to do everything y'self."
The Boss grabs his own hair, and throws himself towards the main platform. Against all logic, he succeeds and soars through the air like a gravity defying, coffee-bean looking eagle.
After landing on the platform, he gets up and shoots the Caco up there in the back.
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Skion and Mercs - those who are still alive, are on top of Elyanas blood bridge.
Malevolence, Coincident and Decino are duking it out near the Space Cops, two Zombiemen are also still alive over here.
Speaking off the Space cops, they took quite a beating this turn.
Lucivyr and his Zombies are still hanging around the house of pain, trying to fix the Cyber. The Studland Rocketeer is also still around, hiding in the tower.
Bert's driving circles around the Mob, as Bert does.
And there's still a ton of Zombies here, as well as two very outgunned Brootals.
I survive another round of Cultists trying to kill me. No, I did not fudge the rolls here, I honestly want them to succeed because it'd be hilarious
