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Location: King Mieszko Park, Planet Jarocin, Unified Republik of Poland
Mission: Party hard like no tomorrow


It's Halloween! For some it's the time to celebrate carnage and destruction and for others it's just yet another occasion to get totally shit-faced! Thus, a small community on Planet Jarocin decided to organize a party in their city park and dress up as something more or less spooky to get in the mood.


The local act 'Pig Strangler' is performing at said party. Even though it's still not quite clear whether the band members are just artists in costumes or real demon, the party goers don't seem to bother with it too much.


Even the kids are prepared for this day!
Kid in LechBlue costume: "LechBlue is the best Ranger!"
Kid in LechBlack costume: "Blue is a nerd! Black at least was a pro boxer!"


Kid in LechBlue costume: "Oh yeah?! We'll see about that!"
Concerned Mom: "Kids please, I've spent weeks on sewing these suits in the first place!"


Cave Girl: "Are you sure these costumes are appropriate for that party?!"
Cave Man: "Trust me, couple costumes are the biggest hit, nowadays!"


Pirate Captain: "Did you really ditch me for that... freak?!"
Pirate Queen: "Sorry, looks likes he's more like the type of man I've been looking for."
Zombie Pirate Captain: "Grr..."


Booze and bowls of chili are all ready for the guests.


Even Janitor Stubby is on spot but already busy after a few minutes in.


Everything is going smoothly and all the folks seem to enjoy themselves until...


*RUMBLE*


Oh fuck, it's skeletons!!
Cave Girl: "This is bad..."
Janitor Stubby: "Geez, it's the third skeleton outbreak this week already!"


Bone Reaper: "Brothers! These fuccbois have been occupying this very graveyard, the place of our final rest! Time to reclaim what was once ours!"

Overview:

Been bored over the last days, so I've been paying against myself after realizing that this year's HH has too few entries. The Party Goers have Janitor Stubby acting as their hero, whereas the Bone Reaper acts at the one for the Skeletons. Each team's objective is to stay alive and kill as many figs from the opposing team.

All turns have been played out but will be posted in subsequent posts.

TURN 1:

Two bone archers fire at the caveman couple but fail to harm either of them.


A bonezerker charges the pirate captain but fails to harm him.


However, he's ultimately wrecked by the pirate's sabre in an counter attack.


The bonezerker with the heavy hammer hits cyber girl but doesn't do her any harm.


Neither does the bone archer behind him.


The evil witch and the tarot lady are both taken out by the last two bone archers.


Stubby is attacked by two bonezerkers and looses a HP. A counter attack by the janitor misses his target.


The Bone Reaper casts a resurrection spell on the bonezerker that was just struck down by the captain.


If works at first but...
Bonezerker: "Woah woah, you're not paying me enough to stand up and fight yet again! You're even worse than these fuccbois over there!"
Bone Reaper: "..."
Looks like that bonezerker just joined the enemy team (FEAT CRITICALLY FAILED)


To show his new allegiance, he borrows the hat from the pirate captain.


The kids in the LechRanger costumes head towards the park.
Kid in LechBlack costume: "Alright, let's show these skellies what true heroes are made off!"
Concerned Mom: "Please, stay outside of the park. This place doesn't look safe at all!"


The fright knight moves up and grabs all his stuff next to the tub of water.


Fright knight just smashed a bone archer with his mace.


The caveman couple engages both bone archers in close combat with one biting the dust.


Zombie pirate captain heads attempts to help the cave girl by killing that bone archer but fails to do any damage.


Bar keeper is preparing some fire bombs while chef is stirring some nice chili.


However, the chef somehow goofed and ends up igniting himself.


Dressed-up bonezerker just killed one of his fellows to free Stubby who in return kills another zerker with his mop.


The party goers next to the stage move to battle in order to form a mosh pit there.


And the band keeps playing.

Overview:


Stubby: 2/3 HP
Bone Reaper: 3/3 HP

Party Goers: 5 kills
Skeletons: 2 kills

TURN 2:

The chef got shit out of luck and already burned to death. A small "kurwa" can be heard from the bar keeper mourning his friends death.


One bonezerker just killed the fright knight whereas a bone archer executed the traitor bonezerker.


A combined attack of the hammer bonezerker and a bone archer also killed the cyber girl.


The Bone Reaper lunges with his sickle at the zombie pirate and it turns out he was a real zombie, after all. Looks like the pirate queen has a lot to explain to her other boyfriend.


The barkeeper grabs one of his fire bombs and hurls it at the skeletons.


The hammer skelly instantly burned to death and a bone archer caught fire.


The cave man couple attacks another bone archer but without any effect.


The pirate couple fires at yet another bone archer and manages to kill him in the end.


Stubby: "Can't you see that you're oozing up this whole place?!"
Bone Reaper: "Huh?! I have no clue what you-"


Bone Reaper: "AAHHH!!"
Before he can end his sentence, the Bone Reaper gets all the gunk oozing out of his lower body mopped up by the janitor...


...leaving him practically crippled and resulting into a lost HP (FEAT CRITICALLY SUCCESSFUL).
Bone Reaper: "Ah! Turn me back to normal, you jerk!"


The demon couple gangs up on the Bone Reaper but the attack is ultimately soaked up by the nearby bone archer.


The kids further head to battle.
Concerned Mom: "I'm begging you, please! Turn back at once, kids!"


President Pumpkin, Arachno Man and Cock Goblin all head to salvage the weaponry dropped by the bonezerkers.


And this kid is still stuck in a pile of poop (hey look, it even matches the colour of his pants).


The band still keeps playing but who did just enter the battlefield to the right hand side of the stage?


A band of rogue vampires led by Vapour Bat, of course! The time came right to prey on the mortals to get their daily fix of fresh blood!


However, an emergency unit led by Wilhelm Blazkowicz is on its way to intercept all incoming danger and prevent further civilian losses.
Wilhelm Blazkowicz: "All I wanted is spending the holidays with my family at home and now I gotta break that promise because some Piltogg fucks decided to pop up and harass some unsuspecting civilians!"


Sergeant: "Um, it's skeletons and vampires this time, no nazis..."
Wilhelm Blazkowicz: "I'm pretty certain that there's nazis among these skeletons and if you think about it, vampire is just another word for Piltogg, thinking about it".
Sergeant: "Hmpf, if you say so..."

Overview:


Stubby: 2/3 HP
Bone Reaper: 2/3 HP

Party Goers: 8 kills
Skeletons: 7 kills

TURN 3:

The last bonezerker tries to attack Stubby who immediately retaliates with his mop ans strikes down the skeleton.


However, the ignited bone archer sets the janitor on fire.


The Bone Reaper tries to cast a spell to reassemble a new body out of the corpses of the fallen but nothing at all happens (FEAT FAILED).


The lit bone archer just burnt down.


And Stubbs just mops the fire away.


A couple of party goers try to beat up the Bone Reaper who amazingly survives this forceful attack!
Concerned Mom: "You really shouldn't be doing that, kids!"


The pirates and Arachno Man fire at the Bone Reaper but fail to do any harm, as well.


Cock Goblin makes himself useful by digging up the kid stuck in the poop.


Said kid immediately grabs a few weapons dropped by the skeletons.


The bar keeper sprints towards the gates of the park with two fire bombs in his hands.


Vampires move up...


...and one of the impalers manages to get in range to kill Arachno Man.


Soldiers move up, as well.


Everyone dumps their fire on Vapour Bat but the entire damage output is soaked up by a redshirt.

Overview:

Stubby: 2/3 HP
Bone Reaper: 2/3 HP
Wilhelm Blazkowicz: 3/3 HP
Vapour Bat: 3/3 HP

Party Goers: 10 kills
Skeletons: 7 kills
Army: 1 kill
Vampires: 1 kill

TURN 4:

Even more party goers dogpile on the Bone Reaper...


...and at last he was killed for good!
Concerned Mom: "..."


The bar keeper sprints towards the vampires with his fire bombs in hand.


"Redshirt this!" he shouted as he lobbed both bombs at Vapour Bat, dealing one HP of damage and setting him on fire.


With one lucky shot, the pirate queen inflicted incredibly high damage to Vapour Bat!


Who simply vanished without leaving a trace...
Vapour Bat: "*fading echo* This is not over yet!"


The remaining impalers move up to nail down the bar keeper and the pirate queen. Guess we'll never find out why she wanted to date the zombie pirate.


The soldiers rush forward and make quick work out of the vampires, leaving only one impaler alive.

Overview:


Stubby: 2/3 HP
Bone Reaper: 0/3 HP
Wilhelm Blazkowicz: 3/3 HP
Vapour Bat: 0/3 HP

Party Goers: 12 kills
Skeletons: 7 kills
Army: 3 kill
Vampires: 3 kill

At this point I just wrapped up the battle since there was only one single fig opposing the civvies. I think I should have left out the military out of this, as the party goers easily managed to deal with the monsters by themselves in the end. I still hope you enjoyed reading through this report, nevertheless.

EPILOGUE:

Impaler: "Woah, woah... stay away from me!"


Impaler: "Look, it's the season and we vampires need our fix of blood once in a whi-"


*FLOCK*
Wilhelm Blazkowicz: "Piltogg scum!"


Wilhelm Blazkowicz: "Alright guys, job's done! Let's head home ASAP!"
Polish Soldier: "No kurde, nareszcie!"


After the folks from the army gave an all-clear signal, the survivors head back to form a mosh pit in front of the stage, as if nothing happened. Stubby does his part by cleaning up all the mess that just happened a while ago. As for the concerned mom...


Kid in LechBlue costume: "Hey mom, are you alright? You're looking rather pale..."
Concerned Mom: "..."
Kid in LechBlack costume: "I fear there won't be much 'Trick or Treat' this year. Maybe it's best we bring mom back home."
Kid in LechBlue costume: *nods*

*FIRST TIME JUDGE ANXIETY INTENSIFIES*

I will update this soon, as I've asked for some clarification from Zuppon about judging.

6: Gameplay

I can't judge this yet as I don't understand just what this category pertains to. Is it the range of stuff from the rules we see in the game? Is it how creatively the rules were used? I don't know and I don't want to just make up my own definition and skew your score.

7: Photography

A lot of these are really good. Like this.



The subject is crystal clear and in focus, and with nothing else to distract me a whole lot. Buuuuuut...



Others look like that. There's this recurring problem I see where when one of the shots is blurry, it's blurry all over. I know in my shoot I had issues where the wrong thing would come into focus, but here it's just a blurring across the image.



Then some shots look like this, where sunlight was reflecting off something in the shot. The result is this bright streak that distracts my eyes from the ossum.

Yet these issues are minor, so after tearing myself up over it I deem it a solid 4.2/5.

8: Violence

Good in terms of the effects you used.



In particular I liked that.

However, there were some things that detracted from it for me. Mop-man was boring to me. I guess because I'm not as immersed into the Brikverse as most, seeing the guy closest to a protagonist kill enemies with a mop instead of, say, a fuckhueg somethin-or-other 9000 didn't raise my eyebrows. My bigger issue is that none of the kills felt visceral. What do I mean by that? Nowhere did I find myself imagining the sounds of people getting ripped apart, blood spattering, etc. Saying this gives me a feelsbad because I don't know how to describe in what way(s) it could be corrected. I think a combination of more aggressive figure posing (attacker pose + victim reaction) and different camera angles would have done it for me.



Like this shot. Cavegirl looks bored while skeleton crossbow looks like he could be doing a 1000-yard stare. The violence would have been more compelling if, say, the shot was over cavegirl's shoulder with the club on the skelly's chest or head. Skelly could have his arms back and head to one side, and cavegirl's bored look would be hidden due to the angle it was taken.

Overall, straight 4.

9: Writing

It's a small scale story meant to set up an otherwise gratuitous brawl in a public place. It does that well. Also, the little Lechranger arc was undiluted ossum. I got grabbed by that subplot more than anything because it felt like such a badass Halloween story about two kids who get to live out their heroes' deeds in the fucking costumes! And then the payoff with the frozen mom was brilliant. The problems I have are a few spelling/grammar errors scattered around that made me blink and reread the text, and a few things don't make much sense. For example, why would the vampires show up to a place where the 'umies are krumping serious undead 'eads? That, and some things feel like wasted potential. Like the setup was there but no payoff (more on that later). I.e. we get introduced to cool characters but little gets done with them. Nothing happened with the band when it would have bee interesting to see if they were demons or not; maybe they side with the skeletons, maybe the skeletons demand the demons help them only to find out they're just musicians. The cavepeople also provided good setup. I honestly thought at some point the caveman was gonna thump a skelly before saying, "I toldja, babe, that we'd be the biggest hit."

But returning to my initial point, that the writing effectively sets the stage for what's about to happen, it was good. Great setup to have everyone in costumes. 4/5.

10: Overall Appeal

It's such an anticlimax. There's this ossum setup that's genuinely one of the cooler set-pieces I've seen here, with all the little characters and whatnot, and the good violence that follows, but the payoff is just "one side pwns the other, then the army arrives and pwns some more."

If you look at the last setup overview shot, the skeletons are surrounded by their enemies, which seems to have setup things to end this way. I don't think you intended this to happen since you commented on it at the end, though.

This thing actually reminds me a lot of the famous 4chan battle, right down to the civvies pwning so much face that the army guys are basically not needed.

That said though, I love the colors here and the attention to detail you did with the environment. Every few shots I'd slow down and just enjoy the colors and the scene.

Overall, 3.5.

I'll be updating this with a new post to jump it back to the top when I get word from Zuppon about gameplay. Sick work for something thrown together out of boredom.

'Kay, so Gamplay:

It ties with a lot of stuff I already wrote about. This does not look like would have been much fun to play given how one-sided it was, for two players anyway. Not sure how much you enjoyed it and that's from reading.

The creativity with the units was really nice though. I liked the janitor-on-ghost action especially. Been a while since I've seen hentai that kinky.

I also don't detect much strategy either, besides the "eliminate nearest thing" that this kind of 'bad guys suddenly appear' scenario leans toward. I found myself more engaged in the little sub-plots that were going on and whether they were going to be resolved than the going of the battle.

3/5.

FINAL THOUGHTS AND OVERALL SCORE

Fuck judging, man. I hate finding faults in cool shit that got worked on hard and I tried to be as objective as I could manage. Looking at Brikwars from a critical point of view sucks the ossum out of it.

Anyways, my final score for this comes to 3.74.

Gameplay: 3/5
Photography: 4/5
Violence: 4/5
Writing: 3/5
Overall Appeal: 3.5/5

While I won't go as in-depth as my judgely brother above, I'd say this was a fun Hallow's Eve battle! The demon band was my all-time favorite, providing appropriate music the whole time as I imagine it. The characters written up for this were fun and witty, especially the kids in the ranger costumes.

Kommander Ken wrote: While I won't go as in-depth as my judgely brother above,

Lol! I know right? I had no idea what I was doing and went totally overboard with it!

I didn't say it as a bad thing! Personally I thought it was refreshing when compared to the norm.

Kommander Ken wrote:Gameplay: 3/5
Photography: 4/5
Violence: 4/5
Writing: 3/5
Overall Appeal: 3.5

While I won't go as in-depth as my judgely brother above, I'd say this was a fun Hallow's Eve battle! The demon band was my all-time favorite, providing appropriate music the whole time as I imagine it. The characters written up for this were fun and witty, especially the kids in the ranger costumes.

Is the Overall Appeal category supposed to be a 3/5 or a 3.5/5?

Woops. Fixed!

Im at a slight disadvantage, because my iPod is probably my age or older, but here we go...

Gameplay: 3.65/5
Photography: 4/5
Violence: 4/5
Writing: 4/5
Overall appeal: 3.95/5
Reasoning: I thoroughly enjoyed reading this.