I will return (for reals, I swear)!

[Duerer]

I will return!
Janna Kowalska: "After a two year long period of silence ans stalemates on both Eastern fronts, news of two simultaneous operations behind enemy lines just made the wave. According to the Armed Forces of the Unified Republik, a team of five commandos and a naval commander successfully managed to rescue the captured General Stanisław Sosabowski from a high security prison on Planet Alytus. At the same time, a small joint force of the Order of Dobrzyń and the Order of Szent Erzsébet was sent out to the Planet Kaunas to eliminate two high range missiles with a deadly virus inside."

I will return!
Janna Kowalska: "Even though the majority of the population feels relieved after the news of the latter operation's success, skeptical voices criticize the lack of preventive measures in spite of the Armed Forces and Government's knowledge about these missiles. Prezydent Sadow is currently giving answers to questions regarding these incidents. We're switching now to the respective news conference on Nowa Warszawa."

I will return!
Reporter: "Miss President, haven't you considered any countermeasures against these missiles knowing very well about them?"
Małgorzata Sadow: "We did consider several possible measures, in fact. However it's all easier said than done. These missiles were confirmed to be of a fairly new type, capable of bypassing most modern laser defense grids."

I will return!
Another Reporter: "Have you considered the possibility of any further missiles strikes by the Lietuvans in the near future?"
Małgorzata Sadow: "To our knowledge, the Lietuvans possess no armed Neptūnas-class missiles at the moment. However, as we cannot allow them to set up any more of these, we have to react as swift as possible-"

I will return!
Yet Another Reporter: "Do you mean-"
Małgorzata Sadow: "Yes! We are about to wage a full attack on the Greater Empire of Lietuva! We deemed that Vytautas Blinda is too much of a threat to the entire sector as that he is allowed to do as he pleases."

I will return!
Vytautas Blinda: *grumble-grumble*

I will return!
Valdas Braggus: "What's the situation, sir? Everything alright?"
Vytautas Blinda: "Do things around here look alright to you?! Not only did we lose a ton of POWs including Sosabowski and that little shit Žemaitis, but we also lost a lot of good men on Kaunas while defending our inter-planetary missiles. And these are now gone, as well!"

I will return!
Vytautas Blinda: "And now that they know that we have no more secret weapons to keep them in check, the Poles are going for a full on attack on our core worlds!"
Valdas Braggus: "Ah, that's what I was about to address!"
Vytautas Blinda: "Whatcha on about?"

I will return!
Valdas Braggus: "Well, Tadas and his fellow brethren from the Vermilion Paladins have something special in store for you."
Vytautas Blinda: "How special?"
Valdas Braggus: "To put it short: we are about to call upon a phenomenon that defies every currently set law of physics."

I will return!
Vytautas Blinda: "Hmpf, I'm not fully sold but I guess I'll take a look. However, if you just end up wasting my time then..."

[ninja_bait]

hm! So intriguing...

[Scribonius]

hm! So intriguing...

Indeed! Von Bragg clones are everywhere... I suppose I had better make one of my own one of these days...

[Archduke]

looks very cool. If there's anything I can do to help, just ask

[Zupponn]

hm! So intriguing...

Indeed! Von Bragg clones are everywhere... I suppose I had better make one of my own one of these days...

Two good, easy to make characters are Warhead shards and Von Brag clones. I like it when people include them in their stuff.

[Duerer]

Location: Planet Vilnius, Greater Empire of Lietuva
Mission: Inspect the new potential ultimate weapon

I will return!
Vytautas Blinda: "So, this thing is supposed to call upon a phenomenon that defies every currently set law of physics, right?"
Valdas Braggus: "Well, yes. The Paladins just recently dug it out and set it up here."
Vytautas Blinda: "And do does it exactly work?"

I will return!
Tadas the Infernal: "Allow me to explain it for you. What stands right here is an ancient portal to another dimension. With the right resources and tools at hand, we can tap on the power of said dimension."
Vytautas Blinda: "What do you mean by 'tap on the power' of a dimension?"

I will return!
Tadas the Infernal: "We have no clue what exactly lies beneath that portal, so if we simply open it up with no afterthought, we would unleash unspeakable horrors upon our own dimension and getting us all killed in a very... let's say ugly fashion."
Vytautas Blinda: "Woah, what the fuck! No way we're going to use that thing!"
Valdas Braggus: "Hang on! This is where the tapping comes to play! Go on, Tadas!"

I will return!
Tadas the Infernal: "My master, the Great High Paladin Gintaras, has thoroughly researched the nature and history of the portal in order to develop a ritual to draw energy from the dimension and empower ourselves with it, without letting half of its inhabitants out!"
Valdas Braggus: "And thanks to the trans-dimensional navigation node I created, we can easily set the duration and intensity of the portal's energy output. That way we can safely make use of the powers that lie beyond. A truly ingeniuos combination of science and magic!"

I will return!
High Paladin Gintaras: "In order to break the seals on this thing, we have to gather a certain amount of blood for the ritual, however."
Vytautas Blinda: "Hey, sounds easy as pie then! I'll just scrape together a bunch of prisoners and hobos for the sacrifice and-"
High Paladin Gintaras: "NO! No! It's not that easy! When we are are about to lift the seal on the portal, we need to call upon the power of the demons of war! And they demand blood spilled in the heat of battle! A mere blood sacrifice won't suffice!"
Vytautas Blinda: "Then let them beat each other up, beforehand. Geez..."
Valdas Braggus: "Wouldn't that be kinda cheating, though?"

I will return!
High Paladin Gintaras: "Sir Braggus is right. The demons demand the blood to be spilled in a real battle! A real battle of epic scale!"
Vytautas Blinda: "Wait, what is that supposed to mean?"
High Paladin Gintaras: "We have to gather the blood of the fallen warriors during battle, as opposed to just offering some random hobos. But fear not, the extraction of said blood can be done remotely."
Vytautas Blinda: "No, I mean the 'battle of epic scale' part."
High Paladin Gintaras: "Well uhm, with the Poles quickly approaching our home worlds, it's just a matter of time until they arrive on this planet. Once they set their feet on Vilnius, however, we can use the blood spilled in the impending battle to break the seal on the portal in no time."

I will return!
Vytautas Blinda: "Why do we have to wait for them to strike first? Can't we just lift it out of this cave and transport it to some other system or even fry it up in orbit, before they have a chance to strike at our capital?"
Valdas Braggus: "Do you have any clue how hard it is to re-calibrate the machinery is, after moving that thing from A to B? And I have no clue how that thing might even work in orbit, given that it's a way different environment we're dealing."
Tadas the Infernal: "Least we could do is lifting that thing up to the surface leaving enough time to reconfigure the portal before the incoming onslaught."

I will return!
Vytautas Blinda: "Ugh... Don't tell about any further delays and just make sure we can put this thing to use in order to put odds in our favour once more!"

[ninja_bait]

lotta interdimensional stuff going on in the Brikverse right now

[Duerer]

Location: Ruins of the Missile Launch Facility, Planet Kaunas, Greater Empire of Lietuva
Mission: Find out what is going on

While the coalition forces made it out of the secret missile launch complex in time, most of the Lietuvan forces were trapped inside only to be overrun by yellow blokbots. Only few guards and lab personnel made it out before the onslaught. Due to extensive damage on the computers inside, the entire system went haywire and accidentally launched both missiles in the silos albeit with shut doors. Although the weedkiller virus inside has been neutralized, the missiles themselves still had enough explosive power to wreck the entire complex. However, not everyone died in the giant explosion tearing through the bunker, as some of the Lietuvans managed to emerge from the ruins. For the better or worse...
I will return!

I will return!
Irena Mielkutė: "Ugh... my body feels so heavy... Why am I still alive..."

I will return!
Irena Mielkutė: "Hey, what's wrong with my arm? It's all red!"

I will return!
Irena Mielkutė: "*looks at herself* What's wrong with my whole body though?! My beautiful stature!"

I will return!
Dr. Aras Gabrys: "Irena! You're alright! We're not doomed after all!"
Irena Mielkutė: "No, no! Nothing here is alright! My beautiful body is ruined! I look like an ugly lump of-!"
Dr. Aras Gabrys: "Huh, how could that happen?"

I will return!
Irena Mielkutė: "You, as well! We both have been turned into walking blocks!"
Dr. Aras Gabrys: "Oh, now that you mention it... But what would be the cause of it all?"
Blokbot: "..."

I will return!
Irena Mielkutė: "*click* GET BACK!"
Blokbot: "..."
Dr. Aras Gabrys: "Hang in there! I don't think it's trying to harm us!"

I will return!
Irena Mielkutė: "What?! It's a friggin' blokbot! How could it possibly NOT try to harm us?!"
Dr. Aras Gabrys: "Look! If it wanted to it had done so already, but right now it's vegetating here and gazing at us for some reason!"
Irena Mielkutė: "How could it gaze on us if it has no eyes to begin with?!!"

I will return!
Blue guy: "I have no eyes or face yet I see clearly! What the fucked happened to me?!!"
Another blue guy: "You too?! Did we just all turn into block people?!"
Blue guy: "Just look at this guy, over here! he's all blocks aside from his legs!"
Another blue guy: "*shudders* Eugh!"
Dr. Aras Gabrys: "Could it be..."

I will return!
Irena Mielkutė: "Yeah?!"
Dr. Aras Gabrys: "If my assumption is correct, then the exposure to the mixture of the chemicals inside the lab and the blokbot remains altered our genes..."
Irena Mielkutė: "No... no way..."
Dr. Aras Gabrys: "... and mixed them with the ones of the blokbots leading to a truly unique mutation.

I will return!
Irena Mielkutė: "No, no, NO!!"
*VROOM*

I will return!
Dr. Aras Gabrys: "Woah! Do it again!"
Irena Mielkutė: "Do what?"
Dr. Aras Gabrys: "You were just spewing out flames out of nowhere. Do it again, please!"
Irena Mielkutė: "No clue, what you're on about doc but-"

I will return!
*VROOM*
Irena Mielkutė: "Woah shit, you're right doc!"
Dr. Aras Gabrys: "Thinking about it, weren't you shoved into that huge fire by the chief librarian at the time? Looks like you absorbed the flames during the mutation process and gained pyrokinetic abilities as a result."
Irena Mielkutė: "I kinda doubt that mutations and genetics really work that way but in the end, who cares? This stuff's terrific!"

I will return!
Irena Mielkutė: "But what are we supposed to do now? In this shape there's no way we can return to high command. At this point we're just freaks, nothing more than any random blokbot!"
Dr. Aras Gabrys: "If that's the case than we shall assimilate everyone standing in our path!"
Irena Mielkutė: "The hell?!"
Dr. Aras Gabrys: "Now that we are one with the blokbots, we definitely should have the ability to assimilate our foes' bio-mass and reprocess it into the likes of us! That way we will lay the foundation for a new world, where everyone will be one with the block! Hehe... Hehehe..."
Irena Mielkutė: "Doc... are you OK?!"

I will return!
Dr. Aras Gabrys: "Fuhahaha! HAHAHAHAHAHA!"
While retaining most of his intellect during the mutation process, Dr. Aras Gabrys still inherited the blokbots' instinct to devour and consume every piece of bio mass and turn it into more blokbots or in this case, mutants. Due to his already apparent maniacal tendencies this instinct kicked in sooner than the one of his fellow mutant. Will the sector... or even the entire galaxy be ready for the impending onslaught of blokbot hybrids?

[ninja_bait]

that is not the return I was expecting

[Arkbrik]

Very nice

[Bragallot]

The Block People are genuinely terrifying.

A Von Brag clone dabbling in faux science and demonic magik, I'm sure nothing can go wrong.

[Scribonius]

I approve of this idea.

You found a use for the blockbodies, and it. Is. AWESOME. I can't wait to see where this goes!

[Venge]

Haven't the Lietuvans ever seen Event Horizon? What could possibly go wrong with opening a literal portal to Hell, lol.

[ReconMiner]

I was wondering when someone was gonna do something BrikWars with those bodies, looks awesome!