Synopsis of the events so far:
Spoiler
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Engineers from the Free Village-State of Linkingrad are racing to develop spaceflight capabilities in what is affectionately called the "village space programme". However, in a land where resources are scarce, they struggle to obtain requisite parts, and an energy source powerful enough to propel a spaceship into the stars. Bric Vignette (Editor-in-Chief of the Linkingrad Courier) dreams of becoming an Astral Adventurer and has persuaded the Master of Technologies to build him an AI-powered mortar for defence against cosmic horrors - which may be needed sooner than expected, as strange things start happening in the realm. First, a patient mysteriously disappears during an appointment with Dr Augmentin Mol, the town's only medik; a little later, in the dangerous Downlands, a squad of alien travelers from the faraway Republic of Studland seem to materialise out of nowhere. They are set upon by an ancient monster, but manage to get away with the help of ace pilot Aurora Aerheart. Back in Linkingrad, Dr Mol, plagued by nightmares about the vanishing client, decides to enlist Bric's help in investigating the case. A call for information regarding mysterious disappearances goes out in the Courier, and a mysterious talking tree responds by giving Bric a map to be given to Dr Mol. The map is purported to lead to something very important...
Nothing To See Here
AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!! Mortars ain't made to be strapped to the outside of BLEEEPing planes you massive bellBEEP!!! You're not even a BLEEPing pilot! WE'RE GONNA DIIIIEEEEEE
"Ha! I can hear you're excited about this adventure, Morty! This is going to be ossum! Believe me, once we find the very important thing and report back to Dr Mol, he's not going to mind that we didn't tell him about the map. Why bother him like that, anyway? He's a very busy man, have you seen the queues outside the clinic? One time, I was walking past it and I saw a wizard whose arms had turned into literal spaghetti! Though I tell you, the sharkman behind him was the one who really looked like a fish out of water! Meanwhile, his pet glibley had escaped and was trying to bite off the wizard's- Oh! I think I see a place where we could land! Hold on!"
BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!!
"Right, these look like the Hardback Mountains that Mr Talking Tree's map marks out as the location of the super important thing. What do you think, Morty?"
What do I THINK, Bric? I think you're the most gullible BLEEPing pillock I've ever met! A BEEPing talking tree? Do you hear yourself, man?
"Right, let's see now... I reckon if we follow the pass just ahead and then turn 30 degrees west, no, hang on... Ha, it was upside down! So, 30 degrees east..."
What in the name of Two-by-Two...
Oh, hell no!
DOOF!
Ha ha ha, booyah! That's what I'm talkin' about! Take that, ya dehydrated teletubby!
"Hey, what's all the noise about, friend? You know, it's best to try and not make a racket like that in the mountains. I heard it can trigger the wildlife and spook an avalanche... or something."
Yeah we triggered something alright, ya melon! I just saved your sorry backside, you ungrafetul-
"Anyway, there's clearly nothing to see here. I reckon if we take the pass between those tome ridges over there, and then turn 30 degrees south, that ought to do it! C'mon now., let's get you strapped in..."
Not this again! Hey, not upside-down! You'll make me bring up my lunch!
Huh? Hang on... What the... Bric? I think this IS IT! THE THING! IT'S HERE! It's here, we've been stood on it all along! Put me down, ya BEEPing clodhopper! BRIC!
BRRRRIIIIIIIIIIC!!!!
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Other Chapters of the Linkingrad Saga:
A Weapon Against Co(s)mic Horrors (Soap)
The Doctor Will Remember You Now (Brikfic)
The Stars (Brikfic)
Embracing the Plague (Brikfic)
Arrival (Soap)
Against Deforestation (Soap)
