The BrikWars Forums

Location: Castle Szaraczaszka, somewhere inside Confederate territory
Time: 04.07.20,14


Presydent Małgorzata Sadow:
Dobry wieczór, dowódcy. As you may have known, the Konfederacja Polska will aid the NATO on the final effort to eradicate the Bawarski Reich out of existence and therefore, we will prepare ourselves for that battle by gathering some of the best ships and troops we can offer. However, Bawaria is not unprepared either, as they called for help and persuaded various nations and empires to fight along them. These include Venice, Luchardsko and *sigh* the Unia Krakowska, with the latter one joining the Magicians Alliance ...

Bracia Pułkowik Jerzy Durer:
As if we didn't have had it with the Bawarski heretyki, now the Unia has to pop up again and form an even bigger witch circle with them!

Bracia Grzegorz:
First accusing us of treachery, then forging bonds with our mortal enemy? They surely DO need some proper wpierdol.

Sadow:
It is improbable, that we might actually face these guys, so let's save the spanking for later on. Right now, let's focus on the Bawarcy first. May you pay attention to the holomap, please?


*WHOOOSH*




Sadow:
We will mostly operate in this sector. Our first goal of interest will be securing an important strategic position at Hel Ice Belt, to bring in further reinforcements. Admirał Dudek will lead his fleet to the Ice Belt and drive back any opposition.

Admirał Dudek:
My men have undergone months of special training and are well prepared for this operation.

Sadow:
Very well, Admirał. Our second goal will lead us to the world of Zugkraftsburg.




*WHOOOSH*










Sadow:
See that ship right there? According to reconnaissance reports, it is supposed to be a space elevator, evacuating the whole planet. And yes, they are serious about that one.

Bracia Grzegorz:
O kurwa!

Dudek:
Not even our orbital stations are meant to transport the population of an entire planet! How are the Bawarcy supposed to do that without complications?

Durer:
That's a question, we should leave to the Bawarcy themselves. The only thing we care about is to destroy the elevator and take the planet under control.

Sadow:
I guess that is all about it. We destroy that elevator and send in ground forces to fight of the remaining forces, afterwards. Remember, this is our chance, so let's better not fuck it up.


Sadow:
Bawaria will be purged!

Really well done, I await the moment that Poland can into space takes the field against bavaria.

I thought your nanoscale Bavarian space elevator was cute.

Good job finding a use for that big Squidward house head piece.

Awesome. Part of me wants to root for these Poles.

Colette wrote:Good job finding a use for that big Squidward house head piece.

That piece (and the teeth) have been taken from this set:


I've got a bunch of these 4+ sets flying around, but now I'm just asking myself, why I didn't got more sets with regular minifigures instead.

Will your troops fight an army of giants then?

Zupponn wrote:Will your troops fight an army of giants then?

Not necessarily, as I can form at least smaller squads of enemies to fight off. But still I have to concentrate on my army first.

Location: OKP Chrząszczyżewoszyce
Date: 20.08.2,014


Admirał Dudek: Power levels are stable?

Crew member 1: Tak, panie Admirale.

Dudek: Weapon systems ready?

Crew member 2: All weapons systems are fully operational, panie Admirale.

Dudek: Any hostile activities on the radar?

Crew member 3: Nein, Herr Admiral.


Crew member 3: Ermm... I mean …


Dudek: Guess, I've found one hostile activity right here! There is only one way to find out, if we might have a spy on board. So, listen carefully and repeat after me: Chrząszczyżewoszyce

Crew Member 3: Hhhh…ssshhh...oonn... I give up on tha-



*BLAM*


*BLAM BLAM*


Dudek: Knew it. Only a Native speaker of the Polish language could ever pass this little test.


Dudek : Krzysiek, for example, did that with ease, therefore proving his innocence …


Dudek: … or the fact, that a Krakowski spy has infiltrated our ranks!

Krzysiek: Co?!


Dudek: Guards, take him into custody and prepare him for interrogation!


Krzysiek: Proszę, NIIIEEEEEE!!!!!

Dudek: That'll teach him a lesson.


*PEEP PEEP*

Crew member 2: We're getting a transmission from the Presydent, panie Admirale.



*WHOOSH*

Presydent Małgorzata Sadow: Dzień dobry, Admirale. We have just received an urgent message from NATO High Command. They plan to take the Ice Belt with a strike team composed of mechs and Armoured Cores and ...

Dudek: So, we get finally a response from the NATO folks after weeks of waiting and procrastinating?


Sadow: Yes. It also means, that we have to undergo some plan changes: I'll suppose NATO plans to concentrate forces on the Bawarski homeplanet “Bawaria”. When the time is right, you will join them and wipe out any opposition.

Dudek: What about the Ice Belt, again?


Sadow: If you might take a look at the holo projector …


*WHOOSH*

Sadow: Grzegorz agreed on sending Abaddon to the Ice Belt, so we can join forces with Assyria and Scythia on that one. It also important to point out, that Kraków send one of their Void Hussars to aid Bawaria.

Dudek: So, we'll play alongside the big league?

Sadow: We shouldn't get a huge cock about that, for most of them still see us as a poop stain in the Nehellenium Galaxy. But we will prove them all wrong. Soon, we will rise again, we will return to old glory, we will into spa... ehm ... I mean, we will raze Bawaria to the ground z ogniem i mieczem.

Dudek: I'm certain we will. I'll instruct my crew about this and...

*BEEP BEEP* *BEEP BEEP*


Sadow: Hang on a second, I'm receiving a message from … Królewiec?


*WHOOSH*


„Greetings comrades,

I, Ivan Grigololovich, Governor of the Kaliningrad sector, speak for the whole population of this very sector and, therefore I proclaim the separation of Kaliningrad from the Confederation of Polonia. The peach majority always felt uncomfortable under Polish rule and I think it is the best of us all, if we embrace towards the 45th Union, where no peach will ever have to face discrimination, again!“


*silence*

Lolek: Panie Prezydencie? Everything alright?


Sadow: Kurwa jebana mać!


Sadow: I give them full civil rights, instead of selling them to Tratorja as test subjects, and they still feel oppressed?!


*SMASH*


Sadow: Still, something's wrong, with that message to me. They wouldn't have messed with me, before. Bolek, Lolek, wait here! I'll be right back!

Bolek: What are you going to do, panie Predydencie?


Sadow: Trying to negotiate with them...

Sadow's a pretty cool lady.