Flowery Idiot
Posted: Wed Apr 01, 2026 10:23 am
Eschato's secondary base, planet Ala-Kol, sector Jetisu
Piłsudski: YOU CAN STOP HIDING AGENT. I KNOW YOU ARE HERE.
Sikret Agent: Fine, fine, but don't we need more than Just the Two of Us (by Bill Withers and Grover Washington Jr.) to start the meeting?
Buce: I heard there is a meeting and arrived as fast as I decided to!
Piłsudski: YOU ARE ONLY 0.1914 SECONDS LATE.
Phalus: Aren't you even a bit puzzled by our appereances?
Piłsudski: I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT.
Buce: Yeah, stop being so paranoid Phalus, there is no way anyone would swap my beautiful body with a body of a space marine captain, without me noticing.
Sikret: We still need Zbigniew. I wonder if that blue explosion has anything to do with his delay.
Zbigniew: Worry not! It is I! And I have taken a prisoner!
Piłsudski: WHAT ABOUT THE CORE?
Zbigniew: I... Uhh...
Piłsudski: AGENT. I NEED YOU TO GO AND FIND THE CORE.
Sikret Agent: But how? We have no idea where it could be.
Piłsudski: YOU HAVE A LICENCE TO KILL, YOU WILL FIND A WAY TO FIND IT.
Sikret Agent: Only if I get my intro song.
Zbigniew: Don't you think that zombie is bossing around too much?
Buce: It's fine, because he also does all my paperwork.
Phalus: Are you blind? I have never worn anything green!
MEANWHILE
Captain Tyr: We must find the perpetrator behind this change.
Chaplain Aran: Do not lose faith, because your faith in the Emperor will guide you through this.
Assault Sergeant: Captain, I would never question you, but may I ask you to stop sitting on me?
Captain Tyr: Silence soldier! We may have been changed, but I am still in charge.
Librarian Alinoe: I sense something that way...
Scout Sergeant: Yeah, no shit, I've just been there and our bodies are exactly there. Congrats magican.
Chaplain Aran: Our bodies might have been transformed, but our souls can't be corrupted! Cease this way of speech or meet the wrath of the Emperor!
Scout Sergeant: Yes sir! Pardon me sir!
And so
Sikret Agent: Weird. I could've sworn I was taller.
Piłsudski: WHAT IS THIS MADNESS?
Buce: The way you ride that horse is an insult to horsemanship.
Phalus: Neigh.
Zbigniew: Who could have forseen this?
Scout Segeant: Enemy spotted.
Chaplain Aran: This is the moment of the test of our faith! For the Emperor! We shall know no fear!
Captain Tyr: Va te faire foutre!
Assault Sergeant: Neigh.
Librarian Alinoe: As I have forseen.
Epic fight scene
"Alpharius": Don't you think it's enough?
BoultonPaulDefiant: Aw, c'mon I want to show off my minis.
"Omegon": There's always #toys
BoultonPaulDefiant: Fiiine. I will return them their bodies, and clear it.
Captain Tyr: I will retuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurn!!!!!!11!!1!!!!1!
Piłsudski: AS I WAS SAYING...
Piłsudski: WHY ARE YOU STILL HERE
Gerasene Host Veteran: I am a certified lunatic.
Sikret Agent: Makes sense.
Piłsudski: YOU CAN STOP HIDING AGENT. I KNOW YOU ARE HERE.
Sikret Agent: Fine, fine, but don't we need more than Just the Two of Us (by Bill Withers and Grover Washington Jr.) to start the meeting?
Buce: I heard there is a meeting and arrived as fast as I decided to!
Piłsudski: YOU ARE ONLY 0.1914 SECONDS LATE.
Phalus: Aren't you even a bit puzzled by our appereances?
Piłsudski: I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT.
Buce: Yeah, stop being so paranoid Phalus, there is no way anyone would swap my beautiful body with a body of a space marine captain, without me noticing.
Sikret: We still need Zbigniew. I wonder if that blue explosion has anything to do with his delay.
Zbigniew: Worry not! It is I! And I have taken a prisoner!
Piłsudski: WHAT ABOUT THE CORE?
Zbigniew: I... Uhh...
Piłsudski: AGENT. I NEED YOU TO GO AND FIND THE CORE.
Sikret Agent: But how? We have no idea where it could be.
Piłsudski: YOU HAVE A LICENCE TO KILL, YOU WILL FIND A WAY TO FIND IT.
Sikret Agent: Only if I get my intro song.
Zbigniew: Don't you think that zombie is bossing around too much?
Buce: It's fine, because he also does all my paperwork.
Phalus: Are you blind? I have never worn anything green!
MEANWHILE
Captain Tyr: We must find the perpetrator behind this change.
Chaplain Aran: Do not lose faith, because your faith in the Emperor will guide you through this.
Assault Sergeant: Captain, I would never question you, but may I ask you to stop sitting on me?
Captain Tyr: Silence soldier! We may have been changed, but I am still in charge.
Librarian Alinoe: I sense something that way...
Scout Sergeant: Yeah, no shit, I've just been there and our bodies are exactly there. Congrats magican.
Chaplain Aran: Our bodies might have been transformed, but our souls can't be corrupted! Cease this way of speech or meet the wrath of the Emperor!
Scout Sergeant: Yes sir! Pardon me sir!
And so
Sikret Agent: Weird. I could've sworn I was taller.
Piłsudski: WHAT IS THIS MADNESS?
Buce: The way you ride that horse is an insult to horsemanship.
Phalus: Neigh.
Zbigniew: Who could have forseen this?
Scout Segeant: Enemy spotted.
Chaplain Aran: This is the moment of the test of our faith! For the Emperor! We shall know no fear!
Captain Tyr: Va te faire foutre!
Assault Sergeant: Neigh.
Librarian Alinoe: As I have forseen.
Epic fight scene
"Alpharius": Don't you think it's enough?
BoultonPaulDefiant: Aw, c'mon I want to show off my minis.
"Omegon": There's always #toys
BoultonPaulDefiant: Fiiine. I will return them their bodies, and clear it.
Captain Tyr: I will retuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurn!!!!!!11!!1!!!!1!
Piłsudski: AS I WAS SAYING...
Piłsudski: WHY ARE YOU STILL HERE
Gerasene Host Veteran: I am a certified lunatic.
Sikret Agent: Makes sense.