Deus Ex Machina, For the sake of time

The Magic SOB forum is for posts of story sequences that are frequently vignette-based. Put those here while actual battle reports can go in Reports From the Field.
You must talk like James T. Kirk in this forum at all times. Leonard Nimoy is fine too.

Moderators: Zahru II, Magic Soap, Thesson

Post Reply
User avatar
Kastrenzo
all I have is anthrax and rage
all I have is anthrax and rage
Posts: 993
Joined: Fri Dec 16, 2011 10:49 am
Location: Uganda

Deus Ex Machina, For the sake of time

Post by Kastrenzo » Fri May 15, 2020 8:44 pm

Spoiler
Show
This is gonna get a little stupid, don't expect me to take this seriously, it was either I do this, and push my story forward a few months, or I end it all and start from scratch, frankly I didnt want to do this side story about Shulga and the Crystal anymore, I just want to move on
Monolith Nexus
After the battle of the Nexus
Whoa... What was that? Uh... It seems that the Humans, the Gods of Time, or Brikthulu himself had been pissed off about the dragging on of this story... Whoever it was. Haphazardly pulled these minifigs forward in time a few months so that they could stop wasting time on boring exposition, and get back to entertaining you!

The Monolith is defeated. A temporary alliance of Imperiya and Stroiteliga forces assaulted the Nexus! Basil Bob with the power of the Dramacron, sacrificed himself to destroy the Evil Crystal. The Crystal turned out to be nothing but a Macguffin and a means for Humans to torture these Minifigs with convoluted plotlines!

With his plot armor vanquished, Shulga is finally dead. Killed by Kast with his own edgelord sword!

During the destruction of the Crystal, parts of it became fused with the recentley rediscovered Imperial Throne, It's Magikal powers have been embued into the Throne, giving whoever controls it, the ability to influence the realm as a whole. Like a God.

Kast Immediately takes the Throne, but with no interest in actually using the power, he calls a meeting between the leaders of the major players of the Realm, to educate them on the path foward before he surrenders the Throne to them.
Image20200515_192830 by Kastrenzo, on Flickr
Kast sits upon the Throne, now called the Nexus Throne for it has been fused into the Realm Nexus.. Accompanied by leaders and representatives of the Imperiya, Stroiteliga, Black Legion and the Molochites
Kast: Right... I'm going to make this very simple because I have no interest in sitting on this chair for any longer than I have to, the events of the past few months have just made my head hurt and I want to go nap for a couple FOREVERS...

With our enemy defeated, It's time to decide what's next for the realm. I Appreciate that some of you may object to Charon being here.. but the fact is that they never served our Enemy, The Monolith just teleported them into the Nexus because it knew they wanted to fight the rest of you.. As far as Im concerned, that chapter is over.

You all can go back to killing each other as soon as this is over.
Image20200515_192847 by Kastrenzo, on Flickr
Kast: But we have to talk about this fancy chair. As we recentley discovered, it has some of the world altering abilities displayed by the crystal... you could almost say Godlike... I have no interest in this, but I also don't want to see this world ruined.

So I have created this... The Black Book of Laws.. In it, the ruler of the throne will add new laws that each subsequent ruler that follows him or her, is bound to follow. The first and most important, is that regardless of background, origin or ambition, whoever takes the throne has the utmost responsibility to ensure that our world continues to exist, for better or worse...

I'm also making it so that whoever takes the throne must be worthy... meaning you've got to protect your own neck, whether by fighting whoever challenges you, being smart and manipulative.. or just by being a good leader and giving people more reasons to keep you alive than taking your head... Killing an emperor is not a crime as far as the realm is considered!

and lastly, with the exception of the first laws that I'm implimenting, any further law can be repealed.. at the cost of abdication. So if you want to undo something someone else put in, you must give up the title.

Anything after these three, go wild... I don't have time for this shit anymore..
Image20200515_192952 by Kastrenzo, on Flickr
Kast: Now, that's it for my time on this ugly ass chair. but as a parting gift. each party here will be given something going forward. Now this first one may Upset some of you, but you can just kill each other if you don't like it.... Since the Throne was originally the property of the Imperiya, I'm handing it over to them for first control... Remember, whoever takes the Throne is responsible for the whole Realm, the lands of their enemies included!..

Sergachev: *Smirks*
Image20200515_193033 by Kastrenzo, on Flickr
Kast: To Vaclav and the Stroiteliga, I am giving the OT Crown... This prized helmet is a symbol of great leadership and awesomeness.. No matter how successful your enemies may be, they will always feel incomplete without this Helm.
And you will command almost as much respect as any Emperor or Demi-God with this.
Image20200515_193051 by Kastrenzo, on Flickr
Kast: To Charon, and the Black Legion, I am giving a fragment of the old world, the Life Stone. A powerful artifakt that can heal mortal wounds... To literally cheat death
Image20200515_193128 by Kastrenzo, on Flickr
Kast: And lastly, to Phoenix Rix, and the Order... I give the Golden Blade.. a sacred weapon of war that can cut through any foe..
Image20200515_193310 by Kastrenzo, on Flickr
He stands up, locks up the Black Book and throws it back on the chair
Kast: And with that. I'm done here... You've all been given extremely powerful artifakts... and you all no doubt still want to kill each other for the artifakts that your enemies posess.. everyone feels rewarded, and yet everyone feels screwed! .... I'm outta here. have fun!
Image20200515_195408 by Kastrenzo, on Flickr
As Kast Leaves, he also forces everyone except the Imperiya members to teleport back to their homes to avoid a bloodbath in the Nexus

Later...

Image20200515_200655 by Kastrenzo, on Flickr

Sergachev has gathered the top Commanders and Generals of the Imperiya for an important decision
Sergachev: So with that.. I want you to know that I will -not- be assuming this responsibility, for my priorities still lie with what we've built, not with being custodian for our world. And know that I will still gladly uphold my Allegiance to the throne based on our traditions. So long as our Emperor is Just!

So now it comes to us that we must decide who will take the mantle as the protector of our realm. Doing so is as was mandated, a responsibility to protect the Realm's existence, not it's inhabitants... That's where we come in.

Who among us is willing to take that mantle?
Image20200515_200717 by Kastrenzo, on Flickr
He walks down the isle, pausing in front of one of the Generals whom he sees wearing the looted cloak of Shulga
Sergachev: I just want you to know, I find that to be in incredibly bad taste...
Image20200515_200831 by Kastrenzo, on Flickr
Sergachev: Who will it be? I hope I don't have to pass this responsibility onto the next group... You're supposed to be our best and brightest!
Image20200515_200904 by Kastrenzo, on Flickr
He sits on the steps of the Throne and an awkward silence echoes throughout the room as he waits impatientely.

Image20200515_200927 by Kastrenzo, on Flickr

A General clad in some odd armor steps forward

Image20200515_201046 by Kastrenzo, on Flickr
He takes off his helmet and removes his mask.
MBB: I accept this task!
Image20200515_201138 by Kastrenzo, on Flickr
Some of the Generals look at each other, their expressions hidden as they're almost all wearing masks and helmets, but the mood is obvious. Some are confused as to who this guy is.

Image20200515_201346 by Kastrenzo, on Flickr
He clambers on top of the throne and takes the Black Book, Immediately barking into it and yelling throughout the hall
MBB: I AM MAJOR BOOTY BOTHERED, THE LAST SURVIVOR OF GALACIA AND LOYAL SERVANT TO EMPEROR SHULGA LONG MAY HE BE REMEMBERED. AS EMPEROR I SAY THAT LORD BOOTY BOTHERED SHALL REIGN AS EMPEROR FOREVE...
Image20200515_201831 by Kastrenzo, on Flickr
One of the Commanders immediately shoots him in the face

Image20200515_201954 by Kastrenzo, on Flickr
Lana: Okay, fuck that guy... I think we need to think this through a little more. and lay some ground rules of our own... first rule, no megalomaniac ass heads?
Image20200515_202003 by Kastrenzo, on Flickr
Sergachev groans in disgust
Sergachev: Ugh.... we're gonna be here a while...
Faction Index - Battleplates Chronology - Flickr Gallery


You can't ride a scooter when you're drunk and 9 years old.

User avatar
Kastrenzo
all I have is anthrax and rage
all I have is anthrax and rage
Posts: 993
Joined: Fri Dec 16, 2011 10:49 am
Location: Uganda

Re: Deus Ex Machina, For the sake of time

Post by Kastrenzo » Fri May 15, 2020 8:49 pm

Also, incase it wasn't clear, the guy who got shot in the face, MBB - Major Booty Bothered, is a nod to a character that appeared in Ninja Baits buttnomikon last year.

Best known for sending wiggle iggle screeching into the brik-basement, refusing to listen to his [WHITEAGLE PROBLEMS]
Image
Faction Index - Battleplates Chronology - Flickr Gallery


You can't ride a scooter when you're drunk and 9 years old.

User avatar
Infinity
Officer
Posts: 103
Joined: Thu Mar 26, 2020 2:27 pm
Location: Chillin out somehwere

Re: Deus Ex Machina, For the sake of time

Post by Infinity » Fri May 15, 2020 11:40 pm

Great soap. :omnom:
The most dangerous enemy you can fight is a man with nothing left to lose

:studgod:

Post Reply