An Immortal's Worst Nightmare Turn 4

[PandoraNuker]

I felt this should be reposted, I don't ignore or edit your orders nor do I have a fixed outcome, I don't do initiative and long story short, if you do not understand why your orders were not followed, please pm me within 2 days of the turn's post date and you shall receive an explanation of why parts of your orders could not have been followed.

Anyway, I have like 63 photos, so I'll post them in chunks. Ok?

Peaches


The other jedi hero climbs aboard the flying demonic shark and together they use their heroic feats to charge up the shark's energy. It fires a laser at the Nyphilian tank.


The very same thick armor that was supposed to protect the crew inside prevented them from bailing, and forced them to face a grisly death. Fortunately, it was a quick one.


The tank turret man, after watching his friends die, aims the 6-inch turret at the shark and yells with his dying breath: "For the Nyphilian Empire" and response fires the turret, smiling as he died knowing he would not be forgotten.


The shark took a hit! It begins to lose altitude as the jedi heroes know what will become of them...


Squish! The shark dies and the two jedi heroes are now ready to serve at the local ihop!


Meanwhile the cowvalry wagon heads to the fort...


...Only to be massacred by response fire. Haha, I finally did response fire!


The peach reinforcements move up.

POOP monsters (both the POOP monsters and Mini-Warhead are on his team, I treat them as seperate factions though)


A POOP golem flings the miner hero at the Nyphilians.


He flies into the air!


A nyphilian attempts a response fire but it's too late.


The hero crashes into the defense turret, mangling and destroying it.


It falls apart...


The unexploded munitions explode and kill a soldier.


Meanwhile Infernus knocks down a blokbot laser tower.


As the tower crashes down, 7 blokbots die.


While you can't see them that well, the little POOP monsters are happily munching on the blokbots, adding 5 more to the KIA list.

Nyphilians


Seeing how they response fired, the troopers decide against eating their rifles, which would be impossible and kill them anyway. However, the commander attempts to eat his own head (heroic feat) and fails. He then rips out his single-serve bottle of maniac beer...


That should do it, now the commander mutated and has maniac stats. (Warhead, coupld you pm me their stats)


The lieutenant walks over to the commander.


Errrrrrrr, bad move. I'll have to censor the rest for the decency of the viewers (Think of the children!).


The crane flings a peach cyborg at the peaches.


It kills a peach. Lol, we really should make a Warhead with a green flame.


The remaining peach cyborg decides to hunt some peaches.


Meanwhile the peach torturer attempts to start a program to necro dead Nyphilians.

N00b Miners


The last of the miners decide to do a last stand and face off against the peaches


The miner in the mech grabs his last stick of dynamite, and throws it at the peaches.


2 peaches explode and die.

Tyronians


The Tyronian champion shoots at the red POOP golem.


Miraculously, It hits and blows off an arm. Thankfully for the monster, it wasn't its throwing arm.


The champion then jumps.


He then stabs Infernus through the back of the head...


Carves his face...


And lands on a pile of bloks.


Suddenly Infernus's jaw drops...


And falls off. He lost a hit point.

Mini-Warhead


Mini-Warhead concentrates all of his energies into mind controlling the remaining blokbot laser tower.


Success!


The laser comes crashing down towards the fort the fort.


Bonks! Well, the picture is self-explanatory...




Anyway, 5d10 explosions aside, 4 Nyphilians died including the lieutenant, the fort is wrecked, and <a href='http://tinyurl.com/y42zurt'>alot</a> of debris was pushed around. The red arrow indicates the resting place of the antimortalium container.


Meanwhile, 32 blokbots come onto the mainland. Stupid aoffan, if he just pm'd me, his orders wouldn't have been swept up by the broom of doom and nullified.

The Assyrians (They were NPC this turn)


The Assyrians aim at the blokbots.


Suddenly, Natal- errr, their hero uses the Maytricks and attempts to communicate with the robotic mind of the blokbot commander.


Hero: What do you want?
Blokbot Champion: You dead
Blokbot Champion: Now stay out of my mind!


The Assyrian hero is now disrupted.


The Assyrians open fire.


One dude however critically fails and his gun blows up.


The other three manage to kill 4 blokbots.

Overview:

Score Table:
Nyphilians:
Kills: 15 (8 blokbots)
Casualties: 17 (14 soldiers+2 peach cyborgs)

Peaches:
Kills: 9
Casualties: 12

Assyrians:
Kills: 13 (1 blokbot mage+4 blokbots)
Casualties: 2

Tyronians:
Kills: 6
Casualties: 6 (2 heroes)

N00b Miners:
Kills: 9 (4 blokbots)
Casualties: 9 (1 hero)

Civilians: Terminated
Kills: 4 (hero)
Casualties: 6

Channel 4 Paparazzi News Team:Terminated
Kills: 0
Uncovered scandals: 1
Casualties: 4

Blokbots:
Kills: 8 (1 accidental)
Casualties: 29

POOP Monsters+Mini-Warhead
Kills: 13 (12 blokbots)
Casualties: 0

Now taking orders for turn 5!

[Arkbrik]

Did you just censor tentacle pr0n?

[RJ]

I think he did...

[PandoraNuker]

Speaking of tentacles...


Brikthulu!!!

RJ now controls Brikthulu and the blokbots turn 5 on.

Funny. RJ's avatar is the same as my first sigfig's head.

[RJ]

You said it wasn't Cthulu! You can't put Brikthulu there instead!

[PandoraNuker]

Cthlulu is an ugly octopus monster.
Brikthulu is a brikwars parody of cthulu
I said that so you wouldn't expect some giant antlantis squid monstrosity and I even showed you a picture of brikthulu to clear things up. Besides, brikthulu is awesomer.

[RJ]

Yeah, but only because Brikthulu doesn't have the works of a madman to compete with in his own pantheon.

Also, are you saying that that thing is better than this?


Ignoring the blurry picture...

[PandoraNuker]

By no means, I am just saying I *think* that brikthulu is more powerful.

However, that thing is a crazily badass and awesome monster.

[RJ]

Good, that you realise it is not merely Cthulu...

[Paco]

Is my flung hero still alive?

[Warhead]

Since you are ten you are therefore far to young to be mangled from now on. I throw you back in the water until you are old enough to taunt.

I see you still have no idea what a response fire action is but since you allowed the troops to fire for once then I'm not going to grumble. Read the rules though, then you can decide if it's something you want to use or not.

The Maniac rules were posted along with my orders for this turn. But add that he has a grab attack in close combat as a Special Rule: One opponent in close combat is grabbed by the tentacles and held fast, unable to move on a 4+ on a D6 and can be crushed on a successful roll of 3+ on a D6 doing 2D6+3 damage next turn. This attack is extra to the Maniacs normal attack. That seems appropriate.

[PandoraNuker]

Bleh, I shouldn't oblige you to do the hard math of the score table. Connect the facts Paco please:
Your hero was rudely grabbed a POOP golem.
He was flung at high speeds.
He experienced shock halfway through flight.
He was shot by a Nyphilian.
He collided with the metal turret and pointy missile cones at said high speeds.

This should be in "your most painful brikwars death" thread.

[Warhead]

Turn 5 Orders

For disobeying orders and not eating their weapons the Maniac will now turn on his own men and try to eat them. For each man crushed (and therefore consumed) the Maniac can keep adding to his HP (wound) total without limit. Only one mini-fig per turn can be consumed.

The men are none to happy about this but can't bring themselves to kill their leader, training discipline is too strong. Have them try to avoid the Maniac and shoot at the closest enemies.

The crane can continue to chuck Peach Cyborgs at the enemy.

The Peach Cyborgs left should go hunting Peaches. The Maniac wont eat Peaches, they are too sub standard to digest.

[MasterEcabob]

Your hero was rudely grabbed a POOP golem.
He was flung at high speeds.
He experienced shock halfway through flight.
He was shot by a Nyphilian.
He collided with the metal turret and pointy missile cones at said high speeds.

Hahahaha! Puny human make funny explosion on missile gun!

And, ala Warhead, I think I'm going to post my orders here as well:

Turn 5 Orders

The POOPs will continue eating blokbots, along with the occasional miner or Assyrian (don't eat Peach; gross!). Heroic feat should involve chucking the nearest large object at Brikthulu.

Meanwhile, MiniWarhead spots the Immortal look alike and challenges him to an epic shoot out on the bridge. If he refuses, charge the castle (I don't care how far away he is; just get him there) and rip open the front door.

[Paco]

Turn 5 Orders.
The last miner uses the mech to step on some Peaches, and uses the claw arm to bisect some others.