ORK!

Post by **Scottsman** » Sat Nov 12, 2011 7:11 pm

break down barn door, swinging my sword by the rope screaming "ANYONE WANTS LIVE YOU COME WITH ME!"

Post by **lawmaster** » Sat Nov 12, 2011 9:01 pm

Set arrow on fire and use it to gather them in big group then tie em up

Post by **SnakeMittens** » Sat Nov 12, 2011 10:23 pm

WHAARGH! Me attack bobbits and take some for food, mebbe.

Post by **Keldoclock** » Sat Nov 12, 2011 10:26 pm

Smash down barn door.

Roar in bestial fury.

Post by **Silverdream** » Sat Nov 12, 2011 11:33 pm

Keldoclock wrote:

Kill all da pigmen

Post by **Keldoclock** » Sun Nov 13, 2011 12:50 am

WE'RE the pigmen. Old school orks had pig faces, look in the OD&D manual and the cover of the game we are playing.

Post by **Ham** » Sun Nov 13, 2011 1:07 am

fecking greenskin Minoboars.

Post by **Killer Karetsu** » Sun Nov 13, 2011 5:35 am

Someone shoot fire arrows on da barn roof, bobbits go out, we wait outside, we kill bobbits!

Post by **knolli** » Sun Nov 13, 2011 5:54 am

lawmaster wrote:Set arrow on fire and use it to gather them in big group then tie em up

HÄ?!? I don't see how a burning arrow will help you take prisoners. You also need two free hands and a rope to tie someone up. You have neither while you use the bow.

+++++

Spork turns around. This one is of no use any more. He strides to the big barn. The others follow but Dork. Maybe there are more Bobbits in this house. He searches through kitchen, dining hall, common room and others until he finds a bedroom. "Aunty? Was it Joe again? Lemme sleep." The small creature in the bed turns away from the door. Dork moves closer and grabs the youngling by the throat. "Me not Aunty. Stay quiet. Me kill you if not. Understand?" The bobbit's eyes are wide with fear. He nods. Dork grabs the bed sheets and wraps them around his prey so it looks like a bag and only the head sticks out. Dork also gags him with a teddy bear. He is nearly done when he hears the noise of battle outside.

The others have reached the big barn. Big and Spork run right through the barn door with ease (24 and 10 vs. 9) and continue their charge inside. Some inhabitans are hit and buried by the parts of the door. There are nearly two dozen Bobbitses here. Some are sitting around drinking beer or smoking, others are dancing around a black thing in the center of the barn. In a corner a group of three was playing music. There are hay bales everywhere. Some pitchforks, scythes and similar tools are in one corner.

Big roars in bestial fury. Spork swings his sword by the rope like Snork behind him swirls his sling. He screams: "ANYONE WANTS LIVE YOU COME WITH ME!" At that moment the knot holding his sword comes loose. It flies through the air and pushes the hat off one bobbit's head before it hits his neighbor and nearly decapitates him. A fountain of blood rises. There is a moment of dead silence. Then panik breaks out. Most of the peasants run for the backdoor or the windows. Only a few have the will to fight. Someone throws a beer mug at Dog, but it hits the door post next to him (4 vs. 9).

Post by **Killer Karetsu** » Sun Nov 13, 2011 6:11 am

RAARGH! NO BOBBIT THROW BEER MUGS AT DOG!!!
Dog charges the bobbit with his spear!! Kebab incoming!

Post by **lawmaster** » Sun Nov 13, 2011 6:41 am

You know what fire fire arrow onto house and listen to them screams

Post by **SnakeMittens** » Sun Nov 13, 2011 11:11 am

RAWRGH! CHARGE!

Post by **Silverdream** » Sun Nov 13, 2011 1:21 pm

Bring bobbit to barn. No fight but watch udder orks backs.

Post by **Keldoclock** » Sun Nov 13, 2011 2:10 pm

Big tries to stop the tasty bobbits from escaping the barn. And by stop, I mean beat the crap out of anyone that moves.

Post by **knolli** » Sun Nov 13, 2011 6:29 pm

I'm sure I siad that before: Cool and stylish actions will be rewarded with Orc Points that you can either use to get a temporary bonus or to improve your stats permanently. As much fun as shouting "CHARGE!" may be, I would very much like you to give me a little more input. Otherwise the game will degenarate to this:
Big attack: 19. Farmer no. 1 parry: 4. Bobbi dead.
Dog attack: 14. Farmer no. 2 parry. 7. Bobbit no. 2 severely wounded and retreats from combat.
Snork charge: 9. Milita no. 1 parry: 14. Milita no. 1 counter: 11. Snork parry 13. No damage dealt this turn.
Pork grabs oil lamp and sets hay on fire.
Dork observes: Lights are lit in some other houses. Someone hastenes across the townsquare towards a big bell on a post.

Milita no. 2 and 3 are stuck in a stream of paniking Bobbits. Farmer no. 3, 4, 5 and 6 get hold of pitchforks and scythes. In tha far corner two hooded figures bigger that the average Bobbit rise to their feet.
Peasant no. 1 to 3 are fighting to get free from the rubble that was the door. Peasant no 4 to 15 flee in panik. No. 4,7 and 15 are trampled down.