Manly Santa and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

[AokDSM]

(Battle Report) Manly Santa Stranded in Santa Fricksicko

On Manly Santa Day Eve, due to unfortunate shenanigans outside the scope of our story, Manly Santa was forced to abandon his sleigh and reindeer for a random A**-Wing he stole from a Store Wore planet. Since he left the piloting to his incompetent sidekick (and sometimes lover) Ebo the Elf, he quickly found himself stranded in the parking lot of an abandoned port warehouse outside the city of Santa Fricksicko. His craft's crash trajectory left vapor in the starry sky, and two squads of self-interested individuals soon konverged on his location...

Overwatch:


Troop Overview [Santa, played by mutual agreement]

Spoiler

Show

Luckily, Manly Santa is prepared to defend himself with the aid of the Icicler, a fearsome 3d6 DMG machinegun.
Santa is a hero equipped with the Icicler, and a bag of infinite dynamite. Cliche: Barbarian + Santa


Also, Ebo is here. He ain't looking too good from that crash.

Troop Overview [Association of National Holidays, played by AokDSM's brother]

Spoiler

Show

Opposing Santa is the Association of National Holidays. Their goal is to claim Manly Santa's power for themselves to create a false Santa and complete their set of holiday themed rogues!

The Flesh Prince of Bel-Air
This guy is a hero. He has no national holiday affiliation but represents always having a good time. Cliche: Barbarian.


Poptart
Poptart represents halloween and is ready to "pop" the heads off his enemies.


Birdman
Birdman is a hired gun, whose guns shoot birds out of them. He has no holiday affiliation because the author ran out of holidays.
Birdman has two supernatural d10s tied to the two gun talismans. Cliche: Seagull Themed Superhero


Mrs. St. Pati
Mrs. St. Pati represents st. patrick day, and is an elf who is such a trickster that even she turned her photo blurry.


Dia de los Muertos
Dia de los Muertos represents the day that you die. It's basically a holiday for your relatives.


Chief EverBountiful
Chief EverBountiful represents the thanksgiving spirit. So enamoured with this holiday, he turned his legs into food. However, do not attempt to take a bite as you may receive a nasty kick to the head.
Chief EverBountiful is an Size 2" MOC who is pretty much just a minifig with two kick melee legs and a 2d6 longbow.


Happy Birthday
His first name is Happy, his last is Birthday. In his birthday suit, he's rocking it out with his sweet electric guitar that he got from his girlfriend. Everyday is his birthday. He's one happy dude.


Lady Liberty
Lady Liberty represents AMERICA and everything she stands for during the 4th of July!


The Ginger Dead Man
The Ginger Dead Man is an elite sniper who has been trained to take out Manly Santa. Along the North Pole Manly Santa's enemies grow by the number as Manly Santa's palace is the only source of income for the entire North Pole. Whoever is not with Manly Santa is cast out from and sort if wealth and prosperity, forced to live in the slums of the Arctic. Ginger Dead Man is one such unlucky individual whose family made one minor mistake and was thrown out into the wilderness by Manly Santa. He has vowed to take revenge on Manly Santa for what he did to his family.
The Ginger Dead Man is a Sniper.


Incan Man
The Incan Man looks cool and represents December 23, 2012 when a bunch of people believed the world was going to end.

Troop Overview [Ice X, played by AokDSM]

Spoiler

Show

Opposing this motley crew is a crack squad of Space Russians and mercenaries, led by none other than the disgraced former member of the Association of National Holidays: Lt. Jack Frost!! He aims to gain Santa's power for himself to become the one true personification of winter. He hasn't read Narnia and doesn't know what you mean when you say 'intellectual property theft'.

Lt. Jack Frost is a hero equipped with a two-handed weapon whose power has turned him into living ICE! Cliche: Ice Themed Villain
Behind Jack are twin yetis who he regards as his sons: Yak and Tak. These yetis are trained killers

Accompanying Jack are also two mercenaries who operate a back mounted AT rifle.
The larger alien is a Heavy. The smaller robot is a Scout.


Finally, the 'Buzzkill' squad of intimidating Space Russian ladies is led by Jack's off and on again lover: Miss Snowflake
Miss Snowflake is a Skirmisher.

Objectives
1. Association of National Holidays: Eliminate Manly Santa and steal his powerful hat
2. Ice X: Eliminate Manly Santa and steal his powerful hat.
3. Manly Santa: Survive.

[AokDSM]

Turn 1
Association of National Holidays

The Association is on the move, dashing to flank Santa on the left. The Flesh Prince of Bel Air runs to secure the truck.


Chief EverBountiful lodges an arrow, and fires a wild potshot at Santa who is a few inches out of range. He goes Over the Top! and manages to reduce his out of range penalty by applying the die.


Manly Santa rolls badly on his armor and has to redshirt the barely conscious Ebo the Elf (and sometimes lover) from the wreckage.


Birdman uses both supernatural dice to summon two seagulls! One of them fumbles, however, and the seagull treacherously drags Birdman 15" over towards Manly Santa! The other bird gets dangerously close... but ends up juuuuuusttttt out of range.

Manly Santa

Santa uses a Heroic Feat to gift him... some dynamite! Coal must be too expensive this year... He also fails to fire his giant Icicler. Damn... Use 4 never seemed so large.


Merry Manly Santa Day Mother Clucker...

Ice X

Most of Lt. Frost's team heads to back him up. The Heavy alien tries to setup for a good shot on Manly Santa.


Acknowledging that the first rule of horror movies is 'never split up,' and deciding to ignore it anyway, the Buzzkill squad sends Miss Snowflake and and a fleet-footed assistant to secure the other truck.