The Dimmy's Guide to the Galaxy

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Revision as of 18:09, 2 May 2019 by Negacolette (talk | contribs) (History)
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Don't Panic

Welcome, new Brikwarrior, to the fabulous and convoluted world of Brikwars!

This page will help you dive into the game and the community kanon that has been built out of two decades of Brikwars.


How to play

Building an Army

  • ranged and melee soldiers
  • Heroes
  • Basic constructions

Creating a Scenario

  • Balance
  • Special effects
  • Photography and storytelling

Explaining it to Your Mom

  • rules summary
  • how to let the other player think they are doing well

Getting Ambitious

  • faction theming
  • specialists
  • Supernatural Dice
  • awesome constructions
  • forum battles

Key Concepts

Philosophy

Misspelling

Perhaps the first thing you noticed about Brikwars is the missing "c" from the word "brick." One of the most common tropes in Brikwars is to purposely misspell words to highlight their badassery. Replace a syllable of a word with "Brik," as in "Brikpokalypse." Use letter substitutions such as "K" for boring old "C," as in "Magik" or "Artifax." Punny names and outright misspellings fall under this concept. A similar concept is that "all lists start with 6."

Kopyright

Many things in Brikwars, including the brands of konstruction toys that the game is played with, fall under kopyright. Kopyright is a set of laws to encourage creators to get extra sneaky when stealing ideas from other creators. Brikwarriors draw from a Brikwars Canon that includes European History, Star Wars, Warhammer, Evangelion, Gundam, and classic LEGO themes. However, due to Kopyright, the concepts borrowed from these foundational texts are usually renamed and/or remixed to avoid litigation. For example, there is no such thing as a lightsaber(c) - but there is a laser sword.

Rekonstruktion

Human years are referred to as Brik Rekonstruktions. For example, the year 1985 is known as B.R. 1,985. The time elapsed in a B.R. is not correlated to the time in a human year, nor do all minifigures experience the same amount of time during a single B.R. Events may not even happen in chronological order in a B.R! This makes it a fairly useless tool for talking about history in the Brikwars Kanon. Sorry.

Ossum

The most important element of a Brikwar is Ossum (a misspelling of "awesome"). When choosing between following the game rules and doing the most ossum thing, do the most ossum thing. Much of what follows is just the most ossum stories and battles people have written.

Fudge

The second most important element of a Brikwar is Fudge. Fudge is what allows you to choose the ossum things and not get too wrapped up in the details of a game. When stuck on how to do something in game, just make up something that allows you to do the most ossum thing. Fudge is also liberally applied in retelling the Brikwars Kanon. See also Retkon.

Weapons and Creations

Orange Transparent Chainsaw

The most powerful minifig weapon in Brikwars is the Orange Transparent Chainsaw. It can cut through all materials, cannot be parried, and is usually wielded by the most epik characters. Transitively, Orange Transparent is the most powerful material in Brikwars. Other transparent materials exist and have interesting powers, and are even preferred by other factions, but they are always inferior to Orange Transparent.

Nova Sword

The second most powerful minifig weapon in Brikwars is the Nova Sword. This is typically a lightsaber hilt with a stack of transparent studs on it. In universe, it is an energy sword powered by a small pulsar in the handle. It is good for bashing heads in.

SHIP

The third most powerful minifig weapon is the SHIP. A SHIP is a space warship that is at least 100 studs long. This makes it a mobile, practically indestructible, fortress bristling with guns and filled with troops.

Super Heavy Death Tank

The SHDT is the land equivalent of a SHIP. It is not necessarily 100 studs long, but it is massive and ossum.

Mecha

SHIPs and SHDTs are the weapons people use when they want to win. Mecha is what you use when you're ossum. Why else would you bring a building sized melee weapon to a gun fight?

Battlefield

The ultimate weapon is the battlefield. Battlefields are traps created by Humans to lure dozens of minifigures to their deaths. Battlefields have killed more minifigures than even OTCs.

Legendary Characters

Brikthulhu

Brikthulhu is an ancient one presiding over the Brikverse. His goal is to destroy minifigurekind by imposing total sanity upon them. All apokalyptic events are related to Brikthulhu.

Pacifass

Pacifass is the antithesis of all things Brikwars. He likes Peace, Love, and Vegetables.

Dimmies

Dimmies are lovable child-like minifigures that are useless at things. Regular minifigures despise dimmies.

Dungans

Dungans and Shitgoats are icky poop worshippers. Regular minifigures kill these from a distance.

History

Prehistory

In the beginning there was nothing. Then, the Great Builder created Baseplates, and minifigs to populate the baseplates. The Great Builder separated the minifigs by theme and set them to war amongst themselves. The greatest themes were Space and Castle, and their wars were glorious. Eventually, one champion emerged that was superior to all other minifigs, the Deadly SpaceMan.

Deadly SpaceMen and the Tron Lineage

The Deadly SpaceMan

When the Deadly SpaceMan had slain all inferior beings, the Great Builder blessed him with a multitudinous empire in his own image. The DSM himself wore a blue spacesuit, and those like him formed the bulk of his conquering forces. His red forces formed the backbone of his infantry, and the white forces served as special forces. The yellow forces asserted dominance over conquered peoples by constructing moonbases wherever they went, and the cunning black forces commanded with an iron fist.

The Deadly SpaceMan Empire established the dominance of Space within the Brikverse, pushing Castle and other themes to the outskirts of civilization. The DSM Empire also purged the Brikverse of CLOan bricks, defeating the Nega-Bloktrix and banishing her forces to the Negaverse.

The Empire flourished under the Pax Galaxia as the descendants of the Deadly SpaceMen multiplied and evolved to fit the unique worlds they had discovered. The original Deadly SpaceMan disappeared into legend, and a power vacuum developed. Lord Future the Unifier stepped up to hold the empire together, modernizing military technology and improving the galactic economy. However, a rebellion broke out, led by the DarkTron Faction. Lord Future attempted to squash the rebellion with his SpaceCops, but DarkTron simply returned as DarkTron II. Lord Future quickly lost control of large swaths of his empire. An independent colony of SpaceMen on Iceworld discovered Orange Transparent, a material that could be forged into unstoppable weapons. A faction calling themselves the Manly Men, led by the Manly Fuckin' Santa, claimed to harness the power of "magnets" to train unbreakable shock troops. As more and more factions asserted independence, the Deadly SpaceMan Empire collapsed into civil war.

Rainbow War

The survivors of the DSM Civil War divided into mighty StarShip Civilizations. Multiple factions banded together to form each Civiliation, united by common color schemes and doctrines. Each built a massive StarShip to house its people and set out to seek a new home. It is believed there were 48 of these StarShips, but only eight are recorded in history. They are:

These eight factions colonized the region of space surrounding the Nehellenium Galaxy and fought many epic wars there. Many Brik Rekonstruktions passed, the original StarShips were scrapped for parts, and the factions continued to divide and evolve. The people forgot their first purpose, and settled down on planets to form "societies" and "order." This displeased the Great Builder, but the Kanon had already begun to disrupt the natural cycle of Brik Rekonstruktion. For a time, the people fought only petty, local wars, and this was boring.

Modern Era

Triangulist-FoBoB War

Triangulism was the first religion to really spread throughout the galaxy. A prophet, known only as The Wizard introduced belief in the Great Triangle, which amounted to little more than an over-analysis of the universe to point everything to triangles. This religion was an abomination to the Great Builder Two-by-Two, who is of course, a square. Triangulists became known for the gibbering madness induced by their conspiracy theories. Opposing Triangulism were The Followers of BoB, a hidden cult that revealed itself to defeat the Triangulists. BoB was an omnipotent god of slaughter, power, and ketchup who attracted powerful factions to his cause. The Triangulists and the Followers of BoB found themselves diametrically opposed and religious war ravaged the galaxy. A third faction that worshipped Raptor Jesus later entered the war. Little archaeological evidence remains from this war, but it is known that they fought, and it was probably rad. More importantly, the war awoke the bloodlust of the people of Nehellenium, and their hearts were set on epic, galactic war.

Peach Conflicts

  • Assyrian massacres, Death War
  • 45th Union
  • Austrian Experiments

Immortal War

The Immortal Empire was forged in B.R. 1,980 by the brikwarrior Warhead. Over the course of nearly 30 B.R's, the Empire grew beyond its humble beginnings as a DSM empire to control its entire galaxy. The Immortal Emperor's family grows beyond number. By the B.R. 2,009, the Immortals' home galaxy could no longer contain their ambitions, so the Emperor set his eyes on the nearby Galaxia Nehellenium, a galaxy full of nascent space empires ripe for invasion.

The Emperor selected an adopted member of his family to lead the invasion, Warhead. Warhead had established himself as one of the most ruthless and hardcore generals in the ranks of the Immortal Hordes. Warhead chose the Gamma Corps' home world FICO to establish his beachhead. At FICO, the Immortal Hordes discovered that Nehellenium would not be easily invaded, taking heavy losses from the battle. Warhead himself was slain by the Gamma Corps leader Codename: Aegis. Warhead, however, being immortal, instead shattered into shards, and murdered Aegis with his own decapitated head. [[1]]


  • Warhead Shards
  • Immortal League vs. Anti-Immortal Alliance
  • ZZD
  • Stalemate

Medivo

  • ??? stuff happens

AN-TA War

  • Formation of TA
  • Battle of New York
  • Second Battle of New York
  • M-Throne is around here?

Ragnablok

  • Ninja_verse
  • Fall of Trattoria
  • Brootalz invasion

Side Plots

Gold Sector Conflict

  • Many names for the same faction
  • Mostly just Shulga grumping at people

Polish War of Independence

  • USSSR
  • Fighting
  • Lietuva

Magikallenik War

  • Praetoria and Omegalon
  • Darkstorm
  • Phoenicia

Quest of Piltogg

  • See page

Famous Standalones

Goatse Bunker