|The Brikverse always self-corrects.
For too long has complacency and bureaucracy lingered within the universe as a bloated tumor. It was inevitable that such inaction would be met with an equally severe reaction. Ultimately, it came in the form of the BROOTALZ - an enigmatic legion of savage orkoids that erupted like green pus from a fetid wound and descended onto the galaxy. Fueled by nothing but sheer, blind hatred and rage towards everything, the hordes left nothing but complete and utter devastation in their wake.
The BROOTAL plague quickly spread beyond the invading forces. Other orks throughout the galaxy also experienced a strong bloodlust overtaking them, bringing the same degree of relentless carnage to worlds out of reach of the main horde. The concentration of the BROOTALZ' shared psychic fury culminated in a ravenous, astral gestalt that set out to feast on the minds and hearts of the inhabitants of Nehellenium, driving many to similar levels of unbridled frenzy. Others gazed at the brutality and scope of the violence and joined in on the slaughter, either to further their own interests, or because such senseless decimation seemed like a good time to cut themselves (and others) loose.
The BROOTALZ will not stop until the entire Nehellenium Galaxy is ground to dust. The heroes of the Brikverse prepare to make a stand against the savage hordes, not realizing that their assault is only a harbinger of worse things to come... things no one can stop.
Ragnablok is the epic battle, which according to many brik religions, will end the Brikverse in a flood of gore, fire and gratuitous bloodshed. It can also refer to the period of chaos leading up to the final battle.
There were tales that Ragnablok would occur during a Year of Brikthulhu, possibly BR 2,012. However, the Brikverse went through another great year of conflicts, but nothing so cataclysmic as to end it, and Kanon continued to grow. Some kultists believe Ragnablok is a punishment for resisting the natural cycle of Rekonstruktion that should annually reset Kanon. The Kanon reached its breaking point in BR 2,018, kicking off the time of Ragnablok, which continued into BR 2,019. At the end of Ragnablok, the Nehellenium Galaxy was destroyed, ending that chapter of Brikwars Kanon to make way for the next great age and restore the natural balance of Kanon.
- 1 Timeline of Events
- 1.1 Prelude to Ragnablok
- 1.2 Forward to Termination (The Final Moments of the Purple Sector)
- 1.3 DA BROOTAL INVASHUN
- 1.4 Fall of the MoJ
- 1.5 Chaos In The Outer Regions
- 1.6 Austin's Box Saga
- 1.7 The Raising of the Watchtower
- 1.8 The Beige
- 1.9 Battle of the Four Rums
- 1.10 The Konvergence
- 2 Notable Participants
- 3 Artifakts of Ragnablok
Timeline of Events
Prelude to Ragnablok
The Death of Colette
|Doctors Pang and Ong look back on a decade of Trattorian kanon drawing to a close.|
Trattorian Chief Scientist Dr. Ong successfully kills QS Colette, believing that Colette's death will eliminate all nonscientific heresies in the Brikverse. This instead has the opposite effect, as QS Colette was in fact the source of order in a khaotic universe. As a result of Ong's hubris, the nation of Trattoria is fired.
Trattorian elites meet to prepare their response to the end of Trattoria. Though most decide to pursue new careers elsewhere in the Brikverse, a few elect to go into hiding, hoping to ensure not only that Trattoria survives Ragnablok, but returns on the other side to reverse the damage to the Brikverse.
Soldiers from 27 factions in the Brikverse investigate Planet Butt, discovering a powerful buttifakt. A prolonged melee over the buttifakt awakens Brikthulhu, who takes the buttifakt for himself and yeets into the night. Soldiers from the Empire of Luchardsko recover a miniature buttifakt from the battle. They use the power of the Buttnomikon to secure power over the Third Alliance.
|BrikThulhu rises to terrorize the heroes of Phoenicia.|
BrikThulhu appears at the edge of Phoenician space, unleashes a computer virus throughout the Brikverse, and murders a bunch of heroes.
|The Damned arise in Magenta Sector.|
The IM's troubles continue as another agent of Ragnablok appears at one of their holy sites, the black horde known as the Damned. The team sent to investigate is massacred and the Damned begin to spread through the Magenta Sector.
The Road to Ragnablok
Britannians investigating the effects of the Third Impact collect data about Ragnablok. They are confronted by President Bob and forces of the T.L.A. After blokbots materialize around them, both factions make a hasty retreat.
Forward to Termination (The Final Moments of the Purple Sector)
|Peace negotiations in the Lietuvian Parliament are about to devolve into shocking violence and betrayal, like all peace negotiations in the BrikVerse.|
The Polish occupation of Lietuva takes a turn for the worse when the rogue Field Marshall Ryszard Mazurek murders the delegates at the signing of the Lietuvan Treaty of Independence. It is not immediately clear why Mazurek does this, except in some sort of preparation for Ragnablok.
|Field Marshall Mazurek has a surprise in store for Polish high command.|
The news of the massacre on the summit is making big waves, leading to the Lietuvan rebels cutting ties with the Polish occupational forces. However, Polish high command is just as shocked about the incident and attempts to establish contact with the garrison in Lietuva.
Mazurek defeats one last attempt by Lietuvan Rebel forces to unseat him, protecting his dark portal.
President Sadow wakes up from injuries incurred at the Battle of Vilnius to find Poland engulfed in Ragnablokky flames.
As the URP struggles to deal with the fallout from the debacle in Lietuva, Jerzy Durer investigates the portal created by Mazurek with the help of the Cavalry Squadron Lechranger. Using a war titan to distract Mazurek's defense forces, they deploy Jagiełł'oh to Vilnius to see the portal for themselves.
The battle takes a turn for the worse after the whole Lechranger team falls to Mazurek's defenses, leaving only HunGreen to complete the mission. HunGreen infiltrates the base, frees the loyalist prisoners and kills Mazurek.
The Crown of Erebus
|Jerzy Durer battles in orbit to buy time for the Lechrangers on the surface of Vilnius.|
Polish reinforcements arrive at Vilnius to reinforce the heroes. They discover the true nature of the portal, known as the Crown of Erebus. The blood spilled in battle over the last year has been fueling its arcane powers. In addition, the real Mazurek was replaced before the summit and has been held captive by Krull. Polish forces rescue Mazurek, but the Crown of Erebus flies off into an unknown region just as forces from several factions arrive.
Luchardsko, Poland, Krull, Zoltan, the USSSR, Monet, the Immortal Empire, and Blokbots converge at the Crown of Erebus, each hoping to capture the portal for themselves. The bloody battle finally activates the portal, sucking in the survivors.
|Erebus's true nature is revealed.|
The survivors land in Literal Hell. Jerzy Durer is able to defeat the other factions, but remains trapped.
The Crown of Erebus opens one last time, revealing the demon Erebus himself, known also as the Lord of Hell, Hot Dog Boi. Jerzy defeats Erebus by destroying his Crown, saving the people of the Purple Sector. As Literal Hell crashes down around him, Jerzy remembers his companions fondly, knowing that his sacrifice will ensure that their stories can continue on.
DA BROOTAL INVASHUN
- Fleets of Da Brootalz, a race of khaotic orks once held back by Colette's influence, arrive to wreak havok on the Brikverse. Their first encounter is with an RC coalition force, which they massacre.
- After massacring the army, the Brootalz spread throughout the Nehellium galaxy and beyond. Their next recorded battle is in the Magenta sector, interrupting a battle between the IM, Technocrats, USA, and Celestial Kingdom.
- Brootalz ravage the Devoid Sector, putting an abrupt end to the Ecto Conflict. The rearguard of the Brootalz are engaged on Vígríðr Prime by vengeful Gunnar-Grim that survived the Brootal Apocalypse. They now pit Valbrand's Charge against the endless ork hordes.
- Continuing their invasion, the Brootalz interrupt the filming of Space Wars IX. Though the cast and crew are obliterated, the Rhamphonauts successfully defeat Da Brootalz and learn of a way to escape to a Post-Ragnablok universe.
- A band of aggressive children survive a Brootal attack on Saturnalia.
- Meanwhile, the Big Bawss Grimjaw celebrates his victories. The jubilee is cut short by a group of Blackrock orks who appear through a portal. The battle is fierce, but soon a rapport is established and Da Brootalz form the first of many alliances with native Orks.
- The portal technology provided by Blackrock allows the Brootalz to reach new regions of Nehellenium, particularly the Perwar Sector. Something unusual about Brootal technology allows them to ignore the anti-tek field and rapidly spread through the primitive worlds. On Medivo, however, they encounter much tougher resistance and are forced to deploy even greater war machines. Da Brootalz wipe out a warband, except for Squire Timmy, who disguises himself as an albino Brootal.
- An M-Throne patrol in the Rusky Sector identifies a Brootal Fleet and begins to mobilize a local resistance.
- The Immortals establish a foothold on Conselia, the capital of Trattoria. It is immediately threatened by the arrival of Da Brootalz.
- The Immortals desperately defend Conselia City from waves of Brootalz. The degrading ghost of QS! Colette makes a brief appearance and revives some scrap drones. A civilian tour group wanders onto the battlefield and immediately befriends the Brootalz.
- The military leadership of the Imperial Magikstrate meet to determine the best response to the Brootal and Ragnablokalyptik onslaught, and Ibeus has a conversation with a mysterious visitor.
- Following his cybernetik body’s destruction during the Battle of Conselia, Warbawss Grimjaw is rebuilt bigger and badder on the Brootal kapital kroozer, learns of the upcoming Konvergence, and makes a bet with the other Warbawsses to determine who will lead the Brootalz going forward.
Fall of the MoJ
- The spread of "Brootalization" through native ork populations scares many in Nehellenium. The planet Julien is destroyed to prevent the orks there from rising up. This coincidentally closes a major portal to the Negaverse, preventing the Nega-BlokTrix from taking advantage of Ragnablok to invade the Brikverse.
- Agents L and M escape Menagerie with the O.R.A.C.L.E. through a mysterious portal.
- An AN Peacekeeping force attacks the 5th Hobgoblins on Lavarenthe to continue the Orkish Genocide. Major Kezzler defeats the force and decides the only way to survive to strike back. He starts a quest to unite all the hobgoblin units in the galaxy.
- Kezzler's team discovers more hobgoblins on Lavarenthe who reveal the planet was colonized by the great General Lafitte. Thrilled that this could be a hobgoblin homeworld, Kezzler nevertheless suspects a trap.
Chaos In The Outer Regions
- An agent of Brikthulhu is thwarted by Comrade JAM, who then vanishes into a portal.
- Weird covens perform strange rituals in the name of Brikthulhu
- The Ayanami Sector slips into a dark age as Baka Boys invade from within.
- The Phalek Empire decides, in the spirit of Ragnablok, to dissolve its alliances and start a six-way war.
- An unknown faction in the Fringe System deals with an Adorrible invasion. Investigating further, they discover clues about Ragnablok on an abandoned research station.
- The Quantumsurfer Archduke encounters The Horseman of Justice, Corpus Jurus Uncivalus, and defeats him in battle, stealing his Scales of Justice.
- Chief OneEye589 and his cloned bastardfig Fun Police Officers harass some DSMs before he is promoted to Horseman of Justice/Authority following the defeat of Corpus Jurus Uncivalus.
- Frobo the Swaggins, only surviving member of Concave Dolphin, discovers a Nega-Sphinkter on the surface of Planet Butt and converses with a deep-fried reflection of the Nega-BlokTrix, who seduces Frobo with her shitty powers and passes her mantle as the Horseman of Poop to him to facilitate their revenge on the Brikverse and the QuantumSurfers.
- Despite the myriad of problems caused by the khaos of Ragnablok, a group of intrepid minifigs preps for the biggest Hellhunt party in the whole Brikverse. They even managed to book the band Building 4 Destruktion!
Austin's Box Saga
- Meanwhile, events in Trattoria continue to unfold in unexpected and wide-reaching ways. Without Trattoria and its many corporations, and the nations of the RC retreating to protect their own borders, only the USA is left to support the AN, and it is not nearly sufficient for the job. Chaos ensues and the Immortals establish a new foothold in the heart of Trattoria. They mount a strong defense against the Brootalz and begin gathering all legions under the leadership of Sigma Shard. Former Trattorian Chief Science Inspector Dr. Scott Carlson pursues something called "Austin's Box," based on a message from President Austin that was buried deep in the static noise of Trattorian communication networks. He eventually finds it on Planet New York, guarded by President Austin himself!
- President Bob formulates a plan to murder every Warhead Shard, using the chaos of Ragnablok to his advantage. He receives President Austin's transmission and realizes that Austin's Box may contain the Antimortallium he needs to complete his plan. T.L.A. agents cross paths with Dr. Carlson and confirm his suspicions.
- President Bob deploys the W.U.N.D.E.R, a battleship powered by angel technology, and leads the T.L.A. to Planet New York.
- The newly powerful Luchardsko Empire, the Britannian League, and the T.L.A. face off over Planet New York to try to secure Austin's Box for themselves. Da Brootalz are there too, of course. The T.L.A. drives off the Britannian fleet, and the W.U.N.D.E.R. arrives to clean up.
- The Brotherhood of the Shattered Pane watches the events of New York ominously.
- The battle moves to the ground at the Great Battles Memorial, where Dr. Carlson reveals Austin's Box to the world for the first time. Luchardskoans, Immortals, the T.L.A., and Da Brootalz battle with the Trattorian remnant over the ragnabook, but General Blueguy is ultimately able to capture the book for himself. He agrees to re-ally with the T.L.A. and gives President Bob the Antimortallium from Austin's Box.
- President Bob follows the trail to the Antimortallium deposit as the TA fleet secures Planet New York's orbit. Warhead Prime arrives to confront Bob, but the battle is interrupted by the arrival of the Hatredcopter. The Hatredcopter destroys the W.U.N.D.E.R. and shatters New York, with Bob and Warhead on it.
- General Blueguy continues to search for the remaining Ragnabooks with the help of the T.L.A. Their first stop is an abandoned Trattorian research station.
- General Blueguy lands on Iter, where an Immortal deployment are attempting to breaking into the lab with the help of Bot Bragg and his Immortal scientists. The Immortals are routed by the TA forces. A Warhead shard is defeated, and Bot Bragg is captured.
The Raising of the Watchtower
- News of Ragnablok reaches Axeleron through none other than QuantumSurfer Bookwyrm. He enlists the help of adventurer and designated Chosen One Galvyn Kent to return to Axeleron and prepare for the Konvergence before suddenly disappearing.
- Bookwyrm is pulled from his metatextual imprisonment in the Plot Hole back to Axeleron to find it swarming with the agents of the Horsemen of the Brikpocalypse. He discovers that he has been freed by Majistik wizard Vasith Vindelvuur, who tells him he is needed off world to deal with another important threat.
- QuantumSurfer Ken and his buxom companion QT are attacked by an Esduin scouting party. Fortunately, Bookwyrm shows up, creating enough of a distraction for Ken to defeat the party. Bookwyrm enlists Ken into the Watchtower Alliance, a coalition of factions and heroes dedicated to the protection of castle worlds.
- Meanwhile, Vindelvuur rescues a mining company of Novium dwarves from a combined Brootal/Blackrock attack, hoping to bring them into the Watchtower Alliance.
- Traveler’s Society leader Galeo Cantwell prepares his adventurers to pursue members of the Esoterica Metavoth through some strange dimensional rifts that have appeared near the local abandoned wizards tower, but little do they know what they are about to walk into...
- President Vader of the Council of 500 and Sir Gawayn of the Imperial Magikstrate find themselves trapped in the Beige Linoleum after the events of a space battle in the Ninja_verse. Their only way out is to defeat Brikthulhu.
- Also trapped in the Beige is the crew of the T.L.A. Pericles, cast there by the power of Austin's Box. Their ship is a wreck, but a team from the Space Repair Garage shows up to save the day.
- The Pericles reestablishes communication with the W.U.N.D.E.R. just as the crew abandons ship. Meanwhile, Jax Redbird, a member of the garage team, meets with the Street Shaman.
- As construction on the Pericles nears completion, Jax reveals that he and the Street Shaman are QuantumSurfers, namely Ninja_bait and Quantumsurfer. He enlists the Space Repair Garage and the Pericles crew to help him defeat Brikthulhu, claiming this will prevent an apocalypse of Ensanity.
- Jax leads the Pericles and the SRG team into battle against Brikthulhu. The Pericles' unique AT field technology and the SRG's powerful tractor beams are used to restrain Brikthulhu as Quantumsurfer uses his ultimate attack against him.
- Meanwhile, General Blueguy seeks the remaining Ragnabooks. He has pinned their location in the Ninja_verse, and hopes to find a portal to the Ninja_verse in the Trattorian facility on Iter.
- Following a quick defeat from the combined crossfire of Brootalz and Immortals, a drone containing the corrupted ghost of QS Colette, Horseman of Stability, falls into the Beige Carpet, and becomes the multi-colored QuantumStalker Colette.
- In the Ninja_verse, the Council of 500 and their new allies in the Rubrum Crucesignatis defend their homeworld from the invading Immortal Alliance. The DK Warhead Shard, currently wielding the Ragnabook, 'Brikwars: The Visual Dictionary', attacks the leadership of the RC directly but is defeated. When Emperor Auric steps in, Vader and Gawayn arrive from the Beige wielding the Ragnaclock.
- General Blueguy arrives at the battle and breaks the stalemate. Taking all four Ragnabooks, he combines them into the ultimate book of power, the Brikwars Rulebook. Faced by this power, and confirmation of the pending apocalypse, the factions begrudgingly agree to work with Luchardsko to take the fight to the Brikverse's ultimate enemy - The Quantumsurfers themselves!
Battle of the Four Rums
- As Blueguy lays siege to the fortress of the QuantumSurfers, the interdimensional bar known as the Four Rums, the QuantumSurfers get into zany hijinks defending their home. Archduke returns from his exile to find a new QS in AnnoyedZebra's harem, Green.
- Natalya and Braggalot survey the approaching army, and “suggest” that QS Falk try to talk Blueguy down. The negotiations are explosive.
- QuantumSurfers Zee, Archduke, and Green are pulled out of their game of tanks by Blueguy’s assault, and a frequently seen face around the Four Rums makes a sacrifice.
- Tzan frees the severed head of Overwatch from an eternity stuck in Stubby’s rubbish bin. It doesn’t go so hot for him.
- Blueguy and his Luchardskoan honor guard carve a swath of destruction through the defending QuantumSurfers. General Natalya “encourages” the defenders to hold their ground.
- Shadowscythe stands between the assaulting Brikverse armies and the DadSurfers. Blueguy prepares to commit patricide.
- The QuantumSurfer generals find that no place is safe from Blueguy’s wrath. Natalya makes a strategic retreat, and Blueguy overlooks a mysterious laser-eyed cat.
- QS Quantumsurfer feels a great disturbance in the Farce, and tries to show Blueguy a better path. But Blueguy is not to be swayed, even by the wisdom of the First QuantumSurfer.
- Natalya finally faces Blueguy head on. Nova swords collide in a brilliant flash, but the power of the Rulebook cannot be undone.
- QS Ken and the weebs are backed into a corner as Blueguy’s rampage continues, but is interrupted by the sudden crashing of the Invictus into the Four Rums and the arrival of QS Ninja_Bait. N_B confronts the Chosen One and reveals his true form.
- Human!Ninja_Bait explains the truth about Ragnablok to Blueguy, and reveals that a glorious end was the only way to truly save the Brikverse from falling into ruin in the long run. N_B bestows a tiny d6 upon him, and allows him to make one last roll for the fate of all minifigkind. But even minifigs are subject to critical failures...
- With the fully empowered Four Horsemen of the BrikPocalypse unleashed upon the shattering Brikverse, and Blueguy the only one standing between them and their infection of the new universe, QS Ninja_Bait rallies the survivors to the final battle of the Nehellenium, and he and Kommander Ken, Bookwyrm, and the useless cat set off for the Konvergence.
- The DSM Master Builder Primus searches the kosmos for ancient relics that can only be discovered when they are most needed.
- QS Bookwyrm reflects on the upcoming conflict.
- The forces of the Brikverse assemble around the black hole Nexus created by the shattering collapse of the Nehellenium for one last battle, including the Grand Galactic Empire, da Brootalz, the Traveler's Society and their allies, a coalition including the 45th Union, the Assyrians, the Red Alien Guys, the Space Navy, and the Arctic Expedition force, the Pumpking and his Hellhunt Patrons, the Deadly Space Master Builders, a hodgepodge militia led by a new powerful Human known as "The Kid," and even more. The Four Horsemen lead all manner of their agents, monsters, and abominations against them, and even unleash the AN-US Ripper onto the battlefield, but are ultimately unable to stand against the pure Ossum that is being created. Armies clash and glorious khaos creates a cacophonous swansong of Ossumness for the Old Brikverse, warding off the lame BrikPocalyptik energies of the Horsemen and allowing Blueguy to keep the Nexus stable and fuel the creation of the New Brikverse with his own badassery. The Nehellenium collapses into the black hole, trapping many fragments and characters from the Old Brikverse inside, and at last, the Retkonstruktion is finally allowed to renew the universe once again. All is well.
- BATTLE OF THE KONVERGENCE
- DA KONVERGENS BATTEL - A BROOTISH COMMENTAREE
- The Konvergence: Last Hellhunt of the Nehellenium
Agents of Ragnablok
- Brikthulhu and the Four Horsemen of the Brikpocalypse
- Da Brootalz
- Hot Dog Boi
- Rubrum Crucesignatis
- Empire of Luchardsko
- Immortal Empire
- The Grand Galactic Empire
- Phalek empire
- The Frostborne Tribe
- 45th Union
- United Systems Alliance
- Dragon Guard
- The Traveler’s Society
- Menagerie of Julien
- Galacian Imperiya *Only during the battle on Butt
Artifakts of Ragnablok
The Four Ragnabooks are artifakts that focus the powers of the Four Horsemen of the Brikpocalypse. This makes them highly coveted as weapons against the forces of Ragnablok. When all four books are brought together, they combine to form the Brikwars Rulebook itself, in its Ragnablok edition. This tome of tomes gives any minifigure that wields its power the powers of a QuantumSurfer, and immense Ragnablokalyptik strength.
Previous wielders: Brikthulhu
The Buttnomikon is a powerful artifakt for epik battles. All minifigs who see it lust after its power, and will attempt to control it at any cost. It is the weapon of the Horseman of Poop. Its primary power is a Shart Beam, but it can also produce a defensive poop shield. It also causes Brootalz in its vicinity to critfail all rolls. Blue Guy of the Luchardsko Empire retrieved it from the Planet Butt during the Battle of the Buttnomikon and used its power to elevate Luchardsko in the Third Alliance.
Brikwars: The Visual Dictionary
Previous wielders: Secretary Snape, Warhead D.K. Shard, Emperor Auric
Brikwars: The Visual Dictionary contains all knowledge of all things Kanonical in the Brikverse, presented in a visually attractive form. It was developed by the D.K. Warhead Shard while in Trattorian imprisonment. The book is all that remains of QS Colette, the Horseman of Stability. It was stolen from Warhead during the events of "Enter the Ninja_verse" by the Council of 500, but was retrieved by an Imperial blockade. Its primary power is the ability to randomly spawn soldiers and MOCs from every known faction. It also causes Dungans and Shitgoats to tremble in fear.
The AN Charter (Austin's Box)
Previous wielders: Dr. Scott Carlson, President Austin
The AN Charter holds a secret that would end war in the Brikverse - that no minifig is mortal, and that death is only a construct of Plot. This knowledge, if widespread, would cause nations to cease their meaningless fighting. It channels the power of the Horseman of Peace and can vaporize armies in a flash. The AN Charter is also known as Austin's Box, as President Austin was the one to discover the secret. He supposedly cast the Charter in Antimortallium, giving its wielder advantage over Immortals.
Previous wielders: Brikthulhu, Sir Gawayn of the Imperial Magikstrate
The Ragnaclock counts down the days to Ragnablok, and controls the power of Retkonstruktion. Brikthulhu wears it like a wristwatch. Its only demonstrated ability is the power to locally retkon an entire turn, reversing damage and death, and leaving only the wielder aware of the Ragnabook's effects and allowing them to change events the second time around.
The Green Transforming Mace
Current wielder: Kommander Ken
Previous wielder: Zupponn
The Green Transforming Mace, or GT Mace, is the chosen weapon of Zupponn. It can change its form but is always transparent neon green in color. Zupponn awarded it to QS Kommander Ken after defeating Pacifass, the Horseman of Peace in battle.
Current location: Valhalla
The hammer Jarnbjorn is trapped within the warrior's vault in Valhalla. What is it useful for? No one knows.
Emerald Glaive is a heirloom of King Darixus the Great. Legend has it that he forged the glaive from a stone that came from the heavens and can cut through all known materials like butter.